MONDAY MORNING CHUCKLE
#0MONDAY MORNING CHUCKLE
Posted: 8/8/05 at 5:07am
Dear Employees:
It has been brought to management's attention that some individuals throughout the department have been using foul language during the course of normal conversation with their co-workers.
Due to complaints received from some employees who may be easily offended,this type of language will no longer be tolerated.
We do, however, realize the critical importance of being able to accurately express your feelings when communicating with co-workers.
Therefore a list of 18 New and Innovative "TRY SAYING" phrases have been provided so that proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in an effective manner.
1) TRY SAYING: I think you could use more training. INSTEAD OF: You don't know what the f___ you're doing.
2) TRY SAYING: She's an aggressive go-getter. INSTEAD OF: She's a ball-busting b__ch.
3) TRY SAYING: Perhaps I can work late. INSTEAD OF: And when the f___ do you expect me to do this?
4) TRY SAYING: I don't think that this is feasible. INSTEAD OF: No f______ way.
5) TRY SAYING: Really? INSTEAD OF: You've got to be sh__ing me!
6) TRY SAYING: Perhaps you should check with... INSTEAD OF: Tell someone who gives a sh__.
7) TRY SAYING: I wasn't involved in the project. INSTEAD OF: It's not my f______ problem.
TRY SAYING: That's interesting. INSTEAD OF: What the f___?
9) TRY SAYING: I'm not sure this can be implemented. INSTEAD OF: This sh__ won't work.
10) TRY SAYING: I'll try to schedule that. INSTEAD OF: Why the h___ didn't you tell me sooner?
11) TRY SAYING: He's not familiar with the issues. INSTEAD OF: He's got his head up his a__
12) TRY SAYING: I beg your pardon, sir? INSTEAD OF: Eat sh__ and die.
13) TRY SAYING: I'm sorry that my response didn't please you. INSTEAD OF: Kiss my a__.
14) TRY SAYING: I'm a bit overloaded at the moment. INSTEAD OF: F___ it, I'm on salary.
15) TRY SAYING: I don't think you understand. INSTEAD OF: Shove it up your a__.
16) TRY SAYING: I love a challenge. INSTEAD OF: This job sucks.
17) TRY SAYING: Say, I should have thought of that myself. INSTEAD OF: Who the f___ died and made you boss?
18 ) TRY SAYING: He's somewhat insensitive. INSTEAD OF: He's a pr_ck.
Thank You,
Human Resources
#1re: MONDAY MORNING CHUCKLE
Posted: 8/8/05 at 7:10amHAHA, thanks for that :0)
ashley0139
Broadway Legend Joined: 1/3/05
#2re: MONDAY MORNING CHUCKLE
Posted: 8/8/05 at 8:34amHehe. I like those.
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