THE DARK KNIGHT Causes Deep Introspection
by Julian Craster
AP July 21. As the film THE DARK KNIGHT sets attendance records around the world, there have been confirmed reports of the film's chief side-effect: deep introspection and profound meditation on the nature of evil.
"My boy Cruel just won't come out of his room," said Mrs. Edna Sandwich, 60, of Horner's Corners. "He saw THE DARK KNIGHT and has started reading this Nietzsche person, and won't discuss anything but evil and its place in the universe. He used his allowance to paint his room black."
A non-profit organization has been set up to combat the effects of the film. Known as GLAD (GLoom And Doom) Warriors, they are scheduling site visits and interventions for the serioiusly DK-influenced. "We just want to remind folks that there's life after THE DARK KNIGHT," said GLAD Warriors CEO Dr. Karl Jaquith. "We recommend pipes. Messy things, pipes. I like em."
"If they can get you asking the wrong questions, they don't have to worry about the answers." Thomas Pynchon, GRAVITY'S RAINBOW
"Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away." Philip K. Dick
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