TUESDAY MORNING CHUCKLE
TUESDAY MORNING CHUCKLE
#0TUESDAY MORNING CHUCKLE
Posted: 8/8/06 at 5:01am
A man's walking home late at night when he sees a woman in the shadows.
"Twenty bucks," she says.
He'd never been with a woman like this before, but he decides what the heck it's only twenty bucks.
They're getting friendly for a minute when all of a sudden a light flashes on them it's a police officer.
"What's going on here, people?" asks the officer.
"I'm making love to my wife," the man answers indignantly.
"Oh, I'm sorry," says the cop, "I didn't know."
"Well," said the man, "neither did I until you shined that light in her face."
"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
#1re: TUESDAY MORNING CHUCKLE
Posted: 8/8/06 at 5:05amNow that's what I call getting caught red handed.
#3Computer Test
Posted: 8/8/06 at 7:13am
>> Jesus and Satan were having an ongoing argument about who was
>> better on the computer. They had been going at it for days,
and
>> frankly God was tired of hearing all the bickering.
>>
>> Finally fed up, God said, "THAT'S IT! I have had enough. I am
going
>> to set up a test that will run for two hours, and from those
results, I
>> will judge who does the better job."
>>
>> So Satan and Jesus sat down at the keyboards and typed away.
>>
>> They moused.
>>
>> They faxed.
>>
>> They e-mailed.
>>
>> They e-mailed with attachments.
>>
>> They downloaded.
>>
>> They did spreadsheets!
>>
>> They wrote reports.
>>
>> They created labels and cards.
>>
>> They created charts and graphs.
>>
>> They did some genealogy reports
>>
>> They did every job known to man.
>>
>> Jesus worked with heavenly efficiency, and Satan was faster
than hell.
>>
>> Then, ten minutes before their time was up, lightning
suddenly flashed
>> across the sky, thunder rolled, rain poured, and, of course,
the power
>> went off.
>>
>> Satan stared at his blank screen and screamed every curse
word
>> known in the underworld.
>>
>> Jesus just sighed.
>>
>> Finally the electricity came back on, and each of them
restarted their
>> computers.
>>
>> Satan started searching frantically, screaming: "It's gone!
It's
>> all GONE! I lost everything when the power went out!"
>>
>> Meanwhile, Jesus quietly started printing out all of his
files from
>> the past two hours of work.
>>
>> Satan observed this and became irate.
>>
>> "Wait!" he screamed. "That's not fair! He cheated! How come
he has
>> all his work and I don't have any?"
>>
>> God just shrugged and said,
>>
>> JESUS SAVES
>>
"I don't really get the ending,all i can go with is when after several months,Judith saw Pat sang,and later she kissed him on the toilet,after that the story back to where Pat went down from the stage after he'd sung,and he went to the italian lady.I just don't get it,what Judith exatcly meant when he kissed Pat that she had seen,and did Pat end up together with The Italian Lady?Please help me,thank u very much!"
Quote from someone on IMDB in reference to a movie he/she didn't understand. Such grammar!
#4Computer Test
Posted: 8/8/06 at 7:27amBoth are good, but I love the Jesus Saves one!
"You know, with the right volume, Patti LuPone can make a car bounce, too...."
-Wonderwaiter
matt schneider
Broadway Star Joined: 7/3/06
#5Computer Test
Posted: 8/9/06 at 12:58amgreat, hilarious, and the type of humor I love.
The bushes of Tex were nervous recks because their son was dim, But look what happened to him~Dirrty Rotten Scoundrels~all about Ruprecht
They say the thoughtful musicals dead on broadway~forbiden broadway : SVU~The crime scene
Never say never, there's always one more person you can hit up~avenue Q.~the money song
Life sucks, get a pacifyer~my own saying
#6Computer Test
Posted: 8/9/06 at 7:26am
Yes, yes. Jesus saves. But Moses invests 
"You can only become truly accomplished at something you love. Don't make money your goal. Instead, pursue the things you love doing, and do them so well that people can't take their eyes off you."
- Maya Angelou
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