House plants- Why?
Joined: 12/31/69
House plants- Why?#1
Posted: 1/15/13 at 1:39pm

I am sick of house plants. Stinking up a room with their damn oxygen. The whirring and clanking as they perform photosynthesis all the time. I can hear them whispering and muttering as they plot against me. They are going to get theirs.
Damn them.
Updated On: 1/15/13 at 01:39 PM
House plants- Why?#2
Posted: 1/15/13 at 2:25pmAfter all the support Joe gave you and your troupe and a is all you have to contribute?
Joined: 12/31/69
House plants- Why?#4
Posted: 1/15/13 at 2:30pmTaz, the House Plant Lobby is huge and powerful. I don't blame anyone for being afraid to speak out against these inhuman (literally) monsters.
House plants- Why?#5
Posted: 1/15/13 at 2:31pmI got rid of mine. They are so high maintenance, too much luggage. The nerve of them being so needy for water. Good riddance to bad rubbish!
House plants- Why?#6
Posted: 1/15/13 at 2:39pmMine never come when they are called!
House plants- Why?#7
Posted: 1/15/13 at 2:46pm
oops sorry Joe I don't know why that a posted.
I like that people build home to protect them selves sun, water, plants and animals. Then spend all their money bringing back in the sun, water, plants and animals.
ps
A
House plants- Why?#8
Posted: 1/15/13 at 2:47pmI wanted to try counseling but my plants refused. That's when I finally thought, You know what? It's time to put me in the sunlight for a change..ME.
Joined: 12/31/69
House plants- Why?#9
Posted: 1/15/13 at 2:51pm
It's OK Dead Kevin- you know I love you guys!
(But a few sketches in your underwear would make me love you MORE!)
House plants- Why?#10
Posted: 1/15/13 at 3:36pmOMG, this thread is funny! I've given up on houseplants. We had a big ficus tree in the corner of the family room, and I couldn't even keep that alive.
House plants- Why?#11
Posted: 1/15/13 at 4:11pmFicus trees are known to be a suicidal genus. They never just walk by an open window!
Broadway Legend Joined: 1/14/05
House plants- Why?#12
Posted: 1/15/13 at 4:38pmI have three house plants that are over 20 years old! They are more loyal than my kids and the dog!
Broadway Legend Joined: 10/18/04
House plants- Why?#15
Posted: 1/15/13 at 5:03pmbrdlwyr. I have one approaching 30. It now just sits there and says "Oy, pay no attention to me, I will just sit here and wilt. Would a mere drink of water to be too much to ask?". I hope it has made out it's will!
House plants- Why?#16
Posted: 1/15/13 at 6:14pmI had one that grew so tall it was at the ceiling, and even bending over. I put it in the lobby hoping someone would adopt it. But I know how hard it is to adopt grown ups.
House plants- Why?#17
Posted: 1/15/13 at 9:39pmMine was bending over too. I had to resort to bondage and tie it to the curtain rod.
House plants- Why?#18
Posted: 1/15/13 at 10:24pmMine to seem to want Mark Walberg dead.
Joined: 12/31/69
House plants- Why?#19
Posted: 1/16/13 at 1:33pmI hate my plants so much I am shopping for a pet goat to eat them.
House plants- Why?#20
Posted: 1/16/13 at 1:55pmEveryone knows that goats only eat tin cans!
"In Oz, the verb is douchifizzation." PRS
House plants- Why?#21
Posted: 1/16/13 at 5:17pmSomeone once told me plants were for sensitive people. Since I'm dead inside, I threw them out.
House plants- Why?#22
Posted: 1/17/13 at 12:38amTry mushrooms then Jane they thrive on dead matter!
House plants- Why?#23
Posted: 1/17/13 at 9:55amSNAFU, I think that's what killed me!
Team BWW Joined: 12/5/11
House plants- Why?#24
Posted: 1/17/13 at 11:35am
People! People!
We must starve them out! Deny them of water, sunlight, and they shall perish! Barricade them in dark places (closet, basement)!
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