Is the internet REALLY for porn?

[broadwaybaby654]

Posted: 8/1/04 at 2:42am

I was in my high school locker room after a game (yes, I was a cheerleader, but not anymore, now I go to performing arts high school, go LACHSA!!! now back to the story...) with my friend (who is an Avenue Q FANATIC!!!)And I was humming "The internet is for porn" and got up to "The internet is for porn, the internet is for porn,..." My friend must have heard me and she sang very loudly, "GRAB YOUR DICK AND DOUBLE CLICK FOR PORN, PORN PORN!!!" After these words were spoken the whole locker room was silent. The silence must have been 10 seconds but it felt like an hour!!! There must have been at least 100 girls in this locker room. It was the most embarassing moment of my life!

Another Avenue Q moment, I was in Tower Records with my mom and we were looking at the Broadway section, my mom sticks the Avenue Q cd in my face and yells "PORN!" in the Trekkie monster voice. I started craking up and so did my mom. It was the kind of laughter that you can't stop even if you try.

Does anyone else have some funny Avenue Q moments? Updated On: 8/2/04 at 02:42 AM

[jonartdesigns]

Posted: 8/1/04 at 2:45am

i have one- my friend was listening to my cd in his car, rolled down the windows and starts blasting "racist"... unfortunately we hit every light in the african american and jewish neighborhood at the exactly the wrong moments

[BlueWizard]

Posted: 8/1/04 at 2:45am

The silence must have been 10 seconds but it felt like an hour!!! There must have beenb at least 100 girls in this locker room.

LOL, well if they can't handle the truth, then that's their problem!

And yes, the Internet is for porn.

[JakeB]

Posted: 8/1/04 at 5:18am

At my college we, as students, have been asked to promote ethnic equality around college. As I have a lot of friends from different ethnic backgrounds, I think it would be great for us to perform Everyone's a Little Bit Racist to the board of governers to show that, actually, racism isn't a problem in our college at all.

[Matt_G]

Posted: 8/1/04 at 9:48am

Oh, yes. Al Gore created the internet so he could stop hiding porn under his bed.

[Broadway Matt]

Posted: 8/1/04 at 11:18am

hehe i can think of a few funny Avenue Q moments. one that comes to mind is the time I was playing "Racist" for a group of Christian Sunday School students aged 6-8. we got to the Jesus part, when it finally occured to me the horrible message it might be sending the kids. everyone knows that Jesus is a "Wicked" fan.

then there was the time in 11th grade when I was at the porn store with my mom and the counter guy accused me of stealing lube. i had to empty out my pockets and, when he saw I did not try to steal lube, he apologized and gave it to me for free. on the way home my Ma and I laughed and talked and listened to "The Life" as I dreamt of a future where porn could walk hand in hand with musical theatre just like prostitution always had. This story has nothing to do with Avenue Q, but it was surely a day I'll never forget and a free packet of lube I'll never throw out.

[sabrelady]

Posted: 8/1/04 at 11:57am

Good to know where to go in the event of a lube shortage!!

[Zola Q. LaPlaya]

Posted: 8/1/04 at 12:19pm

Research from Hitwise uncovers that of the 500,000 websites it monitors, 39,000 are adult content sites. Not so many, right?

But, their research also shows that nearly one visit in five to the Internet is to a porn site. 18.8 percent of all traffic is divided among the thousands of different adult sites.

Since I know the next question will be how many sites are oriented toward woman and how many toward men and how many are to gay versus straight sites, let's turn to Google for the answer. A quick series of searches for word/phrases like:

"men porn sites" vs. "women porn sites", or
"men porn links" vs. "women porn links", or
"boy porn sites" vs. "girl porn sites", etc.

Seems to show that the COUNT of websites affiliated toward the female gender is typically in a ratio of about 60:40 or 65:35 versus the equivalent male gender (gay or straight).

Overall, the ratio of gay to straight porn sites is 1:38.

Conclusion: porn makes up a fraction of the websites that exist on the web. However, traffic to those sites is huge. Straight men, as always, have the largest number of sites available to them.

To answer your question: yes, the Internet is for porn.

[jrb_actor]

Posted: 8/1/04 at 12:26pm

wow, Zola--I'm really turned on seeing you get all analytical!! All that and a hot boy? Sigh!

[Zola Q. LaPlaya]

Posted: 8/1/04 at 12:28pm

Wanna see my bicep pic again?

[jrb_actor]

Posted: 8/1/04 at 12:29pm

*faints at the thought of it

[broadwaystar2b]

Posted: 8/1/04 at 12:30pm

Our school (which goes from K-12) often has pep rallies that involves the band, chorus, color guard, cheerleaders and dance team. If it's a really big game, we'll have two: one for the elementry school and one for the middle/high school. The geeks involved with the above listed activities are usually excused for the whole day, so a group of us usually go and hang out in the chorus room during the "intermission period" between the rallies (which is approx. 45 minutes).
One day during this break, everyone brought some CDs and we all agreed that everyone would get to play one song from their CD. I brought in Avenue Q and played #5: Racist. I know that they were probably thinking "Oh, it's [broadwaystar2b's] stupid showtunes" but once they heard Kate say "I find that RACIST" everyone perked up. As the song progressed everyone was laughing like hyenas. They wanted another, so I just let the CD continue to #6: PORN. One boy was laughing so hard he fell to the floor crying. They wanted to listen to more so I told them any track but #10. Well, suddenly I hear "Take her home she's wasted" and fly across the room and turn it off. My friends were all like "What's the big deal? It can't be that bad" and then I told them the title.
The chorus room is right across the hall from 5th grade math and since all those kids had just come back from a pep rally, I knew if the teacher "You Can Be as Loud as the Hell You Want When You're Making Love" I could have gotten suspended.

[BlueWizard]

Posted: 8/1/04 at 1:35pm

then there was the time in 11th grade when I was at the porn store with my mom and the counter guy accused me of stealing lube.

Broadway Matt, you take your mom to the local porn shop?

[Broadway Matt]

Posted: 8/1/04 at 2:05pm

see it sounds weird when you say it like that. i'm just very lucky to have had a very open household when it came to sexuality. i never made a habit of hitting adult entertainment venues with my parents. but they knew that when i was 17 or so and could pass for 18, I'd inevitably wind up exploring such establishments because honestly, a lot of my high school friends were perverts and I like seeing new things.

i've always gotten along well with my mom and have never minded hanging out with her, so why not invite her along to the adult bookstore if it's in the itinerary. it was always good for a laugh and it gave her a chance to keep an eye on us and see that I wasn't sinking a lot of money on nasty publications.

so i've been to porn stores and strip clubs with my mom, and was happy to have been free to get it out of my system before college. i quickly outgrew the whole scene mainly because theatre is more interesting to me and i needed to conserve as much money as possible to see musicals.

Updated On: 8/1/04 at 02:05 PM

[insomniak]

Posted: 8/1/04 at 2:07pm

Blue Wizard, you beat me to it.

[everythingtaboo]

Posted: 8/1/04 at 2:45pm

Who needs porn when you have the icons on this board?

[StickToPriest]

Posted: 8/1/04 at 2:49pm

Who needs porn when you have the Lindsay Lohan thread?

[BlueWizard]

Posted: 8/1/04 at 3:00pm

i'm just very lucky to have had a very open household when it came to sexuality.

That's cool. I'd love to be able to have a laugh with my mom over bad porn, it's hilarious. But she gets squirmy over open-mouth kissing, so doggie-style wouldn't be a good conversation for her.

i quickly outgrew the whole scene mainly because theatre is more interesting to me and i needed to conserve as much money as possible to see musicals.

Not to mention that the Internet has plenty of free porn.