Anyone wanna read a deppressing story about HIV that I wrote for a scholarship?

[Cruel_Sandwich]

Posted: 11/23/05 at 12:01am

Enjoy!

BEST FRIENDS by Jeremy Moran

Shaun and I have been best friends for years. We have been through so much together; the good times and the bad. We walk together, we eat together, and we feel together. We are inseparable. Our paths have been intertwined for so long that nothing could even begin to untangle them. That is not to say, however, that our relationship has always been easy. There are days when he throws tantrums, the days when he cries, the days when I make his life a living hell, the days he wants to kill me and the days when he wants to kill himself. Yet, for lack of a better term, we are stuck with one another. The only thing that can ever slash us apart would be the sharpest end of our mortal coil.
I met Shaun at a party when he was 19. With overliquored, oversexed individuals awash in a sea of drugs, it was a sordidly perfect good time. Each room of the house offered its own surprise. Walk into the kitchen and you could find Cheryl snorting cocaine off of the breakfast table. Creep into the upstairs bedroom and you could find Nate and Rachel going at it under the covers. Knock on the downstairs bathroom door and you could find me.
I was there with Dex, a tall, angular man who would be considered handsome if it were not for the rather noticeable infected holes and splotches all over his body. That didn’t seem to deter him from shooting up with some of the most saliva caked, blood stained, dirt residing, disease infested, and just plain grossest looking needles I’ve ever seen in my life. Yet they seemed to entertain him and I was powerless to do anything. After all, I was also stuck with this man.
Shaun had been on a bit of a bender by the time he had walked in on the two of us. This scholarship-owning football star had already had his mind bent by pills, tablets, coke, acid and enough alcohol to tranquilize a horse. Yet, being the robust, muscular specimen that he was, he knew he was not down for the count yet. He had heard rumors that somewhere in the house lurked heroin, a drug he had heard worked wonders for the mind and body. Stumbling into the bathroom to find his buddy Dex and I in the bathtub preparing to shoot up, he had found the jackpot.
That’s when he met me.
At first, I knew more about him than Shaun did about me. He paid me absolutely no mind in those days that followed the party. Sure, he had a fever, but he just attributed that to the seasonal change. Sure, he felt tired and worn out all day, but he just attributed that to the night sweats. It was just a case of the flu, brought about by summer’s change to autumn, he steadfastly believed. He would get better soon.
All of that was just a hazy memory by the time the scorching days of summer came. With high school graduation behind him and college looming ahead, he was on the pathway to a bright future. He didn’t have time to worry about the flu he had a few weeks ago. He didn’t have time to worry about me.
It was around this time when he started getting pretty serious with his girlfriend, Suzy. She was a strikingly attractive woman, with a personality that could bring light into even the darkest corner. They would go to movies together, they would go to museums together, they would go to the park together, they would eat together, and they would laugh together. There was never a moment where their thoughts were far from each other. Each day spent with her fired Shaun’s passion further. He was absolutely convinced that they were made for each other. This relatively sped up the process of a typical date between them progressing from dinner and a movie to wild nights of passionate sex.
The dreaded day of finally shipping off to different colleges was creeping nearer and nearer. Neither could fathom a week without each other, much less an entire semester. Sure they would be able to talk to each other by phone but it would not be the same. Nevertheless, it was just something they would have to get used to. They solemnly went about their preparations. Shaun packed up all of his belongings. Suzy tore down the posters on her wall. Shaun said goodbye to friends. Suzy cut her hair. Shaun researched his professors. Suzy threw a going away party. Shaun cut his hair. Suzy packed up her belongings. All that was left for Shaun was to get a physical, in accordance with the rules of the university’s football team.
All it took were a few boils for Shaun to be immediately sent to a rapid testing facility. All it took was 20 minutes for the doctors to utter those life-changing words. All it took was a little lightheadedness that grew into a full-blown panic attack to knock Shaun out.
Hello Shaun, nice to meet you.

[Cruel_Sandwich]

Posted: 11/23/05 at 12:01am

The days that followed were filled with intense paranoia, loathing, and confusion. “Why did I get this?” “What happened?” “Why do I deserve this?” Shaun was locked up in an isolated box of shame. He could not bear to admit it to himself, much less tell his parents. His extent of knowledge on the subject was limited to RENT, Angels in America, and a movie starring Tom Hanks. In his mind, it was regarded as the Bubonic Plague for the information generation. When he wasn’t hating himself for willingly causing his downfall, he was hating himself for hating himself. “Why am I crying? I have to be strong.” He had to tell somebody but whom? Surely not his parents, who would have a collective nervous breakdown if they found out that their son was on a path towards death. Surely not his friends, who would incessantly mock him for getting infected with “the gay disease”. Surely not Suz…Oh God.
That late night telephone call was the hardest thing Shaun ever had to get through, coming after Shaun had slowly gathered up the courage to tell his parents and a select group of friends. His fingers shook so much that it took nearly 15 minutes to dial the number. Each ring just made Shaun’s body grow colder and colder.
“Hello?”
Shaun gulped.
“Suzy…there’s something I have to tell you…”
Shaun felt as if he had a boulder the size of the Grand Canyon in his throat as he struggled through the words. His tears, abrupt pauses, and nervous coughs were met with a long silence, a short quivering sound, and then finally the crash of the phone against the receiver. Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep.
Five minutes later, the phone rang.
“ARE YOU SERIOUS?!?!”
At first she was absolutely livid. She tossed every insult she could straight into Shaun’s heart and it hurt. Bad. After about 10 minutes she was distracted by a bizarre sound. Was that Shaun crying? She immediately looked at herself and realized that she was accomplishing nothing. It was at that precise moment when she and Shaun shared a good, long cry together that soon gave way to “I love you”s that soon gave way to a six hour telephone conversation that covered the entire spectrum of their concerns and ultimately ended with not only Suzy’s vow of loyal support through this ordeal, but also her promise to get tested herself.
A few days later, another phone call came.
Hello Suzy, nice to meet you.

[Cruel_Sandwich]

Posted: 11/23/05 at 12:02am

This time they were armed with better information. Shaun had been attending a weekly support group, began seeing a therapist, and devoted all of his free time towards better understanding exactly what it was that he had. He discovered that living with me was not a death sentence. He met many of my other friends; people who had known me for decades. He met among them successful bankers, actors, lawyers, dentists, doctors, Christians, Jews, Muslims, Atheists, Agnostics, Buddhists, blacks, whites, Latinos, husbands, wives, lovers, friends, and everything in between.
The years went by. Shaun and Suzy both graduated with degrees in hand. Now they were ready to go out into the world and make something of themselves. Suzy went on to law school while Shaun went into a field near and dear to his heart: Education. Becoming a high school teacher allowed him to reach out to those who were dealing with the sort of problems that Shaun knew how to overcome. It did not take long at all for him to become the most popular teacher in the school, with students regularly dropping by to ask for his advice for some of the most difficult issues in their lives.
One day, he noticed a young man in the fifth row shaking, panting, and wiping away tears conspicuously so that none of his friends could see. Once the bell rang, he walked over to the troubled student and asked him if he was alright.
“Well…I just got some horrible, horrible news.”
Shaun felt more in touch with this student than he did with any other. The agony, the sheer horror, the despair. Shaun knew what they all felt like. He counseled him through the diagnosis, through the treatments, and encouraged him to follow his dreams. That student was just one piece of a mosaic of young lives that Shaun and Suzy were able to touch. Their desire to give to young people the sort of education about me that they themselves lacked at their age finally answered the question that they had asked at the very beginning of our friendship: “Why?”
My friendship with Shaun and Suzy is one that continues to this day. They have lived full, long lives despite my presence due to their determination, their spirit, and their willingness to succeed. They have realized that the best way to deal with my presence is to know me, accept me, and, through education, let others know about me. Their lives are a tribute to the fact that my friendship with anyone is not an automatic death sentence. It’s all due to the fact that they have focused more on living and less on dying. HIV should not be something to deter one from following their dreams.

[Elphaba]

Posted: 11/23/05 at 10:02am

I'll PM my thoughts

[SweetQintheLights]

Posted: 11/23/05 at 8:07pm

:::Speechless:::

WoW! What a story!!

Can I just ask if you got an "A" for it? It is wonderfully written and very touching!