Lyrics in musicals that make you itch

[SF055]

Posted: 6/23/08 at 10:02am

Castle on a Cloud:

There is a room that's full of toys
there are a hundred boys and girls.

it was so easy to make it rhyme...but they did not.

[Patash]

Posted: 6/23/08 at 11:51am

SFO55 -- the first two lines of each verse specifically do NOT rhyme, why would that one be any different?

"There is a castle on a cloud,
I like to go there in my sleep,
Aren't any floors for me to sweep,
Not in my castle on a cloud.

There is a room that's full of toys,
There are a hundred boys and girls.
Nobody shouts or talks too loud,
Not in my castle on a cloud.

There is a lady all in white,
Holds me and sings a lullaby,
She's nice to see and she's soft to touch,
She says, "Cosette, I love you very much!"

There is a place where no one's lost,
There a place where no one cries,
Crying, at all, is not allowed,
Not in my castle on a cloud."

[BustopherPhantom]

Posted: 6/23/08 at 12:09pm

Anytime someone tries to rhyme a word that ends with a vowel with a word that ends with a 'd'.

ex. One set of lyrics in the flop musical MARLOWE tried to rhyme "a fifteenth-century man with a twentieth-century mind" with "born before his time."

[dancingthrulife04]

Posted: 6/23/08 at 12:29pm

"How could she just suddenly, completely disappear into thin water?"

- The Little Mermaid

[Reginald Tresilian]

Posted: 6/23/08 at 12:31pm

You're correct, Patash, but what's annoying in "Castle on a Cloud" is that the rhyme scheme changes. It's a-b-b-a in the first stanza, then a-b-c-c- for the others (excluding "lady all in white" B section).

So it's still definitely annoying.

[LePetiteFromage]

Posted: 6/23/08 at 12:32pm

Updated On: 5/3/09 at 12:32 PM

[South Fl Marc]

Posted: 6/23/08 at 12:35pm

There are so many lyrics from Shenedoah that are soooo bad - here's one:

Next to lovin, I like Fightin
I like fightin , it's excitin
Next to loving I fightin best

Next to being hugged and kissed
I like makin me a fist
Next to Lovin I like fightin Best
Next to Lovin I like fightin Best

[K8eeyore]

Posted: 6/23/08 at 1:44pm

Speaking of SHENANDOAH, from the same song:

Next to smellin' me a rose
I like stompin' on some toes
Next to lovin' I like fightin' best.

My personal fave as far as bad lyrics from that show.

[heathurrr]

Posted: 6/23/08 at 1:58pm

I just bought 'someday' from The Wedding Singer on iTunes, because I needed a Laura Benanti fix, and I have to say the lyrics are pretty god-awful.

EDIT - these are the lyrics

I know not every marriage
Lasts when things go bad
I’ve seen the warning signs
I call them “Mom” and “Dad”
But soon you’ll take my hand
And pledge your love to me
Till then I’ll just get married vicariously

Updated On: 6/23/08 at 01:58 PM

[jasonf]

Posted: 6/23/08 at 2:10pm

I give a pass to the Popu-ler, Lahr line because I like to think they're paying homage to Bert Lahr there. A stretch perhaps, but it gets me through...


I hate any rhyme where a singular word is paired with another word that WOULD rhyme - if it wasn't plural. I can't think of any specific examples right now, but an example would be if someone tried to rhyme: "head" with "beds"

[Weez]

Posted: 6/23/08 at 2:32pm

I'm an unashamed Frank Wildhorn fan, and my favourite work of his is 'The Civil War', but that doesn't mean I don't find the lyrics utterly hilarious at times. Observe these opening lyrics from the song 'Judgement Day'. This song is up-tempo, almost upbeat, and I laugh every time I hear it.

"And sometimes it's too much to bear
The dead and dying everywhere
And every day for me is judgement day
Every day for me is judgement day

I sit among my charts and maps
And hear the lonely call of Taps
Like the wind across the moon"

It proceeds to burble on about sending boys out to die, killing floors, bloody sounds of war, all to an almost perky melody. It's *just* dignified enough that the song isn't completely ridiculous, but it's still uptempo enough that it seems a bizarre juxtaposition with such doom 'n' gloom lyrics.

I'm also a big fan of the Australian musical 'Paris', about the siege of Troy, purely because of the way they manage to stretch the word "Aphrodite" out to five syllables in one song. That takes some doing! XD

EDIT: ohhh, and I completely forgot about the song 'Missing You (My Bill)', also from 'The Civil War'! With such choice segments as:

"I learned to chop a tree today
I laughed so hard I cried
And Billy helped and scraped his knee
But he took it all in stride"

and

"The parlour roof still leaks a bit
Where the gable meets the eave
You always meant to get to it
But I know you had to leave"

How can we not consider this song a comedy classic? And Deana Carter just sounds so goshdarn EARNEST as she sings it!

Updated On: 6/23/08 at 02:32 PM

[suicidalmickeymouse]

Posted: 6/23/08 at 3:22pm

From "For Good"

And just to clear the air
I ask forgiveness
For the things I've done you blame me for


What's that supposed to mean?

[TooDarnHot]

Posted: 6/23/08 at 3:47pm

Weez - Wildhorn is disliked by MANY composers. He writes terrible lyrics, uses ridiculous syntax, and breaks many rhyming rules.

[playbills]

Posted: 6/23/08 at 4:02pm

suicidalmickeymouse, what do you mean by "What's that supposed to mean?" The lyrics are pretty straightforward. "For" is mean to rhyme with "anymore" in the next line "And none of it seems to matter anymore." It might not be Schwartz best work, but I don't see anything wrong with it.

I have to agree with the OP, some of Spring Awakening's lyrics sound pretty but just don't rhyme.

[myshikobit]

Posted: 6/23/08 at 5:58pm

So the worst song I have EVER heard in a show is from a 1960's flop called "Kelly", called "Ode To The Brooklyn Bridge. I can't find the lyrics because it's really obscure, and I'm not listening to it again to find them out. I know some lyrics that make me cringe in songs I like, but I can't remember any right now.

[B3TA07]

Posted: 6/23/08 at 6:02pm

"it was so easy to make it rhyme...but they did not."

They didn't on purpose. I can't remember where but there's an interview with Herbert K. (or someone..?) and he talks specifically about that lyric. I think it's beautiful that it doesn't rhyme, with or without having the explanation to put it in perspective.

[jacobtsf]

Posted: 6/23/08 at 6:46pm

TooDarnHot- Wildhorn does NOT write lyrics. People dislike his SHOWS and his collaborators. Those who dislike HIS work are disliking the music.

[goofy108]

Posted: 6/23/08 at 6:52pm

there just like the couple from titanic, only no one dies...

-legally blonde

[Mattbrain]

Posted: 6/23/08 at 7:22pm

Boy, this itches. Wonder who gave it to me. Probably those lyrics from that musical. Last time I do someone a favor. Oh my God, can people hear me! Ba-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da!

Anyone remember that from Family Guy?

[little_sally]

Posted: 6/23/08 at 7:28pm

There was a terrible one that I remember from "Cry-Baby" (not sure which song) but the final line was something like, "put me in your register under Baby comma Cry". It was the first time I remember literally groaning while watching a show.

[Sabina]

Posted: 6/23/08 at 7:55pm

From Wicked:
"Nessa, uh, Nessa? I've got something to confess-
A reason why, well, why I asked you here tonight."
I know he's saying "to confess/A reason," but it sounds like he's rhyming Nessa with "confessa," which drives me crazy every time.
In Working, the cashier sings
"Every time I PLU-it
For the flowers or the fruit", with "fruit" pronounced "froo-it"...it drives me nuts! :)

[[tos]fan999]

Posted: 6/24/08 at 12:58am

"We have ways of making you vote for us, or at least from making you abstain."
-Evita, A New Argentina


Those lyrics just seem totally random and interrupt the flow of the song. I understand them, but they just bother me so much.

[TooDarnHot]

Posted: 6/24/08 at 1:29am

jacob - wrong! he wrote A LOT of additional lyrics for both "Jekyll & Hyde" and "Victor/Victoria"

[musicaltheatrefan3]

Posted: 6/24/08 at 1:35am

525,600 minutes
525,000 moments so dear

oh, so 600 of those minutes aren't dear? Or is there a difference between moments and minutes? Are moments longer? What's the conversion rate? It bothers me every time that they say 525,000! but I still love the song and the show!

[A Fleur De Toi]

Posted: 6/24/08 at 12:27pm

A lot of the lyrics in Rent are pretty tosh - I think one was particularly bad - the "I'll take the call, I hate the fall" one. Oh God. grimace grimace.

and Wicked, dont get me started. I simply cannot stand those witch hunter songs or the "bridges you cross you didnt know you crossed until you crossed."

ARGH.

I like them both though, dont get me wrong :)