"What to Wear to the Funeral?" An article written by Dana Perry. (Tissue box required.)

[CapnHook]

Posted: 3/20/10 at 10:19pm

I was browsing the Documentaries listing on my HBO On Demand and came across the title BOY INTERRUPTED. It was a film directed by a mother/filmmaker whose son had committed suicide at the age of 15. What sparked my interest was that this wasn't a typical story nor a typical documentary. It was a film. Made by a mother. Whose son committed suicide. A film about her dead son.

That takes so much courage...just so much of...SOMETHING that I cannot even fathom what that SOMETHING is that it takes to make such a film. I hope it brought her and her husband some closure (he was the director of photography).

I haven't watched the film yet. I wanted to research the story first. And in my research, I came across this article from the Huffington Post, written by Dana Perry herself. I warn you to have a tissue box handy...

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/dana-perry/what-to-wear-to-the-funer_b_251758.html

[StockardFan]

Posted: 3/20/10 at 10:29pm

That is so heartbreaking.

[mormonophobic]

Posted: 3/20/10 at 11:39pm

Thank you very much for posting that. Definitely needed to dry my eyes more than once. The entire situation (from the death itself, to the description of the dress accents matching her and her son's eyes) is just so incredibly sad. Without wanting to get too much into it, I'm bipolar and have certainly contemplated suicide, but it's things like this that truly keep me from it. As much as I would like to say it's happy things like friends & Broadway, it's mainly the guilt and knowledge that me doing that would really hurt others.

I think what many forget (or never even think of) is that taking a life (whether your own or another person's) is the one thing you can't take back. When trying to cheer myself or other downtrodden friends up (as much as I'm not all that mentally healthy, as a psychology major I often counsel my friends and loved ones) I try to stress that: As much as life may be painful and so difficult, the wonderful thing is that it might change. True, it might get a lot worse. Or tomorrow might be the best day of your life. You might end it all right before your life was going to change forever. Wouldn't it suck to miss out on that possibility? Unfortunately, it's difficult to think logically when you are in such an emotional state, especially when you see the entire world (and everyone in it) through gray-colored glasses.

I apologize if any of this was rambling or incomprehensible. After reading the article, I just felt the need to react. And the need to eventually watch Boy Interrupted. Thank you again for posting this.

[CapnHook]

Posted: 3/21/10 at 1:21am

WARNING: Suicide is always a touchy subject. You never want to say something wrong and you usually end up censoring yourself (perhaps for better or maybe for worse). Continued discussion may be graphic, may cause depressed thoughts, and may "trigger." If you feel that you're not in a good place to talk about suicide/depression/bi-polar disorder openly and candidly without getting "triggered" then do not continue to read this thread. END WARNING.

I just finished watching the documentary. I was very impressed with the filmmaking. The interviews, the "writing," the incorporation of home movies, etc.

You will definitely need tissues. I highly recommend this one.

SPOILERS

I think it was incredibly brave of the Perrys to interview their own family so candidly, to film the location of where he jumped, to include what he wrote on the suicide note, to interview his friends, and to show all of their home movies (including the funeral).

END SPOILERS

And mormonophobic -- while I'm not bipolar, I certainly have had my share of suicidal thoughts during my elementary/middle school years. Without getting too much into it...I even vaguely remember trying to kill myself but not knowing how to do it (my attempt didn't even harm me, it was silly really). It's a place I don't want to go back to. And I have the same thoughts you do, the main reason why I didn't go beyond consideration is because I didn't want to cause others any pain.

SPOILERS

What is scary, however, are the thoughts that Evan expressed in his suicide note. I share every thought he listed. Every one. And his half-brother was spot-on: what 15-year old DOESN'T have those thoughts. Hell, I still have those feelings. The difference is is that he was just wired differently. Evan had different chemistry in his brain and he acted upon his suicidal thoughts.

END SPOILERS

About 3 years ago my roommate attempted suicide. We haven't truly talked about it, I think he tried to mix medication. He was depressed, I believe. We have lived in an apartment for two years now and 3 years ago (when he attempted) we were suitemates in college. He was voluntarily committed into a mental hospital. When he checked himself out, he would often share stories of the other patients at the hospital. He would laugh about them and reminisce. Always made me feel uncomfortable, but I listened and laughed. He has a psychology degree now and is an intern at a psychologists office. On the one hand, I am scared at the fact that a once-suicidal man is now providing therapy for other suicidals. On the other hand, I guess he has a prospective to help others through.