Musto's Blind Items 1/20

[Borstalboy]

Posted: 1/20/10 at 1:54pm

And now, please keep your hand on the clicker and continue to scroll away as I deliver those naughty blind items I so reputably promised. Yes, I'm keeping my word, my reward being that these will surely drive you crazier than a Christopher Walken character:

Which "man on the street" from TV went to View Bar (a gay establishment in Chelsea), but fled out of view the second he was recognized by staff and customers? Which co-star of that Emmy-winning cable series was too hungover to deal with the limo and makeup artist sent for her by a designer whose show she was supposed to attend? (She sent them back twice and stayed in, desperately trying to recover.) Who's been known to behave inappropriately at that vineyard, urging young girls to sit on his lap for some real juicing?

Which pretentious style-queen screamed at a famed photographer during Fashion Week, "No more pictures! Everyone wants to take my picture! And it'll just be a small picture in the magazine anyway!"? What writer for the same corporation was caught stealing five pillowcases at a party, saying, when caught, "I thought we were supposed to take them"? Which saucy drag queen advertises on Craigslist as a cross-dresser in need of serious black dick? Which one doesn't?

Which vampirey star hangs with high school kids and likes to go to their houses and intake lots of pot? Which middle-aged sitcom star can be spotted regularly on the 104 bus, chatting with his favorite person--himself? Which '50s singer used to be seen at dinners with the wife, where he'd cover his head when a hot waiter would walk by so as not to be led into temptation? Which rocker married to a rising actress cheated at least once that I know of?

Which girlfriend (among many) of that bedraggled sports figure supposedly once dated a cable host, but nobly dumped him so she could be more loyal to her then-fiance? Which editor celebrated with management that they'd gotten "over the hump," even though the bloodbath was far from over? Which designer nabbed so many rich men on the way up partly because she gives the most amazing head in Christendom? Which married gay insists on clear ice cubes only in his drinks and everyone's afraid to ask him why?

Which Tony winner made up most of the stories she so lovingly told in that tribute show? Which other Tony winner privately admits that working with that fish-out-of-water music star was a bit of a nightmare? Which bi-racial star's daughter was approached by a writer who told her, "I interviewed your father," only to have her reply, "We f**king hated that article!"? Which separated Oscar winner supposedly got f**ked by a trannie, but gingerly told her, "Put two condoms on that"? How can you argue with that kind of fortitude?

And, finally, let me use names here: A holy person who lived in the Vatican swears to me that Joe Ratzinger, a/k/a Pope Benedict XVI, has a "mesmerizingly beautiful" male assistant, and no one's quite sure what their relationship consists of. Lots of praying on their knees, I'd imagine. Whoops! I guess that Boys in the Band character is not the only Michael who talks too much.
Whole shebang here

[Gothampc]

Posted: 1/20/10 at 2:37pm

"Which Tony winner made up most of the stories she so lovingly told in that tribute show?"

Stritch

"Which other Tony winner privately admits that working with that fish-out-of-water music star was a bit of a nightmare?"

Alan Cumming/Cyndi Lauper

[Jordan Catalano]

Posted: 1/20/10 at 2:41pm

"Which bi-racial star's daughter was approached by a writer who told her, "I interviewed your father," only to have her reply, "We f**king hated that article!"? "

Sounds like Nicole Richie

[wexy]

Posted: 1/20/10 at 9:19pm

Saw Musto last Friday at the"Present Laughter" preview.

[Dollypop]

Posted: 1/20/10 at 9:28pm

Wexy, if you saw Musto in person, you should have handed him a copy of Warriner's Grammar Book. I would have.

There's only one person who writes worse than Musto: Corine Dana Cohen.

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 1/21/10 at 10:56am

Come on. There have been several times when I have resisted the urge to get out my red pen when reading one of your very detailed interviews but I didn't want to mark up my computer screen. And I never said anything about it, but now you've gone too far.