I'm Having An Awful And Dreadful Time, And I Seek Some Advice

I went to a small Catholic school for 9 years. One classroom for each grade level and about 20 students in each class. My freshman year in high school a kid (Brad) who had been in my class all 9 years died from an asthma attack in his sleep. We were a close class. I feel for you and will keep you in my prayers. I know its hard right now to see, but this will make you a stronger person in the end if you let it. Right now just concentrate on the mourning. It is very important and don't be afraid to let your feelings out. Brad is one of the inspirations for who I have become today. Remember the good times and cry if you feel like it, and be supportive to all his family and your friends. Let your friends know that even if they might not seem to want to be together now, that if they ever want to call or come over and hang out or just talk, that you are there. You should also tell them that you need company if you haven't told them already. Don't just say, "Hey wanna come over?" say, "I really need to talk and be with people right now."I Once again, I am sorry for your loss.

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Updated On: 2/4/04 at 07:24 PM

I feel for you, Bud. If you feel the need to get a load off your chest, don't be afraid to PM me.

Hang in there--and say a few prayers.

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I'm so sorry to hear about your friend. I went to a small school, and several people died while I attended. Though it won't take the pain away, maybe one thing you could do is something to keep his memory alive. Maybe an annual sports competition in his name (donate any proceedings to a scholarship fund) or something as simple as a memory book. I hope these ideas help, and will be thinking of you.

Time does heal. It doesn't diminish your feelings or your loss but with time you will continue on. I do believe that the good do die young. Maybe their lives are meant to be an example. I don't know.

I just lost an old friend that I hadn't talked to in years. The day he died he had just started a new job returning to my department. We talked and laughed on the phone that afternoon. He died that night. While I can't make sense of it, I know he died a happy person.

Don't be afraid to tell his family all the positive things you have to say. Any antidotes that come to mind. That's something that, when they're able to absorb it, they'll enjoy and welcome hearing. It may also be helpful to you.

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Thank you all for these wonderful messages. They really helped a lot! Last night, I calmed down and went to a friends house, and it was nice and we chatted and laughed. It was a nice way to end such a terrible day. We decided we are making a quilt, and will pass out patches individually at school so people can sign them and put whatever they want on it, then give it to his parents.

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I just wanted to let everyone know that I am doing much better. Being around people has really helped me through this, but I would also like to share an amazing experience that I had last night with you.

After returning home from a Shakespeare workshop, I collapsed in my bed at 10 PM and cried for a bit. Then, I began to pray. Soon, it turned into me talking to Mathias. I told him we all missed him, and how wonderful he was. My last words were, "I love you Mathias."

The second I said those words, my alarm clock went off. I turned on my light and shut it off. I figured I had just set it to a werid time last weekend, because I'm always taking naps in the afternoon and setting my alarm to wake me up at night. Well, I checked the alarm set - and it was set for 7 AM, which is when I get up for school. I have no other explanation.

I feel like it was a sign of some sort. Perhaps he was saying its time to let go, or he was responding. But it was lovely.

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