Favourite Monty Python Sketch Or Quote?

[Schmerg_The_Impaler]

Posted: 9/21/08 at 7:34pm

I'm pretty obsessed with Monty Python... to the extent that Spamalot is my favourite musical. So I just wanted to see what some people listed as their favourite sketch or quote.

Can't think of a number one favourite off the top of my head (other than the obvious Silly Walks one), so I'll pop back later. But I did the Anne Elk sketch as an audition for a musical last year.

[best12bars]

Posted: 9/21/08 at 7:35pm

The Twit Race.

No contest... even though it WAS a contest!

It reminds me of every reality show I've ever taken a peek at on TV today.

[miss pennywise]

Posted: 9/21/08 at 7:55pm

Love The Twit Race. I cried the first time I saw it. I had never seen anything as funny up to that point.

I also like The Dead Parrot Skit. The Lumberjack. The Accountant-Lion Tamer routine. The Foreign Foreign Dictionary. And The Sex Therapist.

That's all I can think of off the top of my head.

[Roscoe]

Posted: 9/21/08 at 8:13pm

I like the 127th Upper Class Twit of the Year Show.

Probably my all time favorite for sheer silliness is the Battleigh Townswomen's Guild Re-enactment of the Battle of Pearl Harbor. It makes me laugh out loud everytime I see it.

I do like another odd little sketch about a miner who comes home to visit his artistic parents, provoking a fight. "And look what you've done to mother! She's worn out with meeting film stars, attending premieres and giving gala luncheons!' "There's na wrong with gala luncheons, lad! I've had more gala luncheons than you've had hot dinners!"

[best12bars]

Posted: 9/21/08 at 8:29pm

The Battle of Pearl Harbor would have to be my second choice, Roscoe.

In fact, it's a photo finish.

Brilliant stuff. Pure, simple, raw insanity.

[Juliash]

Posted: 9/21/08 at 8:33pm

I know its cliche.

BUT NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[TomMonster]

Posted: 9/21/08 at 8:44pm

The Cheese Sketch (where they don't really seem to have any) and the Ministry of Silly Walks..as well as the above mentioned.

However, my favorite quote is: "What's the penguin doing on the telly?"

"Standing"

[Roscoe]

Posted: 9/22/08 at 8:57am

"If it lays an egg, it will fall down the back of the television set."

"We'll have to watch that. Unless it's a male."

"Oh, I never thought of that."

"It looks fairly butch."

[Reginald Tresilian]

Posted: 9/22/08 at 9:57am

I can't tell you why, but this exchange always put me on the effing floor:

Mrs. Non-Smoker: Oohh hello, Mrs. Smoker.

Mrs. Smoker: Hello Mrs. Non-Smoker.

Mrs. Non-Smoker: What, you been shopping then?

Mrs. Smoker: Nope ... I've been shopping!

Mrs. Non-Smoker: What d'you buy?

Mrs. Smoker: A piston engine!

Mrs. Non-Smoker: What d'you buy that for?

Mrs. Smoker: It was a bargain!

Mrs. Non-Smoker: How much d'you want for it?

Mrs. Smoker: Three quid!

Mrs. Non-Smoker: Done. (she hands over the money)

Mrs. Smoker: Right. Thank you.

Mrs. Non-Smoker: How d'you cook it?

Mrs. Smoker: You don't cook it.

Mrs. Non-Smoker: You can't eat that raw!

Mrs. Smoker: Ooooh ... never thought of that.

[Roscoe]

Posted: 9/22/08 at 10:15am

Reg, that's a new one to me. The exchange about "Have you been shopping?" "No, I've been shopping" turns up in another little exchange.

"Our weapon is surprise, surprise and fear, fear and surpise, our TWO weapons are fear, surprise and a ruthless efficiency. Our three weapons are fear, surprise, ruthless efficiency and an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope -- I'll come in again."

"You'll have to forgive Elsie. She may seem to be rather talentless boring and dull, but on the other hand... Sorry I can't think of anything."

"You said you'd tell us how to defend ourselves against pointed sticks."

"I'm a lumberjack and I'm okay..."

Ah, the memories, the memories..........

[Cruel_Sandwich]

Posted: 9/22/08 at 10:29am

Pretty much the entirety of THE MEANING OF LIFE.

Either the sperm song or the bloody liver people.

[Jon]

Posted: 9/22/08 at 12:03pm

Intercourse the penguin!

[Reginald Tresilian]

Posted: 9/22/08 at 12:05pm

Also the Queen Victoria Handicap and the Summarize Proust Competition.

[StockardFan]

Posted: 9/22/08 at 12:08pm

Anything from the Holy Grail. Love that movie!

[Roscoe]

Posted: 9/22/08 at 12:14pm

Host: I'm afraid none of the contestants this evening have succeeded in encapsulating Proust's masterwork. So I'm going to give the Grand Prize to the girl with the biggest tits.

[husk_charmer]

Posted: 9/22/08 at 12:20pm

My favorite is the Restaurant (Abuse/Cannibalism), where Eric Idle plays the fast talking wife, and ends the sketch with:

She: Oh I don't like that. I think it's silly. It's not a proper sketch without a proper punchline. I mean I don't know much about anything, I'm stupid. I'm muggins. Nobody cares what I think. I'm always the one that has to do everything. Nobody cares about me. Well I'm going to have a lot of bloody babies and they can bloody well care about me. Makes you sick half this television. They never stop talking, he'll be the ruination of her, rhythm method.

[Roscoe]

Posted: 9/22/08 at 12:35pm

Sudden Greek Messenger: Imagine not that these four walls contain the might owl of Thebes. For, gentles all, beauty sits most closely on them it can construe.

Maitre D': No, it doesn't.

S.G.M.: Sorry. (Leaves)

And one of my favorite bits of sheer weirdness, from an early courtroom sketch. Graham Chapman in drag taking the oath:

I swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, so anyway, I said to her, I said, they can't afford that on what he earns, I mean for a start the feathers get up your nose, I ask you, four and six a pound, and him with a wooden leg, I don't know how she puts up with it after all the trouble she's had with her you-know-what, anyway it was a white wedding much to everyone's surprise, of course they bought everything on the hire purchase, I think they ought to send them back where they came from, I mean you've got to be cruel to be kind so Mrs Harris said, so she said, she said, she said, the dead crab she said, she said. Well, her sister's gone to Rhodesia what with her womb and all, and her youngest, her youngest as thin as a filing cabinet, and the goldfish, the goldfish they've got whooping cough they keep spitting water all over their Bratbys, well, they do don't they, I mean you can't, can you, I mean they're not even married or anything, they're not even divorced, and he's in the KGB if you ask me, he says he's a tree surgeon but I don't like the sound of his liver, all that squeaking and banging every night till the small hours, his mother's been much better since she had her head off, yes she has, I said, don't you talk to me about bladders, I said...

[withoutlovewithoutU]

Posted: 9/22/08 at 2:46pm

Dead Parrot is my all-time favorite. I love it all though!

[Reginald Tresilian]

Posted: 9/22/08 at 2:48pm

If I had to pick one, it would probably be the dead parrot.

[Schmerg_The_Impaler]

Posted: 9/22/08 at 3:06pm

Oh god, the penguin on the telly... that one's a classic.

"Why'd you say Burma?"

"I PANICKED."

For some reason, I absolutely love that very surreal sketch where Graham is playing an upperclass father who's obsessed with 'woody' and 'tinny' sounding words... "Caribou... gorn..."

And I love that one about the men who choose to live as mice, done as a shocking expose, where they interview people on the street and they say things like, "Well, I mean, they can't help it, can they? But, er, there's nothing you can do about so, er, I'd kill 'em." and "I would shove sparrows down their throats until the beaks stuck out through their stomach walls."

Lumberjack sketch is always great. Oh, and the chocolate shop-- that was my first Monty Python sketch, at age five. And I love the silly elections, with the ridiculous names and costumes. And Spot the Loony.

[Jon]

Posted: 9/22/08 at 3:11pm

Nature show narrator:

"Here we see two pantomime horses locked in a life or death struggle over a job at a merchant bank..."

[Roscoe]

Posted: 9/22/08 at 3:16pm

Nature show narrator: "Here we see a honeybear, not engaged in a life or death struggle with anything. These honeybears are placid and timid creatures, and consequently bad television."

[Schmerg_The_Impaler]

Posted: 9/22/08 at 3:19pm

Oh, how could I forget my favourite sketch- THE VISITORS. It's got some of the best quotes, like, "Name's Name, Arthur Name, name by name, but not by nature!" And "Remember me from the pub? About three years ago? The tall thin one with the mustache?" And, "What's brown and sounds like a bell? DUNG!" "Brian Equator, like 'round the middle of the earth, but with an 'L'!" "How are you, you great poof?" "HAHAHAHAHAHA... ooooh... I wet 'em!" And of course, "I don't much like the tone of your voice *BANG* Right, let's have a ding-dong!"

Also, I absolutely love the Bruces sketch, because their Australian accents are just terrible and it's brilliantly fun to quote.

[TomMonster]

Posted: 9/22/08 at 7:36pm

"Nudge, nudge, wink, wink" sketch always makes me laugh.

[Schmerg_The_Impaler]

Posted: 9/22/08 at 7:37pm

"Are you insinuating something?"

"No, no, no, no, no... yes."