SATURDAY EVENING CHUCKLE

[Broadwayboobs]

Posted: 2/5/05 at 9:03pm

30 Lines to make you smile today.


1.. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't.


2.. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.


3.. I Work Hard Because Millions On Welfare Depend on Me!


4.. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them. (SO TRUE)


5.. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.


6.. Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.


7.. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.


8.. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.


9.. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.


10.. I'm not a complete idiot --Some parts are missing.


11.. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.


12. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine.


13.. God must love stupid people; He made so many.


14.. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.


15.. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.


16.. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?


17.. Being "over the hill" is much better than being under it!


18.. Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up


19.. Procrastinate Now!


20.. I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries With That?


21.. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.


22.. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.


23.. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!


24.. They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.


25.. He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless dead.


26.. A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory.


27.. Ham and eggs. A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime
commitment for a pig.


28.. The trouble with life is there's no background music.


29.. The original point and click interface was a Smith and Wesson.


30.. I smile because I don't know what is going on.

[Caroline-Q-or-TBoo]

Posted: 2/5/05 at 9:11pm

i needed that, thanks a lot Boobs!

[Liam]

Posted: 2/5/05 at 9:27pm

thats one of my all times favorite thank you!

[Allie]

Posted: 2/5/05 at 9:48pm

Haha, these kind of remind me of my dad's favourite saying:

Help stamp-out, abolish, and get rid of redundancy!

[Winokur_fan]

Posted: 2/5/05 at 9:56pm

Here's my favorite saying, "Just remember...if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off!" (For those who don't understand it, think gravity.

[mominator]

Posted: 2/5/05 at 10:34pm

Thanks BB. Needed the giggle tonight (doing the taxes!!)

[liotte]

Posted: 2/5/05 at 10:37pm

Thanks for the much needed smile!

[zippyjen]

Posted: 2/5/05 at 10:38pm

I also needed a smile on my face so thanks!

[bdwaygirl]

Posted: 2/5/05 at 10:50pm

Love it!