children of the 80's unite!
children of the 80's unite!
#0children of the 80's unite!
Posted: 2/10/05 at 3:49am
the clarissa thread got me.
You Might Be a Child of the 80s if...
...you won't walk into the place where you once knew every bartender on a first name basis because "there's too many kids there..."
...Schoolhouse Rock played a HUGE part in how you actually learned the English language...
...kids that work in restaurants and supermarkets are starting to piss you off by calling you "sir" or "ma'am"...
...you ever dressed to emulate a person you saw in either a Duran Duran, Madonna, or Cyndi Lauper video...
...you can remember singing along with Kim "We're the Kids in America" Wilde and not feeling age conscious...
...you know, by heart, the words to any "Weird" Al Yankovic song...
...you have begun to lust after women (or men) that it would be socially inappropriate for you to date due to their age...
...you remember the first time "Space: Above and Beyond" aired - it was called "Battlestar Galactica"...
...songs by Debbie Gibson still haunt you to this day...
...going to keg parties no longer involves hiding out in the woods when the cops show up...
...you're starting to get that "why aren't you married yet" shpiel, not just from parents, but now from friends that are married...
... you're parents wanted you to attend medical school, but you decided it was pointless since Quincy got all the babes anyway...
...when somone mentions two consecutive days of the week, the Happy Days theme is stuck in your head for hours on end...
...you know what "Sike" means...
...you know the profound meaning of "Wax on,Wax off"...
...you know that another name for a keyboard is a "Synthesizer"...
...you can sing the McDonald's Big Mack Filet-o-fish, quarter pounder, french fry song while jump roping...
...you ever ended your sentence with "psych"...
...you solved the Rubics cube.....by peeling off the stickers...
...you watched the pound puppies...
...you can sing the rap to "the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air"...
...you yearned to be a member of the Baby-sitters club and tried to start a club of your own...
...you owned those little Strawberry Shortcake scented dolls...
...you know what 'Whoa' means from Blossom...
...you remember trying to guess the episode of the Brady Bunch from the first scene...
...you remember when Madonna was just hitting the scene...
...you've ever shopped at a Banana Republic or Benetton, but not in the last five years...
...the Brady Bunch movie brought back cool memories...
...you remember when "The Reflex" was a cool song...
...you remember, "Hey, let's be careful out there."...
Three words: "Atari" "IntelliVision" and "Coleco". Sound familiar?
...you remember the days when "safe sex" meant "my parents are gone for the weekend"...
...you remember "Friday Night Videos" before the days of MTV...
...a predominant color in your childhood photos is "plaid"...
...while in high school, you and all your friends discussed elaborate plans to get together again at the end of the century and play "1999" by Prince over and over again...
...you remember when music that was labeled "alternative" really was...
...you, yes you, sat down and memorized the entire lyric sheet to "It's the end of the world as we know it"...
...you know who Fat Albert is. (And who was old boy with the pink mask?)...
...you could breakdance, or wish you could...
Three words: M.C. Hammer...
...you thought it would be great to have a friend named "boner"...
...you can sing the entire theme song to "Duck Tales"...
...you played the chipmunks Christmas album all year long...
...the crypt keeper really freaked you out...
...you remember reading Kool-Aid man comics...
...you ever watched Fraggle Rock
...you took family trips BEFORE the invention of the mini-van. You rode in the back of the station wagon and you faced the cars behind you in the tail-gunner position...
...you know all the words to the double album set of Grease...
...you ever had a Dorothy Hamill haircut...
...you sat with your friends on a Friday night and dialed 867-5309 to see if Jenny would answer...
..."All skate, change directions" means something to you...
...you owned a pair of Rainbow suspenders just like Mork used to wear...
...you bought a pair of Vans and wanted to order a pizza in history class so you could be just like Jeff Spicoli in Fast Times as Ridgemont High...
...you owned a preppy handbook...
...you were too young to go see the Blue Lagoon so you just had to settle for second hand reports...
...you remember when there was only PG and R none of this PG-13 crap...
...you learned to swim about the same time Jaws came out and still carry the emotional scars to this day...
...you remember when your cable TV box had a sliding selector switch...
...you actually believed everything Leonard Nimoy told you on "In Search Of..."
...you wanted to be The Hulk for Halloween...
...you Believed that "By the power of Greyskull, you HAD the power!"...
...partying "like it's 1999" seemed SO far away...
...you thought that Transformers were more than meets the eye...
...you had plastic streamers on the handle bars of your bike...
...you remember when it was actually worth getting up early on a Saturday to watch cartoons ...you wore a pony tail to the side of your head...
...you saw the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles on the big screen...
...you got super-excited when it was Oregon Trail day in computer class at school...
...you made your mom buy you one of those clips that would hold your shirt in a knot on the side...
...you had a Kirk Cameron poster on your bedroom wall...
...your jaw would ache by the time you finished those brick sized packages of Bazooka gum...
...you know who Bo and Luke Duke are...
...you remember when VCRs cost $2,000...
...you remember when there was nothing strange about Bert and Ernie living together...
...you remember rotary dial telephones...
...you actually believed that Mikey, famed for his Life cereal commercials, died after eating a packet of pop rocks and drinking a Coke...
...the theme song to Greatest American Hero still comes back to you on occasion...
...you remember the days that hooking your computer into your television wasn't an expensive option that required gadgets - it was the ONLY option...
...you remember the original version of Windows: Macintosh...
...you thought "Weird Science" was a masterpiece...
...you actually know who Rick Springfield is...
...you remember with pain the sad day when the Green Machine hit the streets and made your old Big Wheel obsolete...
...you wanted to be on Star Search...
...you can remember Michael Jackson when he was black...
...you wore a banana clip at some point during your youth, or knew someone who did...
...you played the game "Mash" with friends at school...
L.A. GEAR...
...you wanted to change your name to Jem in kindergarten...
...you remember reading "Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing" and all the Ramona books...
...you wanted to be a Goonie...
...you ever wore fluorescent, neon if you will, clothing...
...you remember when film critics raved that no movie could ever possibly get better special effects than those in the movie TRON...
...you jammed to the Miami Vice theme and thought Jan Hammer was cool...
...you wanted to move to Hawaii because that's where Magnum lived...
...you ever used the phrase "Kiss mah grits!" in conversation...
...you remember any or all of the following: Echo & the Bunnymen, Cutting Crew, Scritti Politti, or Orchestral Maneouvers in the Dark...
...you watched HR Puffenstuff as a child, but now that you're older, you really understand that it would have been much better had you known about drugs at the time...
...you've recently horrified yourself by using any one of the following phases:
"When I was younger"
"You know, back when..."
"Because I SAID so, that's why"
"Just can't (fill in the blank) like I used to"
...you can't remember a time when "going out for coffee" DIDN'T involve 49,000 selections to choose from...
...you're starting to view getting carded to buy alcohol as a GOOD thing, and you're ready to marry the next person who cards you when you want to buy cigarettes...
...at one point during your teenage years, you walked with a noticeable tilt to one side due to the number of plastic rings on that arm...
... "Celebration" by Kool & the Gang was one of the hot new songs when you first heard it at a school dance...
...the first time you ever kissed someone at a dance fell during "Crazy for You" by Madonna...
...you remember the garbage pail kids, and owned some of their cards or knew someone who did...
...you knew what Willis was "talkin' 'bout"...
...you HAD to have your MTV...
...you always wondered why Tootie always wore those damn skates...
...you wanted to be on StarSearch...
...you can remember what Michael Jackson looked like before his nose fell off...
...you remember the craze, and then banning of slap bracelets...
...you still get the urge to use "NOT" at the end of every statement you make...
...you remember Hypercolor T-shirts...
...you remember Punky Brewster...
...you loved Howard the duck...
...you've told someone that they remind you of the babe...
...there were at least three people in your school that voluntarily went by the names of "Skip" "Buffy" "Muffy" or "Dexter"...
...you ever owned one of those embarrassing crimping irons...
...you used to hold in your head the thought that all those gold chains on Mr. T actually looked kinda cool and the thought that Mr. T made millions seemed rational to you at the time...
... (guys) your first wet dream occurred to thoughts of Jeannie, Marsha Brady, Samantha from Bewitched or, for those hardcore comic fans out there, Daphne from Scooby Doo, Josie or any one of her Pussycats...
...(girls) you thought Shaun Cassidy was "dreamy", lusted after "Ted, your ship's photographer" on the Love Boat and Chachi, or, to keep it fair to the comically interested, thought Fred was just a hunk on Scooby Doo...
...you're still occasionally suffering flashbacks from your 21st birthday party...
...you're starting to dread you're 30th birthday, and have even begun going into denial about it's possibility...
...you're starting to believe that maybe 30 isn't so old after all, and it's those people over 40 you have to look out for...
...you freaked out when you found that you now fall into the "26 - 50" age category on most questionnaires...
...you wore anything Izod, especially those windbreakers that folded up into a pouch you could wear around your waist...
...you owned a Jordache anything, or you remember when Jordache jeans were cool...
...in your sophomore class picture, you're wearing an Izod shirt with the collar "up"...
...you actually thought "Dirty Dancing" was a REALLY good movie...
...you watched Purple Rain over and over again...
...you remember the episode of Good Times when Flo broke down after James' funeral...
...you remember when ATARI was a state of the art video game system; You own any cassettes...
...you thought Sheera and He-Man should hook up...
...you thought your childhood friends would never leave because you exchanged "friendship bracelets" made of gimp...
...you ever owned a pair of Jelly Shoes...
...after you saw Pee-Wee's Big Adventure you couldn't stop saying "I know you are but what am I?"...
...you remember going to the skating rink before there were inline skates...
...you ever got seriously injured on a slip and slide...
...your "dressy" wardrobe centered on pastels and linen blazers - guys included...
...your hair, at some point in time in the 80's, became something which can only be described by the phrase "I was experimenting"...
...this timeline appropriately describes actual events in your life:
Star Wars opens, you are still in single digit ages, and you think the creatures are WAY cool.
Empire Strikes Back opens, you are now in early double digit ages, and you are convinced that the special effects are much better, the characters are cool, and you want one of every collectible out there.
Return of the Jedi hits the theaters...you are now a teenager, and you cannot get your eyes off Princess Leia's breasts or Han Solo's butt. You fantasize forever and ever about it, and send off to join every fan club for them on the planet, hanging posters, photos, and "teen"-type magazine spreads all over your walls and lockers at school...
...you're starting to believe (now that it wouldn't affect YOU) that maybe having the kids go to school year-round wouldn't be such a bad idea after all...
...you're doing absolutely nothing with anything pertaining to your major degree...
...you're finding that you just don't understand more than half the lingo used on MTV any more...
...(mostly guys on this one) sex is still as much fun as it used to be, and you're still really interested in it, but you just want to make sure there's nothing really good on cable that you'd be missing first...
...you ever wanted to be gagged with a spoon...
...U2 is too "popular" and "mainstream" for you now...
...you spent endless nights dreaming about being the Bionic Woman or Wonder Woman or the Six Million Dollar Man...
...you had ringside seats for Luke and Laura's wedding (on General Hospital)...
...you were led to believe that in the year 2000 we'd all be living on the moon...
...you remember and/or owned any of the Care Bear Glass collection from Pizza Hut or any other stupid collection they came out with...
...Poltergeist freaked you out...
...you carried your lunch to school in a Gremlins or an ET lunch box...
...you know not to mix poprocks and soda...
...you have played with a 'skip-it'...
...you had or went to a birthday party at McDonald's in the caboose...
...you've ever wanted to go to Degrassi High...
...you ever sat on or used one knee on a skateboard...
...you learned oldies songs by watching Alvin and the Chipmunks...
...you had a Glow Worm...
...your fondest childhood memory is when Skippy got his head stuck in the banister...
...you think the Two Coreys are "totally awesome"...
...you're still bitter that Wham! broke up...
...you type all of your term papers on a Commodore 64...
...the only video games you play are Frogger and Pac Man...
...you know it's not "comma, comma, comma" it's karma...
...you harbor a secret dream of being slimed by Alistair...
...your prized possesion is a collection of "Return of the Jedi" Shrinky Dinks...
...you know whose number is 867-5309...
...you get depressed thinking about Anthony Michael Hall's career...
...you have a duck phone and ride around your house on a little train...
...you know that "Weird Science" was a movie before a tv show...
...you have ever pondered why Smurfette was the ONLY female smurf...
...you know what leg warmers are and probably had a pair...
...you wore biker shorts underneath a short skirt and felt stylish, or knew someone who did...
...you had a Swatch Watch with the Swatch Guard...
...you remember dancing along with the Bangles in "Walk Like An Egyptian"...
...you remember Heathcliff the orange cat...
...you saw the California Raisins Christmas claymation special...
...you remember Popples...
...you wore socks over tights with high-top Reeboks...
...you've gone through this list occasionally saying "That wasn't from the 80's"...
...your favorite party game is Hungry Hungry Hippos...
...you liked Tom Hanks better when he was a crossdresser...
...you know which Hollywood Square Jm J Bullock was in...
...you practice getting in and out of your car through the windows...
...you have the tendency to turn up the collar of your polo shirts...
...you know what the "P" in "Alex P. Keaton" stands for...
...you keep asking your teachers if instead of the quiz you can take the physical challenge...
...you can name all of the Thundercats...
...you got a hankerin' for a hunk of cheese...
...you know that Mr. Steele functions best in an advisory capacity...
...you still use your hair crimper before going out on a hot date...
...you hatch plots to break Murdock out of VA hospital...
...you know who shot J.R....
...this rings a bell: "and my name, is Charlie. They work for me."...
...you thought UTFOs "Roxanne, Roxanne" song was the bomb...
...you remember when Saturday Night Live was funny...
...you had Wonder Woman or Superman underoos...
...you know what a "Push Up" ice cream is...
...you wore like 8 pairs of socks at once, scrunched down...
...you remember boom boxes instead of CD players...
...you've ever rideen a Pogo ball...
...you remember watching both "Gremlins" movies...
...you watched Alf and thought Doogie Howser was hot...
#1re: children of the 80's unite!
Posted: 2/10/05 at 10:56am
These SO apply to me!
*Schoolhouse Rock actually helped me learn my multiplication tables and the Preamble (which I can still recite)
*it pisses me off when ADULTS call me ma'am (I'm only 20! That makes me a "miss," thank you!)
*the Crypt Keeper scared the hell out of me
*Duck Tales! Ah-WOO-ooh!
* I LOVED Puond Puppies, and I think I still have them somewhere
*I wanted a slap bracelet SO badly
*I still think Doogie Howser is hot...
#2re: children of the 80's unite!
Posted: 2/10/05 at 11:06amMe thinks a lot of those items came from being a child of the 70s. For example, Colecovision came out in I believe 84 (or earlier) and didn't last that long. Schoolhouse Rock was also the 70s...
#3re: children of the 80's unite!
Posted: 2/10/05 at 11:10am"You got super-excited when it was Oregon Trail day in computer class at school" - This was like every day for me in elementary school.
Allie
Broadway Legend Joined: 11/2/04
#4re: children of the 80's unite!
Posted: 2/10/05 at 11:12am
I think my family may have been behind the times. I was born in '86, and I remember a LOT of this stuff, too!
I'm also reminded of our computer when I was little: a Commodore 64. That thing rocked.
laactress
Broadway Legend Joined: 9/7/04
#5re: children of the 80's unite!
Posted: 2/10/05 at 11:12amLOL this stuff is SO funny and SO true!
#6re: children of the 80's unite!
Posted: 2/10/05 at 11:20amrock on! almost all of those apply to me except for a few of the 70's ones. you had oregan trial day at school too? that game was so fun. i'm all nostalgic now. 80's powah!
Gothampc
Broadway Legend Joined: 5/20/03
#7re: children of the 80's unite!
Posted: 2/10/05 at 12:33pm
When I was young, it seemed that life was so wonderful,
a miracle, oh it was beautiful, magical.
And all the birds in the trees, well they'd be singing so
happily,
joyfully, playfully watching me.
But then they send me away to teach me how to be sensible,
logical, responsible, practical.
And they showed me a world where I could be so dependable,
clinical, intellectual, cynical.
There are times when all the world's asleep,
the questions run too deep
for such a simple man.
Won't you please, please tell me what we've learned
I know it sounds absurd
but please tell me who I am.
Now watch what you say or they'll be calling you a radical,
liberal, fanatical, criminal.
Won't you sign up your name, we'd like to feel you're
acceptable, respectable, presentable, a vegetable!
At night, when all the world's asleep,
the questions run so deep
for such a simple man.
Won't you please, please tell me what we've learned
I know it sounds absurd
but please tell me who I am.
#8re: children of the 80's unite!
Posted: 2/10/05 at 12:40pm
I was a child in the 80's, not a teenager in the 80's but a lot of those still apply to me.
I remember looking forward to "Oregon Trail days" in computer class. Ah, the old computers that had only DOS. haha.
#9re: children of the 80's unite!
Posted: 2/10/05 at 12:44pm
"...you know what leg warmers are and probably had a pair..."
Scary but true fact: at a gay bar in Seattle a couple of weeks ago a guy was wearing them!
Gothampc
Broadway Legend Joined: 5/20/03
#10re: children of the 80's unite!
Posted: 2/10/05 at 12:47pm
What is Oregon Trail Days??
Also:
You were more interested in watching Elvira than the movie she was promoting
You stayed up late at night (I think it was Sunday night) to listen to Dr. Ruth because she told you everything you wanted to know but were afraid to ask
#11re: children of the 80's unite!
Posted: 2/10/05 at 12:51pm
For the record:
Dirty Dancing WAS a really good movie and STILL IS.
You weren't really cool wearing an Izod shirt with the collar up unless you were wearing more than one and they were different colors.
When Skippy and Mallory were trapped in the basement was my personal favorite.
Banana Republic and Benetton were not as cool as Panama Jack or Units.
The first Atari came with Combat and Outer Space and had sharp corners rather than rounded.
I never had a Glow Worm, but my cousin had an Inch Worm.
Voltron was way cooler than Thundercats. The space version was the best, but was not shown as much.
Micronauts are probably the greatest toy ever created. I had the remote-controlled Star Cruiser.
Martha Quinn WAS MTV. MTV used to play music videos. That is where the name came from.
Not only did Florida break down when James died, she broke the big punchbowl and yelled, "DAMN! DAMN! DAMN!" which I yell on occasion myself when life gets a little too overwheling. Historical television moment.
Not only did I have a pair of Jordache jeans, but I remember the infamous commercial with the guy walking into the bar that focused primarily on his ass. We need those kinds of jeans again.
I notice there was no mention of the metallic silver and gold purses with matching belts and shoes or the popular paint-splatter motif found on practically everything. And how about those painter's caps. I like the ones with the flaps in the back that cover your neck. Those were vicious.
I did not discover Kool and the Gang's "Celebration" at a school dance. That is how I discovered "Get Down On It".
My brother and I played MASH all the time. It was best with pencils because the lines were thicker. Just be sure not to make your dot too big.
Before my family got cable or a VCR, I would go to my friend's house and watch movies on his Beta and argue over which was the best Asia song.
I have never heard of Oregon Trail.
I knew all 101 Uses For a Dead Cat.
Murphy's Law was hilarious.
I had checkerboard Vans AND rainbow suspenders AND a Lightning Bolt velcro wallet AND a hooded baseball t-shirt.
I listened to the Valley Girl soundtrack on LP and memorized all the lyrics. I also remember WHY Nicholas Cage's character was considered so freakish. If you weren't from the era, you will watch the movie and have no idea what the big deal is.
When I see Sarah Jessica Parker I immediately hear "Square Pegs! Square Pegs! Square...Square...PEGS! (One size does not fit all)" in my head.
I never peeled the stickers off a Rubik's Cube. I learned how to take the blocks apart and put them back together.
judy_in_disguise
Broadway Legend Joined: 5/31/04
#12re: children of the 80's unite!
Posted: 2/10/05 at 2:26pm"conjuction junction, what's your function?"
broadway_star_tomorrow
Broadway Legend Joined: 11/3/04
#13re: children of the 80's unite!
Posted: 2/10/05 at 2:40pm"don't go making phony calls, please stick to the 7 digit numbers you're used to"
Type_A_Tiff: There's nothing hard about her. Broadway_star_tomorrow: Yeah. Her arteries.
Gothampc
Broadway Legend Joined: 5/20/03
#14re: children of the 80's unite!
Posted: 2/10/05 at 3:07pmRemember when something was High-larious
#15re: children of the 80's unite!
Posted: 2/10/05 at 4:10pmWhen I was in the first grade, the big insult was to say, "You're corroded!"
#16re: children of the 80's unite!
Posted: 2/10/05 at 4:36pmMax Headroom and Spuds McKenzie...
Gothampc
Broadway Legend Joined: 5/20/03
#17re: children of the 80's unite!
Posted: 2/10/05 at 4:39pmThe PTL Club. (Tammy Faye had a really good singing voice).
Marquise
Broadway Legend Joined: 6/1/04
#18re: children of the 80's unite!
Posted: 2/10/05 at 4:45pm
stop it! stop it! y'all are killing me!!!
:: goes off to find his rubik's cube ::
#19re: children of the 80's unite!
Posted: 2/10/05 at 5:15pmI still have my Merlin electronic game and it still works. I like to play Magic Square with it.
#20re: children of the 80's unite!
Posted: 2/10/05 at 5:30pm
i hated my rubix cube... and yes, i did peel off the stickers at one point. and i loved slap bracelets. and yes, we did get them banned. 
i kind of miss leg warmers when it's cold out. i heard they were making a comeback, but who knows, it never gets cold enough here for me to know if they're coming back or not.
#22re: children of the 80's unite!
Posted: 2/10/05 at 8:40pmRollerskates!!! I spent so many afternoons as a young teen at the skating rinks... and they were packed. Ok... it was late 70's... but it did carry into the early 90's. XANADU!
#23re: children of the 80's unite!
Posted: 2/11/05 at 3:08am
"I grew up on five-alive
And transformers and slip-n-slide
Toys 'R' Us and Chuck E. Cheeze
Disco out and techno in
to synthesize my favorite sin
And here I am on my knees
To get it back again
Babies of the 80s
Little girls in lycra shorts
Tented beds, nerf contact sports
My babies of the 80s
Shout it out just one more time
For the generation that was all mine
We learned to crawl on linoleum floors
Ronald Regan fought Star Wars
But he'll never be Han Solo
Students march Tienemen Square
They took him out; hey that's not fair
Dad said it's good to be free
As we watched from our T.V.
Babies of the 80s
Little girls in lycra shorts
Tented beds, nerf contact sports
My babies of the 80s
Shout it out just one more time
For the generation that was all mine
We watched the wall fall down
Woke up early for Bozo the clown
MTV and Nick at Nite
And I slept for the first time
Without the light
without the light
without the light
My Babies of the 80's
Little girls in jelly shoes
Got the Ferris Bueller blues
My babies of the 80s
I guess we could be something after all
Who knew?
Yes, we could be something after all
Who knew?
Yes we would be something after all
Who Knew?"
~ Something Corporate, "Babies of the 80s"
Yes, it's true. I was born in the 80s.
starshine2
Understudy Joined: 6/16/04
#24re: children of the 80's unite!
Posted: 2/11/05 at 4:46amDon't forget Rappers Delight & Electronic Football
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