MONDAY MORNING CHUCKLE
MONDAY MORNING CHUCKLE
#1MONDAY MORNING CHUCKLE
Posted: 4/23/07 at 5:08am
Does Management know their Staff?
On walking into the factory, the MD noticed a young guy leaning against the wall, doing nothing.
He approached the young man and calmly said to him, "How much do you earn?"
The young man was quite amazed that he was asked such a personal question, he replied, none the less, "I earn $ 2 000.00 a month, Sir. Why?"
Without answering, the MD took out his wallet and removed $6000.00 cash and gave it to the young man and said, "Around here I pay people for working, not for standing around looking pretty! Here is your 3 months salary, now GET OUT and don't come back".
The young man turned around and was quickly out of sight.
Noticing a few onlookers, the MD said in a very upset manner, "And that applies for everybody in this company".
He approached one of the onlookers and asked him, "Who's the young man that I just fired?"
To which an amazing reply came of, "He was the pizza delivery man, Sir...!!"
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An Italian man wants a job, but the foreman won't hire him until he Passes a little math test.
"Here's your first question," the foreman said. "Without using numbers, Represent the number 9."
"Without numbers?" the Italian says, "Datsa easy." And he proceeds to Draw three trees.
"What's this?" the boss asks.
"Ave you got no brain? Tree and tree and tree makea nine," says the Italian.
"Fair enough," says the boss. "Here's your second question. Use the Same rules, but this time the number is 99."
The Italian stares into space for a while, then picks up the picture That he has just drawn and makes a smudge on each tree. "Ere a you go."
The boss scratches his head and says, "How on earth do you get that to Represent 99?"
"Each of da trees is a dirty now. So, it's dirty tree, and dirty tree,And dirty tree. Dat is 99."
The boss is getting worried that he's going to actually have to hire This Italian, so he says, "All right, last question. Same rules again, But represent the number 100."
The Italian stares into space some more, then he picks up the picture Again and makes a little mark at the base of each tree and says, "Ere You go. One hundred."
The boss looks at the attempt. "You must be nuts if you think that Represents a hundred!"
(You're going to love this one!!!)
The Italian leans forward and points to the marks at the base of each Tree and says, "A little doga came along and crapa by eacha tree. So Now you gota dirty tree and a turd, dirty tree and a turd, and dirty Tree and a turd, datsa makea one hundred. So, when I'm a gonna start?"
"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
#2re: MONDAY MORNING CHUCKLE
Posted: 4/23/07 at 7:18amI love it!
"All the while making faces like a baby platypus who forget to take some Beano before eating a chimichanga." FindingNamo in reference to Jessica Simpson's singing.
MatthewAddison
Broadway Legend Joined: 2/10/04
#3re: MONDAY MORNING CHUCKLE
Posted: 4/23/07 at 10:11am
This was my mental image on the Italian one.
:)
#4re: MONDAY MORNING CHUCKLE
Posted: 4/23/07 at 10:25am
Hahaha. Thanks for brightening up my day, Boobs. 
One time, Patti LuPone punched me in the face...
It was awesome. - theaterkid1015
It was awesome. - theaterkid1015
tommyboy
Broadway Star Joined: 12/21/06
#5re: MONDAY MORNING CHUCKLE
Posted: 4/23/07 at 2:13pm
Oh Boobsie -- this reminds me of one your best -- the one about Mujibar and the 3 colors, green pink and yellow. I think it merits a rerun.
gumbo2
Broadway Legend Joined: 8/21/05
#6re: MONDAY MORNING CHUCKLE
Posted: 4/23/07 at 2:17pmOh those crafy Italians and their accents...those were pretty good.
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