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Galindy's gonna tell me a story!!! — Page 13

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#301

re: Galindy's gonna tell me a story!!!

yes please!
"People asking questions, lost in confusion. Well I tell them there's no problems, only solutions." ~The one and only John Lennon
#302

re: Galindy's gonna tell me a story!!!

Alright...
Every night, Frank would go down to the liquor store, get a six pack, bring it home, and drink it while he watched TV. One night, as he finished his last beer, the doorbell rang. He stumbled to the door and found a six-foot cockroach standing there. The bug grabbed him by the collar and threw him across the room, then left.
"Someone please tell me- when the hell did gravity become the enemy? How has an essential force of nature, something that makes it possible for life to even exist on this planet, come to deserve the scorn and hatred of every teenage girl with no head voice?"- Broadway Matt
#303

re: Galindy's gonna tell me a story!!!

hahahaha. why does everything have to do with drugs or alcohol?
"People asking questions, lost in confusion. Well I tell them there's no problems, only solutions." ~The one and only John Lennon
#304

re: Galindy's gonna tell me a story!!!

Because I'm telling the story re: Galindy's gonna tell me a story!!!

The next night, after he finished his 4th beer, the doorbell rang. He walked slowly to the door and found the same six-foot cockroach standing there. The big bug punched him in the stomach, then left.
"Someone please tell me- when the hell did gravity become the enemy? How has an essential force of nature, something that makes it possible for life to even exist on this planet, come to deserve the scorn and hatred of every teenage girl with no head voice?"- Broadway Matt
#305

re: Galindy's gonna tell me a story!!!

The next night, after he finished his 1st beer, the doorbell rang again. The same six-foot cockroach was standing there. This time he was kneed in the groin and hit behind the ear as he doubled over in pain. Then the big bug left.
"Someone please tell me- when the hell did gravity become the enemy? How has an essential force of nature, something that makes it possible for life to even exist on this planet, come to deserve the scorn and hatred of every teenage girl with no head voice?"- Broadway Matt
#306

re: Galindy's gonna tell me a story!!!

why doesn't he hit the ****roach back?! c'mon, you are always fiesty when you're drunk!!
"People asking questions, lost in confusion. Well I tell them there's no problems, only solutions." ~The one and only John Lennon
#307

re: Galindy's gonna tell me a story!!!

I don't know, I didn't make it up.

The fourth night Frank didn't drink at all. The doorbell rang. The cockroach was standing there. The bug beat the snot out of Frank and left him in a heap on the living room floor.
"Someone please tell me- when the hell did gravity become the enemy? How has an essential force of nature, something that makes it possible for life to even exist on this planet, come to deserve the scorn and hatred of every teenage girl with no head voice?"- Broadway Matt
#309

re: Galindy's gonna tell me a story!!!

hahahaha i love you guys. poor frank dude.
"People asking questions, lost in confusion. Well I tell them there's no problems, only solutions." ~The one and only John Lennon
#310

re: Galindy's gonna tell me a story!!!

I love you both too. Alright now for the corny ending...

The following day, Frank went to see his doctor. He explained events of the preceding four nights. "What can I do?" he pleaded. "Not much" the doctor replied. "There's just a nasty bug going around."

"Someone please tell me- when the hell did gravity become the enemy? How has an essential force of nature, something that makes it possible for life to even exist on this planet, come to deserve the scorn and hatred of every teenage girl with no head voice?"- Broadway Matt
#311

re: Galindy's gonna tell me a story!!!

that was stupid. lol. no offense to you!
"People asking questions, lost in confusion. Well I tell them there's no problems, only solutions." ~The one and only John Lennon
#312

re: Galindy's gonna tell me a story!!!

It's alright, I didn't make it. I copied and pasted. Want more?
"Someone please tell me- when the hell did gravity become the enemy? How has an essential force of nature, something that makes it possible for life to even exist on this planet, come to deserve the scorn and hatred of every teenage girl with no head voice?"- Broadway Matt
#315

re: Galindy's gonna tell me a story!!!

Also since its only us four lets go my a first name basis. my name is Kristen. Not kristin like chenoweth i always get that!lol
*Kristen*
#317

re: Galindy's gonna tell me a story!!!

I'll stay with Galindy unless you want to type out Alexandra or Alex is fine too.

Story:


The college professor had just finished explaining an important research project to his class. He emphasized that this paper was an absolute requirement for passing his class, and that there would be only two acceptable excuses for being late. Those were a medically certifiable illness or a death in the student's immediate family. A smart ass student in the back of the classroom waved his hand and spoke up. "But what about extreme sexual exhaustion, professor?" As you would expect, the class exploded in laughter. When the students had finally settled down, the professor froze the young man with a glaring look. "Well," he responded, "I guess you'll just have to learn to write with your other hand."
"Someone please tell me- when the hell did gravity become the enemy? How has an essential force of nature, something that makes it possible for life to even exist on this planet, come to deserve the scorn and hatred of every teenage girl with no head voice?"- Broadway Matt
#318

re: Galindy's gonna tell me a story!!!

Very Superstitious
A superstitious Romanian, who refused to leave his house on Friday the 13th to avoid bad luck, died after he was stung by a wasp in his kitchen, police said.

This is a true story! Sad.
Happened this April.
*Kristen*
#319

re: Galindy's gonna tell me a story!!!

Aww, poor superstitious Romanian, you will be missed. re: Galindy's gonna tell me a story!!!
"Someone please tell me- when the hell did gravity become the enemy? How has an essential force of nature, something that makes it possible for life to even exist on this planet, come to deserve the scorn and hatred of every teenage girl with no head voice?"- Broadway Matt
#320

re: Galindy's gonna tell me a story!!!

August 17, 2004

TWO days after the family of a migrant who drowned while crossing the Rio Grande buried his body, the man called to say he was alive and well.


Here's another this is fun!
*Kristen*
#322

re: Galindy's gonna tell me a story!!!

Well I have to go but I might be on later. Nite if I don't come back! Kisses and Love to all.
"Someone please tell me- when the hell did gravity become the enemy? How has an essential force of nature, something that makes it possible for life to even exist on this planet, come to deserve the scorn and hatred of every teenage girl with no head voice?"- Broadway Matt
#323

re: Galindy's gonna tell me a story!!!

BYE!xo read my stories in the morning!



Bill, Jim, and Scott were at a convention together and were
sharing a large suite on the top of a 75 story sky scraper.
After a long day of meetings they were shocked to hear that the
elevators in their hotel were broken and they would have to climb
75 flights of stairs to get to their room. Bill said to Jim and
Scott, let's break the monotony of this unpleasant task by
concentrating on something interesting. I'll tell jokes for 25
flights, and Jim can sing songs for 25 flights, and Scott can
tell sad stories the rest of the way. At the 26th floor Bill
stopped telling jokes and Jim began to sing. At the 51st floor
Jim stopped singing and Scott began to tell sad stories. "I will
tell my saddest story first," he said. "I left the room key in
the car!"



*Kristen*
#325

re: Galindy's gonna tell me a story!!!

There once was a rich man who was near death. He was very grieved because he had worked so hard for his money and he wanted to take it with him to heaven. So he began to pray that he might be able to take some of his wealth with him.

An angel hears his plea and appears to him.
"Sorry, but you can't take your wealth with you."
The man implores the angel to speak to God to see if He might bend the rules.

The man continues to pray that his wealth could follow him.

The angel reappears and informs the man that God has decided to allow him to take one suitcase with him. Overjoyed, the man gathers his largest suitcase and fills it with pure gold bars and places it beside his bed.

Soon afterward the man dies and shows up at the Gates of Heaven to greet St. Peter.

Seeing the suitcase St. Peter says,
"Hold on, you can't bring that in here!"

But, the man explains to St. Peter that he has permission and asks him to verify his story with the Lord. Sure enough, St. Peter checks and comes back saying,
"You're right. You are allowed one carry-on bag, but I'm supposed to check its contents before letting it through."

St. Peter opens the suitcase to inspect the worldly items that the man found too precious to leave behind and exclaims,
"You brought pavement?!!!"


*Kristen*

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