I'm getting all teary-eyed! Thank you all so much for coming to my sexy little party. You are marvelous, each and every one of you! And you inspire me!! *kisses* *kisses*
*dries eyes* *sobs dramatically*
I want to take this moment, my finest moment to date, to make a solemn promise to the board that I will not abuse my newfound power and authority unless it's for something truly funny or ironic. Nor will I bring shame to the House Of Matt, a name I humbly share with such fine gentlemen as Matt G and Mister Matt.
*music cue to wrap it up*
AND LASTLY! I AM ANNOUNCING MY 8-STEP PLAN TO INCORPORATE A SERIES OF BERETS AND MONACLES INTO MY WARDROBE SO I'LL BE READY FOR THE DAY I BECOME A BROADWAY LEGEND!! THANK YOU!!!
"The last train out of any station will not be full of nice guys."
- Dr. Hunter S. Thompson
"I wash my face, then drink beer, then I weep.
Say a prayer and induce insincere self-abuse,
till I'm fast asleep"- In Trousers