is this sentence a run on... ?
is this sentence a run on... ?#0
Posted: 11/6/05 at 8:57pm
However, “Sonny Side Up” reigns over “Duets” with it’s over the top, awe inspiring improvisations that leave you saying, “Damn” and from the fast paced, seemingly never-ending Bop songs, to the slower paced, relaxed Cool songs that flow seamlessly from one to another.
To shorten the extra stuff...
However, “Sonny Side Up” reigns over “Duets” with it’s over the improvisations and from the Bop songs, to the Cool songs that flow seamlessly from one to another.
That is the basic sentence, then I obviously added the rest...
curious if it is a run on or not and if there is anyway to fix it.
And along these lines, if you want, criticize my first two paragraphs of this paper (I'm reviewing a CD, next paragraphs will be an analyization and review of each song).
You are thrown in every and all directions possible after listening to “Sonny Side Up”—left amazed and in jaw dropping awe while this amazing trio is at work. Dizzy Gillespie on trumpet, Sonny Stitt and Sonny Rollins both on tenor sax, while accompanied by Ray Bryant (piano), Tommy Bryant (bass), Charlie Persip (drums). After the beautiful, yet fairly dissonant first chord that kicks off the relaxed first track, “On the Sunny Side of the Street”, you know you are in for a good time. No, a great time. Even with only four tracks, it is more than enough to fall in love with this incredible album. The outstanding chemistry apparent between each of these amazing artists draws you in and leaves you yearning for more.
You can’t help it; you just want to keep listening. The album has a balance of both styles prevalent in the 50’s and whether the track is cool and laid-back or hot and fiery; each is able to pull you in. The album was recorded at Nola Recording Studio in New York City on December 19, 1957, a week after another recording was made, “Duets” (Tower Records). Similar to “Sonny Side Up”, “Duets” also exhibits the remarkable chemistry between these three great Jazz musicians. However, “Sonny Side Up” reigns over “Duets” with it’s over the top, awe inspiring improvisations that leave you saying, “Damn” and from the fast paced, seemingly never-ending Bop songs, to the slower paced, relaxed Cool songs that flow seamlessly from one to another. From start to finish “Sonny Side Up” leaves you listening hard and loving it. You just can’t put the music down, even once it is finished.
So yea, any help appreciated thanks. And if you don't wanna read the long thing, don't have to, but at least help with the sentence thing please.
re: is this sentence a run on... ?#1
Posted: 11/6/05 at 9:54pm
you have commas there that are not needed
However, “Sonny Side Up” reigns over “Duets” with it’s over the top awe-inspiring improvisations that leave you saying “Damn”, from the fast paced, seemingly never-ending Bop songs, to the slower paced relaxed Cool songs, that flow seamlessly from one to another.
re: is this sentence a run on... ?#2
Posted: 11/6/05 at 11:35pm
I would split in into two pieces like:
“Sonny Side Up” reigns over “Duets” with it’s over the top awe-inspiring improvisations that leave you saying “Damn.” From the fast paced, seemingly never-ending bop songs, to the slower paced, relaxed cool songs that flow seamlessly from one to another.
re: is this sentence a run on... ?#3
Posted: 11/7/05 at 2:20am
good idea, but this second one is not a complete sentence
From the fast paced, seemingly never-ending bop songs, to the slower paced, relaxed cool songs that flow seamlessly from one to another.
(there is no verb denoting action.......)
perhaps add something after another lie.."the action is magic"....or the "the flow is seamless".....
re: is this sentence a run on... ?#4
Posted: 11/7/05 at 2:22pm
I would have two sentences the second begining "This is evident in (add what you have already, withou the "from".)
After Elphaba fixxed your original sentence it was not a run on, but remains far to busy and confusing for the reader.
re: is this sentence a run on... ?#5
Posted: 11/8/05 at 2:28am
I'm too tired to give extra feedback, but I'm editing for grammar and completeness. My suggested changes are in bold, but you can feel free to do with them as you please.
You are thrown in every and all possible directions after listening to “Sonny Side Up”—left amazed and in jaw-dropping awe while this amazing trio is at work.
Dizzy Gillespie on trumpet, Sonny Stitt and Sonny Rollins both on tenor sax, while accompanied by Ray Bryant (piano), Tommy Bryant (bass), Charlie Persip (drums).
[This is not a complete sentence...you need a verb]
After the beautiful, yet fairly dissonant first chord that kicks off the relaxed first track, “On the Sunny Side of the Street”, you know you are in for a good time. No, a great time. Even with only four tracks, there is more than enough to fall in love with on this incredible album.
The outstanding chemistry apparent between each of these amazing artists draws you in and leaves you yearning for more.
You can’t help it; you just want to keep listening. The album has a balance of both styles prevalent in the 50’s and whether the track is cool and laid-back or hot and fiery, each is able to pull you in.
The album was recorded at Nola Recording Studio in New York City on December 19, 1957, a week after another recording was made, “Duets” (Tower Records). Similar to “Sonny Side Up”, “Duets” also exhibits the remarkable chemistry between these three great Jazz musicians. However, “Sonny Side Up” reigns over “Duets” with its over the top, awe inspiring improvisations that leave you saying, “Damn,” and from the fast-paced, seemingly never-ending Bop songs, to the slower paced, relaxed Cool songs that flow seamlessly into one another.
[Technically not a run on, but I agree with splitting it up for clarity]
From start to finish, “Sonny Side Up” leaves you listening hard and loving it. You just can’t put the music down, even once it is finished.
*Depending on your English teacher, commas may be better placed before quotation marks than after. Also, I may have gone overboard with the hyphons.
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re: is this sentence a run on... ?#6
Posted: 11/8/05 at 10:27pmthe second part of the first sentence is a fragment, not a run on
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