#1
Posted: 12/14/04 at 9:25pm
This just happened to me an hour ago. My eyes are still swollen and my throat is hoarse from screaming and crying so much. I never considered myself to be naive, but I feel like I'm seeing society in a new light. Today was the first time I've ever experienced serious racial discrimination.
It's ironic because being a Chinese in Vancouver, there's a bit of "minor" discrimination since there's such a huge Asian population here, but mostly in the form of stereotyping and such.
But today was the first time someone actually threw my heritage in my face and tried to run me over with his car. (Keep in mind I know this isn't just a problem with white people vs. Chinese people - I'm just recounting my own experience today.)
I was at the checkout counter at a store and a man was standing behind us. He was slight white man, dressed like a construction worker. Because our items were taking a long time, he got to go ahead. I wasn't paying attention to him when he asked me quietly to move out of the way so he could use the Interac machine, but I quickly obliged when I heard him.
As he was leaving the store, he muttered for my mom and I to "Get the F*CK outta my way, Asians." I waited about 20 seconds in shock, until I flew out behind him into the parking lot, my mom yelling at me not to go.
I was about 30 feet behind him and I yelled, "Excuse me, if you've got a problem with me, saying to my FACE instead of MUTTERING IT, ASSHOLE!" The guy looked behind, and then got into his big green truck.
I was standing, shocked and shaking, in the middle of the parking lot. I started walking back to the store and apologized to the startled fellow having a smoke nearby. Suddenly I hear the roar of the guy's truck coming towards me.
I turned around, and the guy slammed on his acceleration, going at about 40mph. If I had waited a second sooner, I would have been dead. Period.
So the guy blows past me, looks at me, and the look in his eyes was just pure...I can't explain it. Just...disgust. Or hatred. He turns 90 degrees, rolls down his window and says, "GET OUT OF CANADA, YOU F*CKING CHINK!!" and blows out of the parking lot. I couldn't get his licence plate number and I was going to go back and get his Interac receipt from the store, but my mom said what would be the point, and that I shouldn't have went after him. My dad supported this.
Yes, my parents, who have always tried to hammer "Asian honor" into my head when I was growing up, told me it was my fault I got myself into this situation and that I shouldn't have went after him. They said I needed to pick my battles, because let's say the guy had hit me and I was paralyzed for life, he would only get maybe 2 years on jail tops, but my life is ruined forever.
Is that what it's really come down to? How can we win if people like this are not only NOT penalized for these sorts of hate crimes, but are in fact POSITIVELY REINFORCED to continue doing this because everyone is helpless to fight them?
I'm so disillusioned and jaded right now. It's made me seriously re-think law school, to say the least. My parents are right. I can't make a difference, much less change the world. And the legal system and society is far too F*CKED UP for the real bad guys to go behind bars. So what do I think I'm going to achieve by going into this profession? This racist bastard here, who tried to run me over, would barely get a slap on the wrist if he had hit me. And because I was quick enough to jump out of the way, he doesn't even get a little reprimand. Does someone need to die before justice is served? And even then, justice is only served in small doses hardly proportionate to the crime.
So yeah, I'm kinda distraught right now. Thanks for reading. I know this may seem trivial and I'm sure you guys may have had experienced incidents like this, but it was a first time for me, and it was a real eye opener. I had to let this out because surprisingly, none of my white or even minority friends seem to get this. It seems like everyone's accepted this sort of discrimination and decided that since you can't fight it, you have to accept it, and watch your back (literally, in my case) and play the game. And lose. I mean, I'm still alive, but who's the winner here? It's not me.
It's ironic because being a Chinese in Vancouver, there's a bit of "minor" discrimination since there's such a huge Asian population here, but mostly in the form of stereotyping and such.
But today was the first time someone actually threw my heritage in my face and tried to run me over with his car. (Keep in mind I know this isn't just a problem with white people vs. Chinese people - I'm just recounting my own experience today.)
I was at the checkout counter at a store and a man was standing behind us. He was slight white man, dressed like a construction worker. Because our items were taking a long time, he got to go ahead. I wasn't paying attention to him when he asked me quietly to move out of the way so he could use the Interac machine, but I quickly obliged when I heard him.
As he was leaving the store, he muttered for my mom and I to "Get the F*CK outta my way, Asians." I waited about 20 seconds in shock, until I flew out behind him into the parking lot, my mom yelling at me not to go.
I was about 30 feet behind him and I yelled, "Excuse me, if you've got a problem with me, saying to my FACE instead of MUTTERING IT, ASSHOLE!" The guy looked behind, and then got into his big green truck.
I was standing, shocked and shaking, in the middle of the parking lot. I started walking back to the store and apologized to the startled fellow having a smoke nearby. Suddenly I hear the roar of the guy's truck coming towards me.
I turned around, and the guy slammed on his acceleration, going at about 40mph. If I had waited a second sooner, I would have been dead. Period.
So the guy blows past me, looks at me, and the look in his eyes was just pure...I can't explain it. Just...disgust. Or hatred. He turns 90 degrees, rolls down his window and says, "GET OUT OF CANADA, YOU F*CKING CHINK!!" and blows out of the parking lot. I couldn't get his licence plate number and I was going to go back and get his Interac receipt from the store, but my mom said what would be the point, and that I shouldn't have went after him. My dad supported this.
Yes, my parents, who have always tried to hammer "Asian honor" into my head when I was growing up, told me it was my fault I got myself into this situation and that I shouldn't have went after him. They said I needed to pick my battles, because let's say the guy had hit me and I was paralyzed for life, he would only get maybe 2 years on jail tops, but my life is ruined forever.
Is that what it's really come down to? How can we win if people like this are not only NOT penalized for these sorts of hate crimes, but are in fact POSITIVELY REINFORCED to continue doing this because everyone is helpless to fight them?
I'm so disillusioned and jaded right now. It's made me seriously re-think law school, to say the least. My parents are right. I can't make a difference, much less change the world. And the legal system and society is far too F*CKED UP for the real bad guys to go behind bars. So what do I think I'm going to achieve by going into this profession? This racist bastard here, who tried to run me over, would barely get a slap on the wrist if he had hit me. And because I was quick enough to jump out of the way, he doesn't even get a little reprimand. Does someone need to die before justice is served? And even then, justice is only served in small doses hardly proportionate to the crime.
So yeah, I'm kinda distraught right now. Thanks for reading. I know this may seem trivial and I'm sure you guys may have had experienced incidents like this, but it was a first time for me, and it was a real eye opener. I had to let this out because surprisingly, none of my white or even minority friends seem to get this. It seems like everyone's accepted this sort of discrimination and decided that since you can't fight it, you have to accept it, and watch your back (literally, in my case) and play the game. And lose. I mean, I'm still alive, but who's the winner here? It's not me.
"It's not always about you!!!" (But if you think I'm referring to you anyway, then I probably am.)
"Good luck returning my ass!" - Wilhemina Slater
"This is my breakfast, lunch and f***ing dinner right here. I'm not even f***in' joking." - Colin Farrell
"Good luck returning my ass!" - Wilhemina Slater
"This is my breakfast, lunch and f***ing dinner right here. I'm not even f***in' joking." - Colin Farrell
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