The Evil that is a bird called Sparrow- Off Topic vent!

[justme2]

Posted: 5/31/05 at 5:00pm

WEEK 1
How cute, there is a nest of birds in my bedroom wall. I can hear the adorable little baby birds peeping in the morning. Awww...look at the mother bird watching me from the roofline.

WEEK 2
Those cute little babies, they are growing fast and always hungry. Their little peeps can be heard at dawn and at dusk. The parental birds are always perched at the roofline, watching out for danger.

WEEK 3
I wonder how long baby birds stay in the nest? How many times a day do they really need to eat? There's the father bird again, swooping down from the roof to make sure his babies are safe.

WEEK 4
Seriously, how long do these birds have to stay in the nest? Why is the mother bird staring at me all the time?

WEEK 5
The internet tells me these are "house sparrows" and they are a common problem as they nest in walls and have 4-5 broods a year. Hmmmm...

WEEK 6
Damn "baby" birds...aren't they teenagers yet? When the hell are those lazy a** bird parents going to teach those things to fly, already? That's right bird b****ch, stare at me some more!!!

WEEK 7
No good, loud a**, lazy a** birds, get the hell out of the nest and fly away already!! If I hear one more "peep" at 5am, there's gonna be some anthrax pumped into the wall!!


DISCLAIMER: No birds have been harmed. Nor will they be. Any ideas on how to get them out of the wall, though?

[My Fair Lady]

Posted: 5/31/05 at 5:01pm

All I can say is, that really sucks. I'm having a case of shadenfreude!

[CostumeMistress]

Posted: 5/31/05 at 5:04pm

Awww, no ideas.

Me, I was thrilled that the apartment I moved into had a huge, beautiful tree outside the window. That is, until chipmunks started crawling onto my outside window ledge right off the branch and tapping at my window at 5am.

[justme2]

Posted: 5/31/05 at 5:22pm

Yeah...I felt all "isn't nature great?" until week 5 or 6, when the constant, insistent, shrill peeping started to grate on me.

[Elphaba]

Posted: 5/31/05 at 5:25pm

just me, you write well...that was hilarious. I used to have a squirrel.......(I HATE squirrels) who would come into my home in Chicago if I left the window open......damn thing thought he owned the place......
I also had pest problems in San Francisco, but I realized by feeding a neighbors cat, he'd "fix" things. Sadly, "fixed" things were often left on my doorstep.....

[CostumeMistress]

Posted: 5/31/05 at 5:30pm

Justme, I'll swap you chipmunk recipes for sparrow recipes.



(DISCLAIMER: for all you PETA folks, I'm *kidding,* I do love animals, I just love them more during normal daylight hours.)

[justme2]

Posted: 5/31/05 at 5:34pm

Sparrow Fricasse...delightful with a bitter sauce.

[CostumeMistress]

Posted: 5/31/05 at 5:56pm

Chipmunk Chutney.

[justme2]

Posted: 5/31/05 at 6:12pm

Ha Ha HA!

I feel terrible hating such small, furry little creatures. But really, when the wall sparrows are peeping and the parental sparrows are sitting outside the window screeching, and it's only 5am, it's like Hell in stereo!!

anyway...
Sparrow Stew, with just a hint of rage....I mean sage.

[CostumeMistress]

Posted: 5/31/05 at 6:18pm

Delish.

[AbbaRabbit]

Posted: 5/31/05 at 6:18pm

Get a cat. lol.

[Foxxy]

Posted: 5/31/05 at 6:33pm

Justme, your good at writing, and I have to agree with My Fair Lady about Shadenfreude!!!!

[justme2]

Posted: 5/31/05 at 9:36pm

Thank you both for enjoying my misery (lol)...I am home again and the little f****rs.....I mean darlings.....are at it right now.