Me and Julio Down by the Schoolyard

[Weez]

Posted: 2/12/09 at 5:56pm

The mama pyjama rolled out of bed, and she ran to the police station. When papa found out, he began to shout, and started the investigation. And it's against the law. It was against the law. What the mama saw, it was against the law.

What *did* the mama see? What was I *doing* with Julio down by the schoolyard? Suggestions please!

[Mister Matt]

Posted: 2/12/09 at 6:06pm

Iglesias? Why, singing, of course.

[Unknown User]

Posted: 2/12/09 at 7:03pm

Even odder, Making love in the afternoon with Cecilia
Up in my bedroom
I got up to wash my face
When I come back to bed
Someones taken my place

I got up...TO WASH MY FACE? WTF was he doing to her?

[KrissySim]

Posted: 2/12/09 at 7:13pm

Well,Joey, it's called cunnilingus, it's Oral sex. When you grow up you'll understand. Now get back to the Disney channel and stay away from this adult stuff.

As for the other, Julio and he were smoking weed and having sex with a teenager Rosie, in Corona, Queens, NY.

[Unknown User]

Posted: 2/12/09 at 7:20pm

Really Krissy? Do you have a lot of yeast infections? Because in all my years of pleasing a woman orally, I've never felt the need to get up and wash my face in the midst of it. But maybe having such a gelatinous, oozing cooze that men flee to clean themselves midst coitus is what makes you so cranky?
Updated On: 2/12/09 at 07:20 PM

[StockardFan]

Posted: 2/12/09 at 7:23pm

Ewwww, Joe!

[KrissySim]

Posted: 2/12/09 at 7:25pm

Joe. That was gross.

It's a matter of technique.

[Reginald Tresilian]

Posted: 2/12/09 at 7:31pm

I think I stumbled into the wrong thread . . .

[KrissySim]

Posted: 2/12/09 at 7:33pm

I think so, too. And I haven't even been drinking Alaska Barley Wine Ale.

[StockardFan]

Posted: 2/12/09 at 9:13pm

Yeah, I need another glass of wine after clicking on this thread again.

[SNAFU]

Posted: 2/12/09 at 9:19pm

The one set of lyrics which I often wondered was a back handed insult are the ones that go: "Do that to me one more time, once is never enough with a man like you."

Huh? Was he just insulted or what!?!

[madbrian]

Posted: 2/12/09 at 10:22pm

As long as we're digressing to Captain & Tennille lyrics, I think Muskrat Love needs to be addressed (though the group America is responsible for the lyrics):

Muskrat, muskrat candlelight
Doin the town and doin it right
In the evenin
Its pretty pleasin

Muskrat susie, muskrat sam
Do the jitterbug out in muskrat land
And they shimmy
And sammys so skinny

And they whirled and they twirled and they tangoed
Singin and jingin the jango
Floatin like the heavens above
It looks like muskrat love

Nibbling on bacon, chewin on cheese
Sammy says to susie honey, would you please be my missus?
And she say yes
With her kisses

And now hes ticklin her fancy
Rubbin her toes
Muzzle to muzzle, now anything goes
As they wriggle, and sue starts to giggle

And they whirled and they twirled and they tangoed
Singin and jingin the jango
Floatin like the heavens above
It looks like muskrat love

[PalJoey]

Posted: 2/12/09 at 10:45pm

Okay, so who would leave a cake out in the rain, anyway?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QfL7Gk7Fpes

Spring was never waiting for us, dear.
It ran one step ahead,
As we followed in the dance...
Between the parted pages, we were pressed,
In love's hot, fevered iron,
Like a stri-ped pair of pants.

MacArthur Park is melting in the dark,
All the sweet, green icing flowing down!
Someone left my cake out in the rai-i-i-in!
I don't think that I can take it,
'Cause it took so long to bake it,
And I'll never have that recipe again!
Oh, noooooooooo!

I recall the yellow cotton dress,
Foaming like a wave,
On the ground around your knees.
The birds, like tender babies in your hands,
And the old men playing Chinese checkers by the trees.

MacArthur Park is melting in the dark,
All the sweet, green icing flowing down!
Someone left my cake out in the rai-i-i-i-n!
I don't think that I can take it,
'Cause it took so long to bake it,
And I'll never have that recipe again!
Oh, noooooooooooooooooooooooo!

There will be another song for me,
For I will si-i-i-ing it.
There will be another dream for me--
Someone will bri-i-i-ing it.
I will drink the wine while it is warm
And never let you catch me looking at the sun.
And after all the loves of my life,
After all the loves of my life,
You'll still be the one...

I will take my life into my hands,
And I will use it.
I will win the worship in your eyes,
And I will lose it!
I will have the things that I desire
And my passion flow, like rivers through the sky.
And after all the loves of my life,
After all the loves of my life,
You'll still be the one...
And I'll ask myself why.

MacArthur Park is melting in the dark!
All the sweet, green icing flowing down!
Someone left my cake out in the rain!
I don't think that I can take it!
'Cause it took so long to bake it,
And I'll never have that recipe again
Oh, noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

Updated On: 2/12/09 at 10:45 PM

[madbrian]

Posted: 2/12/09 at 10:54pm

I find a thread about bad song lyrics to be depressing. The only thing that can cheer me up is Gilbert O'Sullivan's Alone Again, Naturally:

In a little while from now
If I’m not feeling any less sour
I promise myself to treat myself
And visit a nearby tower
And climbing to the top will throw myself off
In an effort to make it clear to who
Ever what it’s like when you’re shattered
Left standing in the lurch at a church
Where people saying: "My God, that’s tough
She's stood him up"
No point in us remaining
We may as well go home
As I did on my own
Alone again, naturally

To think that only yesterday
I was cheerful, bright and gay
Looking forward to well wouldn’t do
The role I was about to play
But as if to knock me down
Reality came around
And without so much, as a mere touch
Cut me into little pieces
Leaving me to doubt
Talk about God and His mercy
Or if He really does exist
Why did He desert me in my hour of need
I truly am indeed Alone again, naturally

It seems to me that there are more hearts
broken in the world that can’t be mended
Left unattended
What do we do? What do we do?

Alone again, naturally
Now looking back over the years
And whatever else that appears
I remember I cried when my father died
Never wishing to hide the tears
And at sixty-five years old
My mother, God rest her soul,
Couldn’t understand why the only man
She had ever loved had been taken
Leaving her to start with a heart so badly broken
Despite encouragement from me
No words were ever spoken
And when she passed away
I cried and cried all day
Alone again, naturally
Alone again, naturally

[papalovesmambo]

Posted: 2/13/09 at 9:05am

oh joe, who cares about humans. the wolves love the taste of the gelatinous, oozing cooze. and the crankiness is a small price to pay for being able to keep her canine casanovas coming back for more.

[Unknown User]

Posted: 2/13/09 at 10:37am

I guess that would help keep the peanut butter bills down.
Updated On: 2/13/09 at 10:37 AM

[Phyllis Rogers Stone]

Posted: 2/13/09 at 10:52am

"We can do it tell we both wake up." - Color Me Badd

[Borstalboy]

Posted: 2/13/09 at 10:55am

I seem to remember Simon saying that what Mama saw was something homosexual. I love "Me & Julio"..its one of my favorites of Paul Simon.