Best Republican Defense EVER!

[Unknown User]

Posted: 8/6/07 at 11:20am

"Are you enjoying the Bob Allen drama as much as I am? How could you not? Few things in life are as entertaining or as satisfying as Republican sex scandals--especially the gay ones.

In case you've been too busy sunbathing, sexing or keeping tabs on Lohan, Florida Republican State Representative Bob Allen was arrested for offering an undercover cop $20 for oral sex in a public men's room in a Florida park. And Bob Allen is not just some little-known perv looking for love in all the wrong places. Nope. Bob Allen chairs the House Energy Committee and co-chairs John McCain's presidential campaign in Florida. He is the Police Union's 2007 Lawmaker of the Year and he has personally sponsored six different sex crime bills during 2007--three focused on indecent exposure and soliciting sex in public parks.
Allen has insisted on his innocence since the June arrest, but on Friday the police released taped statements of the State Representative's defense. Allen is no f*g, he insists, he's just a racist. Running into the men's toilet to escape the rain, he found himself surrounded by big frightening black men and in order to avoid the inevitable mugging he approached one of the larger blacks and offered him $20 for oral sex."



Queersighted Blog

[singtopher]

Posted: 8/6/07 at 11:40am

smooth

[RobbO]

Posted: 8/6/07 at 11:54am

how do you think i made it out of newark alive?!?

[PalJoey]

Posted: 8/6/07 at 12:05pm

How did he decide on $20?

[SonofMammaMiaSam]

Posted: 8/6/07 at 12:10pm

$2 an inch?
Updated On: 8/6/07 at 12:10 PM

[Unknown User]

Posted: 8/6/07 at 12:25pm

According to witnesses, he peeked over the bathroom stall before he made his offer. You can add your own joke here.

[South Fl Marc]

Posted: 8/6/07 at 2:27pm

Too little time - too many jokes.

Why do they always come from Florida?

[The Boy From Ohio]

Posted: 8/6/07 at 3:10pm

Sweet! I'll have to keep that in mind if I'm ever mugged.

[RobbO]

Posted: 8/6/07 at 3:31pm

$20 AND a bj? isn't it customary for the one paying to get the bj? it seems there really is a sucker born every minute!

Updated On: 8/6/07 at 03:31 PM

[tazber]

Posted: 8/6/07 at 4:08pm

You're assuming he was offering the service and not asking for it.

[AnnaK<3LMIP]

Posted: 8/6/07 at 5:01pm

My favorite part is "he's not a f*g he's just a racist".
It's like, "thank God. We need less f*gs and more racists. Whew."

Updated On: 8/6/07 at 05:01 PM

[Unknown User]

Posted: 8/6/07 at 5:18pm

Oh no! He was offering to PERFORM the sex act- not recieve! It reminds me of Toddy's line in Victor/Victoria: "With the exception of piano lessons when I was ten and the Metro, I never PAY to take ANYTHING!"

[singtopher]

Posted: 8/6/07 at 11:38pm

My favorite part is "he's not a f*g he's just a racist".
It's like, "thank God. We need less f*gs and more racists. Whew."

Only in America. Being a f*g is a sin but being a racist is just wrong.