Dying woman recovers, says relatives "robbed me blind"
Dying woman recovers, says relatives "robbed me blind"
#1Dying woman recovers, says relatives "robbed me blind"
Posted: 8/29/09 at 5:45pm
"Evelyn Roth says the only personal item she still has in her possession is the 25th anniversary diamond ring her late husband gave her. She says her relatives couldn't get the ring off her finger when she went into the care center. "I could sit around and sulk and feel bad, but what good would it do?" she says.
Shortly after two women gained power of attorney from a dying 83-year-old relative, they took all of her possessions and sold her house of 56 years, police said.
The pair pocketed the $235,000 from the house sale and cleaned out the elderly woman's bank accounts and savings, sharing the money among themselves and family members, police and prosecutors say. They also arranged and pre-paid for her funeral.
However, Evelyn Roth made an amazing recovery and had no idea what her relatives were up to.
Now the two suspects, Roth's cousin Virginia Ann Kuehn, 66, and her niece Kathleen Sue Jingling, 53, face a 35-count felony indictment charging them with first-degree criminal mistreatment, aggravated theft and first-degree theft. They've pleaded not guilty."
http://www.oregonlive.com/news/index.ssf/2009/08/elderly_woman_says_her_relativ.html
millie_dillmount
Broadway Legend Joined: 4/22/04
#2re: Dying woman recovers, says relatives 'robbed me blind'
Posted: 8/29/09 at 6:27pmUgh.
#2re: Dying woman recovers, says relatives 'robbed me blind'
Posted: 8/30/09 at 8:46am
I just watched a nasty case unfold.
My partner and I used to run into this older man and his nephew at Starbucks. One day in January, we ran into just the nephew on the bus and he said the older man was in the hospital and in a coma.
A few weeks later, the nephew called my partner and asked us over to dinner. Said his uncle was not going to recover and there was a problem with his uncle's car. He said that, when he initially entered the hospital, his uncle had signed the title over to a friend (I'll call her Joan, not her real name). The car was in storage and the uncle had given her some money to keep up the insurance payments and pay for the rented garage. The nephew went off on a rant how this Joan was a nasty vile hag, a drunk, a crackhead. Claimed she spent the money for the insurance and rent on drugs and was harassing him on the phone. He said he wanted to hire my partner to do a repossession of the car. Said he'd pay $200 to get the title back.
Well, my partner was a little leery since the nephew didn't have power of attorney over his uncle's affairs. He said he wasn't going to get totally involved, but offered to go talk to Joan to hear her position and see if she was willing to give turn the title over to the nephew.
My partner went to see this Joan who wasn't the vile hag that the nephew made her out to be. She said that, yes, the uncle had signed the title over to her and asked her to maintain his car while he was in the hospital. She was sorry to hear about his coma, but said she was more than willing to turn the car over because she couldn't drive it. She pulled out the title and signed it right in front of my partner.
When my partner called the nephew back to tell him that Joan gave over the title without a hassle, the nephew got angry and defensive and said he wasn't going to pay. Mind you, my partner hadn't even mentioned the $200 originally promised. The nephew demanded that my partner hand over the title ASAP.
My partner decided that if the uncle had given control of the car to Joan, he was going to respect the uncle's wishes and he mailed the title back to Joan. He decided that if the uncle wanted the nephew to have the car in the first place, he'd have given him the title.
That all was over by the end of February. We'd pretty much forgotten the whole matter until earlier this month.
We were waiting for a bus and...to our surprise...there was the uncle. He recognized us and, well, we were very shocked to see him since when last we'd heard, he was as good as dead.
My partner came clean and told him about the car situation. The uncle said Joan had given him back the car when he got out of the hospital with no fuss. Then he exploded into an angry account of how his nephew had robbed him while he was in the hospital.
The nephew not only tried to get the car, he'd taken all the cash and debit cards from his wallet, withdrawn every dollar from the debit card accounts, gone to his apartment and taken EVERYTHING from the furniture to the cans of tomato sauce. And, while doing all of that, the nephew was constantly urging the man's son to "pull the plug" on the old man.
Really charming situation.
FindingNamo
Broadway Legend Joined: 7/22/03
#3re: Dying woman recovers, says relatives 'robbed me blind'
Posted: 8/30/09 at 10:58amYeesh.
#4re: Dying woman recovers, says relatives 'robbed me blind'
Posted: 8/30/09 at 11:28amGingersnap2, I think your story is just as bad the one in the original post. I have family members who won't speak to one another after my grandmother died.When my Grandma was sick, I would go over to her place and do some light cleaning. One day I pulled an antique table out to clean and noticed a post it on the back with my cousins name on it. I thought that was odd so I went around her place looking. I removed a couple paintings from the wall and saw post its with my cousins name on it. An antique clock,same thing. Bed, dresser, secretary, and so on. I counted about 40 post it's in all.Asked my grandma about this later and she promised certain items to this cousin but nothing really other then mentioning it casually.She was surprised to hear about the post its. When my grandma died and my Mom was the executor of the will,she mentioned these items to my Mom. Mom offered two items to have to remember her by. She had a fit and has not spoken to me,my mom or anyone since. We found it interesting that she seemed to only want the expensive antiques and jewelery(yes,she had a post it on the bottom of her jewelery box)She had no interest in photos,scrap books, or any of the needlepoint my grandma did or some of the art work and pottery of my grandma's, only the "good stuff". Every family has at least one greedy bastard who will put material possessions before family. Its pretty sick!
AEA AGMA SM
Broadway Legend Joined: 8/13/09
#5re: Dying woman recovers, says relatives 'robbed me blind'
Posted: 8/30/09 at 1:36pm
Sad to say that a death in the family, especially of a member who was essentially the matriarch/patriarch, can bring out the ugliest sides of people. My grandmother already saw some of this coming and has since made sure that she has sat down with my father and uncle together and divided some of the sentimental items that she knows are going to cause a fuss. It's such a touchy subject, but one that people need to talk about.
Luckily I don't think anybody in my family is dishonest enough to pull some of the "rob them blind" type of things already posted here, but I guess you can never tell for sure until the circumstances that warrant it arise.
FindingNamo
Broadway Legend Joined: 7/22/03
#6re: Dying woman recovers, says relatives 'robbed me blind'
Posted: 8/30/09 at 1:50pmBefore Post-It notes even existed, my grandmother labelled a few things herself, indicating to whom she wanted them to go.
#7re: Dying woman recovers, says relatives 'robbed me blind'
Posted: 8/30/09 at 2:29pm
Damn. Worst that happened when my grandfather died was a disagreement over who got the biscuit barrel. I'm no longer ashamed to say we lied about it to my cousins and I have it. 'Cos, y'know, it's a BISCUIT BARREL. *shrugs* People really suck. 
StockardFan
Broadway Legend Joined: 6/19/08
#8re: Dying woman recovers, says relatives 'robbed me blind'
Posted: 8/30/09 at 3:53pm
Whoa, people really can be a-holes!
My grandmother isn't sick or anything, but she is 86...she's already starting making lists of who she wants to have what. She doesn't really have anything worth alot of money (except her house which is on the water) but she just wants us to have things to remember her by.
#9re: Dying woman recovers, says relatives 'robbed me blind'
Posted: 8/30/09 at 3:54pmMy mom actually had me and my two sisters go through the house and decide who wanted what. We each picked in order and made a list. It seemed kind of gruesome, but not a bad idea. She already gave us some of the family jewelery that she does not wear. I have my dad's college gold football, and treasure it.
#10re: Dying woman recovers, says relatives 'robbed me blind'
Posted: 8/30/09 at 5:20pm
My grandfather died last year but there was no fighting over anything because my grandmother is still alive. She's not doing so well and I wouldn't be shocked if she went within a year. At that point I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop. My father's family is incredibly selfish. My parents got no items in the will because his sisters asked for things and my parents felt that was crass.
StockardFan
Broadway Legend Joined: 6/19/08
#11re: Dying woman recovers, says relatives 'robbed me blind'
Posted: 8/30/09 at 6:43pmyeah, I wouldn't feel right asking for stuff either. Unless it was something EXTREMELY sentimental, and even then I'd feel like an a$$ asking.
#12re: Dying woman recovers, says relatives 'robbed me blind'
Posted: 8/30/09 at 6:56pmI go out of my way to make sure my sisters don't think I am taking advantage. I am the co-trustee of the trust, and my mom's POA, and live very close to her. She keeps on offering me my dad's stuff, including some antiques from his family. I decline and ask her to see if my sisters want it first to avoid any appearance of impropriety.
#13re: Dying woman recovers, says relatives 'robbed me blind'
Posted: 8/30/09 at 6:59pmMy grandmother has been very insistent about making lists of what we all want when she passes. But I don't really know anyone in my family who's going to turn horribly selfish when the time comes.
#14re: Dying woman recovers, says relatives 'robbed me blind'
Posted: 8/30/09 at 6:59pm
My great-aunt - who was also my foster-mother - used to say after every death in the family (and there were plenty since she was the youngest of seven) that deaths and wills brought out the worst in a family.
After she passed away, you can't count how many relatives came out of the woodwork. People who had never spoken to her in my lifetime (and I'm in my 30s) were calling me, asking all sorts of leading questions, hinting about her will. Everyone figured correctly that she had left everything to me, but they still had to get nosy.
Since she had raised me from infancy and I stayed with her until her terminal illness, she left me everything. The will was very straightforward and simple.
My mother - who hadn't spoken to her in fifteen years and had left off on very bad terms - immediately tried to challenge the will for the house. Mind you, the house isn't anything special. My mother just wanted to see me - her oldest child - out of the street out of pure spite. She'd been planning that since I was a toddler and she lost custody of me.
And, as soon as she belatedly saw a copy of the obit, a younger cousin of mine called me. She'd met my aunt maybe twice when we were in high school. She started off with "Ding-dong, the witch is dead," made some extremely crass remarks about how my aunt raised me, and then asked if I'd sell her my aunt's car really cheap.
Ha, and people wonder why I usually say - if asked - that I have no family.
#15re: Dying woman recovers, says relatives 'robbed me blind'
Posted: 8/30/09 at 7:16pm
That's terrible! Damn, I guess everything should be crystal clear in the will.In our situation, Post it notes on personal items mean nothing.My Mom got everything including her assets and these items my cousin wanted were my Mom's.She never visited my Grandma unless she was ill.My Mom got stuck with medical bills and expenses and still family came out with their hands out looking for anything.
I guess we all could write about how nasty these things get. Getting back to the original story I posted. How can these relatives take everything and leave this woman with nothing and plead not guilty? That just makes my head spin.
TheatreDiva90016
Broadway Legend Joined: 4/10/04
#16re: Dying woman recovers, says relatives 'robbed me blind'
Posted: 8/31/09 at 2:02pm
Romantico,
The story with the post it's sounds like something my mother has done.
She has embarassed herself at family gatherings because of it.
#17re: Dying woman recovers, says relatives 'robbed me blind'
Posted: 8/31/09 at 2:48pm
When my grandfather passed, I was extremely touched when my grandmother thought to give me a couple of things of his. Nothing valuable, but some signature reminders of him. There are a TON of grandkids and great-grandkids, so I was very grateful to be remembered, but then, she has always been extremely thoughtful that way. When she passes, I'm afraid of the carnage that may ensue. There are some family members who will go absolutely NUTS over her stuff, which is mostly only retains emotional value. I think my family will stay out it as much as possible. I can only think of one piece of furniture that had been promised to my mother, but I think we have only a microscopic chance of seeing that end up in my parents' home.
As for my parents, it's just my brother and me, so I don't really know how that's going to play out. They already jokingly said they plan on blowing our inheritance on traveling during their retirement, which sounds just fine to me. I want them to enjoy all the time they have. Neither of them had an inheritance to help them along (actually, it was quite the reverse as they have financially supported their parents quite often), so why should we?
#18re: Dying woman recovers, says relatives 'robbed me blind'
Posted: 8/31/09 at 2:52pm
TheatreDiva,were you as surprised as I was discovering what these post its were for? I did not make the connection at first. It took me about 15 minutes to finally come to the conclusion which led me to go around searching other items to see if post its were on them as well. Grandma even had a box which was basically a safe, under her bed with electronic combination and everything. There was even a post it on that with my cousins name on it. My Mom rolled her eyes and said,'how does she even know whats in there? Mom didn't even know what was in there.She saw a safe and assumed it would be loaded with loot I suppose.When Mom opened it it had mostly paper work,copy of the will,some insurance policies, and about $300 in cash.
This cousin has not spoken to my Mom,I, or anyone from our side of the family since the funeral. None of our calls are ever returned yet she sends us all a Christmas card every year.
TheatreDiva90016
Broadway Legend Joined: 4/10/04
#19re: Dying woman recovers, says relatives 'robbed me blind'
Posted: 8/31/09 at 5:26pm
When my Grandmother died, my mother took EVERYTHING in the house, down to paper napkins, and pots full of dirt (They may have bulbs in them!).
I've also heard that she has tried to pull crap with her cousins, saying that certian items are hers after they pass. No one in the family really wants anything to do with her.
My Aunt (her sister) lives only blocks away and won't even speak to her. I was visiting her and I recognized a table she had as one that was in my Parents room while I was growning up. My Aunt asked if I wanted it, I said no, but I told her to call Mom and tell her I was taking it, just to see what her reaction would be.
My Mother flipped out on the phone and said she was coming over to get the table right then, and I would only get it AFTER SHE DIES!!!!
I'm not kidding. So, I was happy to tell my mother I had no interest in the table at all, and we just wanted to see her reaction.
My mother is bat sh!t crazy.
#20re: Dying woman recovers, says relatives 'robbed me blind'
Posted: 8/31/09 at 5:27pmWell, that explains a lot.
#21re: Dying woman recovers, says relatives 'robbed me blind'
Posted: 8/31/09 at 6:33pm
My my father's younger brother gave their mom a set of 12 silver goblets. She told him that when she passes they would go back to his family. He has four kids...Jenny, Mary Kate, Trica, and Stephen. Jenny is not his child by blood. She's from his wife's previous marriage but he adopted her and she took his last name. My grandmother put a note on the bottom of the box "To Mary Kate or Tricia whoever gets married first". Jenny, as the oldest, should be entitled to them but she isn't because she's not a blood relative.
#22re: Dying woman recovers, says relatives 'robbed me blind'
Posted: 8/31/09 at 6:33pmlost connection while posting and double posted
#23re: Dying woman recovers, says relatives 'robbed me blind'
Posted: 8/31/09 at 7:36pm
When my Grandmother passed away in 1980, my Aunt who was executor of her estate, allowed all my cousins to take from the house anything they wanted. My Father and she fought and stopped speaking to each other for 28 years.
One thing that was overlooked, which I discovered in the basement was a sleeping Santa Clause coin bank from the 1940's. It was a premium the banks gave away when you opened a Christmas account account. I had such wonderful memories of that bank and spending time with both my grandparents over the holidays.
It is a dumb bank but is carries such a wealth of happy childhood memories. I might not have gotten the car or the furniture but what I got was worth a lot more¡
#24re: Dying woman recovers, says relatives 'robbed me blind'
Posted: 8/31/09 at 10:40pmThis thread brings back bad memories. My parents used to be friends with this couple and the woman's mother had died and the father was dying. During his last days, instead of spending time with him, the couple was running around trying to keep the man's assets out of probate. They need his signature on something but he was barely conscious and couldn't lift his hand, and they put a pen in his hand and dragged his hand across the paper and then left him to die alone. They later bragged about it to me. We don't talk much anymore.
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