Worst Audition EVER

[lildogs]

Posted: 9/1/04 at 10:54am

After reading the "Guffman" thread, i thought it might be fun to hear about audition horror stories....

The worst i ever saw was a WHITE FEMALE perform a monologue from J. Leguizamo's "Spic-O-Rama" in which she played the drag queen....it doesn't get any worse than that!

OR does it?

[redhotinnyc2]

Posted: 9/1/04 at 11:13am

A friend of mine sat in on an audition for NUNSENSE once where the character who does all the imitations (don't know her name) was told to read the line a-la Kate Hepburn "The Cala Lillies are in bloom again, such a strange flower.."...well it was a black girl who had obviously never heard of Kate Hepburn and she did it with full tilt black girl attitude - head snap and everything - he said it was one of the funniest things he'd ever seen in his life.

[Matt_G]

Posted: 9/1/04 at 11:24am

When I was in high school, it was mandatory for all the first year drama students to audition for the musical (My Fair Lady) and this young black girl just got up and started rapping "Yo Yo, All I wants is a room somewheres..."

[Mister Matt]

Posted: 9/1/04 at 11:53am

At an audition for Forum, there was one guy who was really out of his mind. For his song he sang something quite badly by Sting a capella while reading the lyrics from the cassette liner. For the movement audition, we had to learn a little combination in groups of three. He tried learning the combination as it was being taught like the rest of us and seemed ok, but when it came time to perform it. rather than attempt the combination at all, he just jumped around maniacally as if in a mosh pit and rolled on the floor while the two girls onstage with him just stood still in absolute shock. He was thrown out of the audition.

PS - I got cast as Hysterium. That was a blast!

[broadwayguy2]

Posted: 9/1/04 at 11:54am

I was auditioning for You're A Good Man, Charlie Brown and the accompanist was COMPLETELY lost during my song.. missed repeats, key changes.. it was AWFUL..... I had to just block it out and sing the number.

Posted: 9/1/04 at 11:56am

Matt - that is one of the funniest things I've ever heard !

[BroadwayMonkey]

Posted: 9/1/04 at 12:30pm

A girl in my drama class got up and sang "Favorite Things" with her hands over her face the entire time because she was "embarassed." She also stood with a major tilt to the right.


She couldn't sing, either.

[nystateomind04]

Posted: 9/1/04 at 12:43pm

My worst audition was when I picked the easiest song I could find- "That Face" from The Producers. For some reason I started singing under the key or whatever, so I guess what happened was that I had to change octaves half way through the songs and it sounded terrible. I don't know how it happened, I've done songs way harder than that and never messed up, oh well.

The worst audition I ever heard was actually not funny at all. This kid at my school with Fuedal Alcholhol Syndrum (sp? sp? sp?) did some very over-the-top song and dance number, and it was kind of embarrassing to watch because people were being very rude, but I just had to say "good for him" for trying- and he got a part too.

[broadwaystar2b]

Posted: 9/1/04 at 1:08pm

Well my personal worst audition ever would have to be when I auditioned for the Broadway Theatre Project in Tampa, was soooo dog-sick I could barely breathe through the dance combo, and then attempted to belt "I'm Not Afraid" from S4ANW. I pity the poor auditioners for having to go through me
The ironic thing is I haven't been sick since then until today AND I have the exact same symptoms.

[DottieD'Luscia]

Posted: 9/1/04 at 1:21pm

I have 2:

When I first started auditioning: at this one particular audition I was so nervous I didn't even remember the title of the song I was singing. When asked what I would be singing, I responded, "I don't remember, but if you start playing, maybe I'll remember it then." The accompanist started playing and I just stood there with a blank look on my face, like I had never heard the song before in my entire life.

2nd (tour of The King & I): Again, nervousness has a way of creeping up on me. I was singing and unfortunately I was off key. I knew I was off key and for the life of me I could not correct it. I was told to stop singing!!! I have never been more embarassed in my entire life!!!

[Matt_G]

Posted: 9/1/04 at 1:22pm

Oh, DGrant, we videotaped them all too, and I would give anything to find who has that tape.

[Mythus]

Posted: 9/1/04 at 1:35pm

This probably wasn't the worst audition ever, but it was pretty bad...

I was at auditions for Anne of Green Gables, and one girl sang "God Save the Outcasts". At the end of the first verse, we clapped, expecting her to be finished...and she wasn't. She sang the entire song. We clapped at the end of each verse, and eventually we were clapping to try and point out that she should stop singing.

Normally, I wouldn't have minded listening to the song, but she wasn't that great of a singer and she had one of those "I'm better than all of you" attitudes.

At the end, she tried to hit the high note, and she couldn't. She still looked pleased.

[spiderdj82]

Posted: 9/1/04 at 1:41pm

I was auditioning for some kind of regional/national contest (the name escapes me) but I had to sing three songs and mine were ("Suppertime" from YAGMCB, "Falcon in the Dive" from SP, and "Once Upon A Time Today" from CALL ME, MADAM). The first song the people who I was audtioning for chose was "Suppertime." I got up there and got in my first stance (Dancing was involved) and then all of a sudden the accompanist started and went WAY WAY WAY too fast. I was jumping all over the place and singing so fast. After the song, I had to go directly into "Once Upon a Time Today" which is a ballad. I was so out of breath I couldn't sing hardly any of the notes. Instead of singing my third song, they told me "Thank You" and I left. I was SOOOOOOOO pissed the rest of the day.

[redhotinnyc2]

Posted: 9/1/04 at 4:04pm

Spider - and what did you learn from that experience? You ALWAYS have the right to stop the accompanist and ask to start over again - you have that right and you should take control in those situations. No one can fault you for that and they might even respect you more for knowing how you want to do it and then doing it your way.

[LadyGuenevere]

Posted: 9/1/04 at 4:31pm

My worst audition was my first audition.

I was stupidly auditioning for a theater season, with the song "Extraordinary" from Pippin. (Yes, I am a female.) I still don't know what possessed me to sing it...I'm more a 'character' person, so I said to myself "I'm going to bring in something that's NOT 'On my Own', 'Much More' or anything like that."

Obviously, I did. And the piano player messed it up. REALLY messed it up. She actually skipped a whole section and I kept on singing and started to look puzzled...it was so horrible, finally, they just yelled "STOP! Thank you!" and I was out of there. I was a total wreck.

[Rathnait62]

Posted: 9/1/04 at 4:34pm

Oh redhot, I had an audition on Monday night (for an amateur thing, but in the city) and I haven't done anything like that in so long, that when the pianist started a good half again as fast as the song should be, I just went along with it! Raced through. Didn't even THINK to start over - till I was done, of course...

[redhotinnyc2]

Posted: 9/1/04 at 4:42pm

Rath - thats one of the things I learned from my last and best teacher, Andy Gale. The audition is YOUR time and it is meant to show you in your best light - so you completely have the right to start over again if the need arises (hopefully it won't). I love that man! I learned so many great things from him.

[Rathnait62]

Posted: 9/1/04 at 4:44pm

Yeah, I should have done that. It's okay though - I still ended up doing really well and was cast. I just felt like an idiot afterward for being that nervous. I would tell anyone else to do that, yet I was too silly to do it myself!

Updated On: 9/1/04 at 04:44 PM

[redhotinnyc2]

Posted: 9/1/04 at 4:53pm

I'm off to rehearse my cabaret act!
G'Night, Possums!