#1
Posted: 8/15/07 at 8:26pm
As we bid farewell to Turd Blossom, let's take one last look at his notable life.
Karl's biological father abandoned his family when Karl was quite young and he was adopted by his Mom's new husband Louis Rove. Karl didn't know until much later in life that Louis wasn't his biological father and has spoken about his stepfather's "Selfless" love for raising Karl & his brother as his own. Sadly, Louis left his family fairly late in life and lived out his days as an out homosexual. His admiration for his Stepfather didn't stop Karl from demonizing gays at every turn, apparently.
Like many men in his generation, Karl lived through the Vietnam era. His draft number was a middle-of-the-pack 84. (1 to 195 were eventually called.) Karl, a Young Republican, was a staunch supporter of the war, but that didn't stop him for filing for repeated student deferments, even after he dropped out of college. He eventually was ruled 1A (eligible to be drafted) but managed to evade it till the draft ended in 1973. Unlike say John Kerry, who OPPOSED the war, but felt obligated to serve, Karl didn't enlist.
Karl dropped out to persue his interest in politics. In the fall of 1970, Karl snuck into the campaign office of Democrat Alan J. Dixon, who was running for Illinois State Treasurer, and stole 1000 sheets of paper with campaign letterhead. Rove then printed fake campaign rally fliers promising "free beer, free food, girls and a good time for nothing", and distributed them at rock concerts and homeless shelters, with the effect of disrupting Dixon's rally. Twenty-nine years later Karl admitted to the "dirty trick" and said he "regreted" it- most likely he regreted that Dixon still Crushed Karl's candidate, despite the stunt.
Lee Atwater ran Karl's first campaign, a run for the head of the US Young Republicans. It was a pairing that seemed made in, uh- heaven. Perhaps it's more accurate to say that Atwater, long hailed as the most morally bankrupt man to serve in politics, ever- served as a mentor to Karl. Atwater was Satan to Rove's Lucifer, as it were.
After just narrowly missing going down in flames for his involvement in Republican Dirty tricks during the Watergate era, Karl found a new Mentor in George HW Bush. While serving as Bush's "Special Assistant" Karl was sent on an errand to deliver a set of Car Keys to his son GW Bush. It was quite literally, love at first sight: Karl's actaul quote on the moment? "Huge amounts of charisma, swagger, cowboy boots, flight jacket, wonderful smile, just charisma - you know, wow"
Like most of the "Family values" set, Karl has two families: He & his first wife divorced in 1980 and he remarried in 1986. His only degree is an honorary one from Jerry Falwell’s Liberty Baptist University.
Like his Minion Ann Coulter, Karl has a history of voting where he doesn't live. In 2005 he was investigated for registering to vote in Texas despite having no residence there. He & his wife divided their time between a mansion in DC and a million-dollar winter home in Florida.
Karl's poltical clients are a who's who of thoroughly despicable human beings: Rick ("Good Hair") Parry, Kay Bailey Hutchinson, Richard Thornburgh, John Ashcroft and of course, his boyhood crush, George W Bush.
With a career like that, what will Karl be best rememebred for? Will it be his dazzling response to Hurricane Katrina? Will it be his compassion in the days following 9/11 when he urged capitalizing on it politically and said "liberals saw the savagery of the 9/11 attacks and wanted to prepare indictments and offer therapy and understanding for our attackers"? Or will it be his role in outing a CIA agent in wartime for political gain? Or perhaps his greatest triumph lies ahead? God, I hope not.
Karl's biological father abandoned his family when Karl was quite young and he was adopted by his Mom's new husband Louis Rove. Karl didn't know until much later in life that Louis wasn't his biological father and has spoken about his stepfather's "Selfless" love for raising Karl & his brother as his own. Sadly, Louis left his family fairly late in life and lived out his days as an out homosexual. His admiration for his Stepfather didn't stop Karl from demonizing gays at every turn, apparently.
Like many men in his generation, Karl lived through the Vietnam era. His draft number was a middle-of-the-pack 84. (1 to 195 were eventually called.) Karl, a Young Republican, was a staunch supporter of the war, but that didn't stop him for filing for repeated student deferments, even after he dropped out of college. He eventually was ruled 1A (eligible to be drafted) but managed to evade it till the draft ended in 1973. Unlike say John Kerry, who OPPOSED the war, but felt obligated to serve, Karl didn't enlist.
Karl dropped out to persue his interest in politics. In the fall of 1970, Karl snuck into the campaign office of Democrat Alan J. Dixon, who was running for Illinois State Treasurer, and stole 1000 sheets of paper with campaign letterhead. Rove then printed fake campaign rally fliers promising "free beer, free food, girls and a good time for nothing", and distributed them at rock concerts and homeless shelters, with the effect of disrupting Dixon's rally. Twenty-nine years later Karl admitted to the "dirty trick" and said he "regreted" it- most likely he regreted that Dixon still Crushed Karl's candidate, despite the stunt.
Lee Atwater ran Karl's first campaign, a run for the head of the US Young Republicans. It was a pairing that seemed made in, uh- heaven. Perhaps it's more accurate to say that Atwater, long hailed as the most morally bankrupt man to serve in politics, ever- served as a mentor to Karl. Atwater was Satan to Rove's Lucifer, as it were.
After just narrowly missing going down in flames for his involvement in Republican Dirty tricks during the Watergate era, Karl found a new Mentor in George HW Bush. While serving as Bush's "Special Assistant" Karl was sent on an errand to deliver a set of Car Keys to his son GW Bush. It was quite literally, love at first sight: Karl's actaul quote on the moment? "Huge amounts of charisma, swagger, cowboy boots, flight jacket, wonderful smile, just charisma - you know, wow"
Like most of the "Family values" set, Karl has two families: He & his first wife divorced in 1980 and he remarried in 1986. His only degree is an honorary one from Jerry Falwell’s Liberty Baptist University.
Like his Minion Ann Coulter, Karl has a history of voting where he doesn't live. In 2005 he was investigated for registering to vote in Texas despite having no residence there. He & his wife divided their time between a mansion in DC and a million-dollar winter home in Florida.
Karl's poltical clients are a who's who of thoroughly despicable human beings: Rick ("Good Hair") Parry, Kay Bailey Hutchinson, Richard Thornburgh, John Ashcroft and of course, his boyhood crush, George W Bush.
With a career like that, what will Karl be best rememebred for? Will it be his dazzling response to Hurricane Katrina? Will it be his compassion in the days following 9/11 when he urged capitalizing on it politically and said "liberals saw the savagery of the 9/11 attacks and wanted to prepare indictments and offer therapy and understanding for our attackers"? Or will it be his role in outing a CIA agent in wartime for political gain? Or perhaps his greatest triumph lies ahead? God, I hope not.
