It's just a message board.

[DG]

Posted: 12/4/05 at 2:58am

I have seen a few people over the last couple of years throw this phrase out – “It’s JUST a message board” – as a way of attempting to diminish other people’s interaction with BWW. I’d just like to share that, tonight, a friend who I made through this forum was able to add to, enhance and ultimately solidify my sister’s first Manhattan AND Broadway experience.

I am humbly grateful and moved that they took their time and energy to help us out like this – and I am forever grateful that I took the chance and investigated where these connections might lead. The end result is that I get to have a wonderful, sincere and GOOD person in my life, and my sister got to enjoy the extension of that friendship.

I think people who hide behind a cynical façade of dismissiveness are missing a great deal – and I feel sorry for them.

[jrb_actor]

Posted: 12/4/05 at 3:00am

It's just a message board and yet they are logged on to this message board as if it were their iron lung!

[Aigoo]

Posted: 12/4/05 at 3:01am

But it's really defining between making solid, beneficial connections or giving trust away too easily.

[DG]

Posted: 12/4/05 at 3:04am

Aiggo - given my recent situation, I can hardly argue that point of distinction. BUT, I still think there are those who want to denigrate the very concept of friendships that have meaning here, and I dispute that claim entirely.

[Aigoo]

Posted: 12/4/05 at 3:08am

Of course. My problem is trusting people all too well. I think of myself as extremely gullible and naive, so I become very trusting to things (or people) that I may not be completely sure of. I do find something wrong with those that continue to "put down" the relationships formed across these boards, but they do have a point of validity.

If it were not for the internet, I could never have met SEVERAL people in my life right now that helped me through such difficult times, and I've never seen them face-to-face. And every time you reach that point of realization that they're not there to hurt you, but help, then the world just becomes a better place.

I'm very happy that your sister got a great taste of New York. It's just such a spectacular place.

Updated On: 12/4/05 at 03:08 AM

[KelRel]

Posted: 12/4/05 at 3:10am

I have made some great connections through this board. Its nice to have someone to talk to when things get tough. I owe someone on this board a big thanks for being there for me recently.

[DG]

Posted: 12/4/05 at 3:26am

Aigoo - There is, of course, a distinction between those who remain just 'board buddies', and those who truly become a part of your life in the 'real' world. This particular situation involved someone who has transcended the parameters of this environment, and become what I am humbly honored to call my friend.

And I also think I'm just having a defensive posture to those who don't want to acknowledge that this opportunity for eschange can be anything other than remote and meaningless. My experience with many here does NOT fall into that catefory - especially this one.

And yes, I also am very happy my sister got the experience that she did. Given the circumstances of her own situation, it meant more than I could ever explain.

[Aigoo]

Posted: 12/4/05 at 3:28am

And you know, whether I deny it or not, BWW has helped me TREMENDOUSLY through a bumpy time. It may have been the people or the just general atmosphere. Message board or not, it sures is helpfuls.

Anyway. I'm tired. Believe it or not, I still have to wake up early tomorrow (today). Gooooonight!

[DG]

Posted: 12/4/05 at 3:29am

Restful and peaceful sleep to you, my dear

[Mamie]

Posted: 12/4/05 at 9:54am

I've got to agree with you DG. There are certainly a good share of stinkers out there, and a far larger group of folks who wish to remain no more than a screen name and an avatar. Then there are a few who take a chance and show a little bit of their hearts. They are rewarded with a little bit of heart from someone else and both lives are enriched! (I'm delighted your sister had such a good time in NY!)

[PalJoey]

Posted: 12/4/05 at 10:09am

People often say "It's just a message board" after they have behaved badly toward other posters.

Especially posters who pride themselves on behaving badly toward other posters.

[caitiesus1522]

Posted: 12/4/05 at 10:13am

I agree with you so much DG. BWW has been a blessing. I think what may make this community actually mostly a community of people that are friends and are there for each other is that we are theater people or theater fans. I have come to see that people involved in theater are the nicest people in the world, and the most willing to help out in times of need.

[Aigoo]

Posted: 12/4/05 at 10:17am

Pal-


I think those that use the "It's only a message board" excuse is after they realize the mistake they've made. However, due to the need for acceptance, they quickly use an excuse that puts them higher, or that disregards any relationship. This way, they are isolating themselves from the people they've made a mistake to and also feels of a higher position.

[luvtheEmcee]

Posted: 12/4/05 at 10:26am

I've also got to agree.

There are always people who think this is quite silly, and that it's "just a message board." My parents think it unsafe, but that's another story. I don't even know what to say for the importance of the friendships I've made here, but they are some of the most important, wonderful relationships in my life. That's nothing to shake a first at, 'cause it's real.

[Elphaba]

Posted: 12/4/05 at 10:36am

I also agree with DG.......but I need to add that in any social situation, real life or online....there will always be a-holes. And the trick is finding them out quickly and having nothing to do with them.....

[Rathnait62]

Posted: 12/4/05 at 10:38am

A message board is a group of people like any other. You will find the good, the not-so-good, and those with whom you end up having a real relationship.

[bwaysinger]

Posted: 12/4/05 at 10:51am

Just like to say, given the electronic age in which we live, this is an even better way to meet people with common interests.
Look at it from my point of view: I moved to NYC with a couple of friends from graduate school (most of whom I still maintain relationships with). I worked temp jobs. I wasn't going to meet people there. The bar scene in NYC isn't always that successful in making relationships either.
BWW is a great place to meet like-minded people. I've made some FANTASTIC friends here, people I'd say are my best friends. I've also made wonderful acquaintances. We don't always hang out constantly, but these are wonderful people whose personalities I adore, whose opinions I respect, and whom I love to be with when I can. And, when we canno, we always have PMs.
The problem with the world today (and a board like this) is the degree of attachment which can be, er, attached, to communicating in this manner. And it allows people to be very flippant about the relationships created or the disagreements which arise.

[liotte]

Posted: 12/4/05 at 10:56am

I agree that the message board is a wonderful place, and I am grateful to be able to chat with so many people. I have met quite a few board members, and most people are fantastic. Even those I have not met, but only talked to online, have made a positive impact on my life.
Updated On: 12/4/05 at 10:56 AM

[JerseyGirl2]

Posted: 12/4/05 at 11:45am

Over three years ago, I met my very best friend online. It wasn't through a message board, it was through a silly game. Everyone used to say, "It's just a game!" Some wonderful things come from "just a message board."

Posted: 12/4/05 at 1:42pm

PalJoey said : "People often say "It's just a message board" after they have behaved badly toward other posters.

Especially posters who pride themselves on behaving badly toward other posters."

OK Joey, would you like to be the Pot or the Kettle?

[PalJoey]

Posted: 12/4/05 at 2:10pm

As Dorothy said, "People come and go so quickly around here!"

Updated On: 12/4/05 at 02:10 PM

[Plum]

Posted: 12/4/05 at 3:04pm

I don't know. When telephones started popping up, did people denigrate that form of communication in favor of the greater thoroughness and thought-through quality of a letter? Maybe it's just another step in being suspicious of a new medium.

[shira467]

Posted: 12/4/05 at 6:59pm

This "just a message board" has had a spectacular impact on my life. In good ways.

[bdwaygirl]

Posted: 12/4/05 at 10:49pm

I've used the "it's just a message board" in a post here or there, mainly when people are sniping back and forth over very inconsequential things.

That said, I'm thankful for the friends I've made through BWW.

DG, very glad to hear your sister enjoyed her first visit to NY with the support of one of your BWW friends. Hope she plans to come back soon!

[JACXR71]

Posted: 12/4/05 at 10:57pm

I like this thread. It reminds me of the one from a while back, about message board friends being "real" friends
https://forum.broadwayworld.com/readmessage.cfm?boardname=off&thread=869013

I agree with the points that have been made - I think that a lot of the "disadvantages" that have been pointed out in terms of no real physical connection between people can actually be an advantage, especially when it comes to things like sharing personal feelings, or seeking advice. And if you do end up "meeting" someone you already "know" from the boards, I think the friendship has gotten that much more of a head start. I would venture to say that I'm at the same level with some of the posters here, whom I've never actually met, as I am with some of my "real" friends.