Is That You In Your Avatar? NINE to five(000) Rated R - take 2- Page 29

[wonderfulwizard11]

Posted: 8/12/07 at 2:50am

Stagey, I would rather adopt an older child.

[StageManager2]

Posted: 8/12/07 at 2:53am

Good for you, wiz! Just beware that an older child can come with a lot of baggage, which is why many tend to favor infants. I was 8 when I was adopted and the transition (new country, new language, new family, etc.) was difficult to say the least.

[tazber]

Posted: 8/12/07 at 2:53am

I kinda want to adopt, but not without a partner. And I want to have been with a partner for a few years before anyway.

[StageManager2]

Posted: 8/12/07 at 2:58am

I've said that if I were to have children I'd much rather adopt -- and not just because I'm altruistic; I don't want to curse any child with my terrible genes.

[wonderfulwizard11]

Posted: 8/12/07 at 2:59am

That's true stagey.

But I think adpoting any child can come with baggage.

[tazber]

Posted: 8/12/07 at 3:01am

What do you mean Wiz?
I didn't think you really had a choice.

[DG]

Posted: 8/12/07 at 3:02am

"I don't want to curse any child with my terrible genes"

*sigh*

SM2 - this is not an unusual statement for you. It makes me sad, and I can only hope that, if it's truly how you feel, you find some path to make you happy.

[tazber]

Posted: 8/12/07 at 3:04am

disregard my previous post, I mis-read your meaning Wiz. I think.

[wonderfulwizard11]

Posted: 8/12/07 at 3:05am

I think, when adopting any child (save for small infants) it might be hard adjusting to a new environment.

I could be quite wrong though.

[DG]

Posted: 8/12/07 at 3:15am

WW - I think you're quite right, actually. The longer we're around on this rock, the more we become encoded with what we've experienced. And older adoptee most certainly will come with the experiences they've already had - and many of them are, shall we say, less than pleasant. But, they're frequently the ones who need the love and nurturing the most - no matter the added difficulty to the sacrifice.

[tazber]

Posted: 8/12/07 at 3:17am

It's so sad that the older children are the least wanted.

[DG]

Posted: 8/12/07 at 3:20am

A particular sadness to me is that many of those older children have been identified as gay, which is why they're still in the system. AND YET, they won't let them go to a gay couple who wants to adopt - and could provide REAL support necessary for their growth - because, as we all know, they'd only become a sex toy.

I'm getting too worked up by the discussions this evening!

[wonderfulwizard11]

Posted: 8/12/07 at 3:23am

I've always found I'd rather adopt an older child than a younger one.

[tazber]

Posted: 8/12/07 at 3:25am

Well, this is a discussion worthy of getting worked up over. When I was at NYU, Tisch is right across the street from the Hetrick Martin Institute and I would always see those kids hanging around. You could just tell they were craving attention and love.

[wonderfulwizard11]

Posted: 8/12/07 at 3:26am

DG, I never even realized that. It WOULD be such a great help if gay couples could adopt gay youth who've been thrown out.

Of course, it's a shame to begin with that teenagers - people my age - are thrown out because they are gay. But that's a whole 'nother issue.

[DG]

Posted: 8/12/07 at 3:30am

Since I've been posting in this thread more often of late - hey, you guys are the ones playing! - I thought it only fair to make my av one of me.

And the horns may LOOK drawn on, but they're real

[tazber]

Posted: 8/12/07 at 3:30am

oh yea, that is a whole other issue. And in many ways a much more severe one as many homeless teens end up as prostitutes. And rarely recover their lives after that. Just for being gay.

[tazber]

Posted: 8/12/07 at 3:31am

Not to interrupt the conversation but DG = hottie!!

[wonderfulwizard11]

Posted: 8/12/07 at 3:32am

I *knew* you had horns DG!

[DG]

Posted: 8/12/07 at 3:33am

Taz - you DO have a Daddy fixation!

As much scorn as QUEER AS FOLK received, I did have to give them credit for at least attempting to address that issue (gay youth on the streets.)

[wonderfulwizard11]

Posted: 8/12/07 at 3:34am

I've never seen Queer as Folk (though I've heard the British version was MUCH better) but that is good of them to adress such an issue. Especially because it's not really talked about in the mainstream.

[tazber]

Posted: 8/12/07 at 3:35am

my post was woefully simplistic in it's assessment of being a homeless teen, but it is a significant problem. And a heartbreaking one.

[StageManager2]

Posted: 8/12/07 at 3:36am

"But, they're frequently the ones who need the love and nurturing the most - no matter the added difficulty to the sacrifice."

That's very admirable of you, DG. I was only in the orphanage for two years (thank God!), but there were older kids who'd been there for years, some even as infants. And then there were the kids who came of age and were no longer available for adoption.

[tazber]

Posted: 8/12/07 at 3:36am

And I don't think I have a daddy complex DG, you're just good looking.

[StageManager2]

Posted: 8/12/07 at 3:38am

taz, would you say DG is "cute" or "adorable"?