Musto's hilarious take on the Oscars

[jrb_actor]

Posted: 3/8/06 at 7:48pm

yes, ANOTHER Oscar thread, but this one is HILARIOUS!

http://www.villagevoice.com/nyclife/0610,musto,72420,15.html

Updated On: 3/8/06 at 07:48 PM

[jrb_actor]

Posted: 3/8/06 at 8:39pm

my faves:

"JON STEWART is amiable enough, but he seems self-defeatingly low-key and as declawed as SIEGFRIED AND ROY's new pets. Nabbing him as host and not letting him rip into the administration even once is like hiring SARAH SILVERMAN to write greeting cards or KATHY GRIFFIN to hostess a massage parlor. Sick!"

"Most annoying of all is the orchestral music blaring the second the winners start speaking. It makes it sound as if the trophy holders are voicing over a Glade commercial. Soon enough, perhaps, they will be."

"It's a good thing the March of the Penguins people won or they'd be sitting there all night with those penguin puppets, looking like complete assholes."

"The Crash song's production number is very Lilith Fair meets Cirque du So-lame crossed with a Great White concert via a dinner theater production of Medea. Make it stop, Jon."

[jrb_actor]

Posted: 3/10/06 at 2:45am

It's freaking Musto! Read! Respond! Laugh!

[Kringas]

Posted: 3/10/06 at 2:50am

I'll respond, but I won't laugh (Musto has just never done it for me). I did like Don Roos's quote, though.

"I was so irritated by those stupid, stupid cowboys . . . It's the perfect film for the BUSH years: 'Don't be gay, America!' It's the kind of movie that makes you glad to be straight. Is that the kind of movie we should be rewarding people for? It's an anti-gay film!"

[SueleenGay]

Posted: 3/10/06 at 2:56am

Musto is a GOD.

[Kringas]

Posted: 3/10/06 at 2:58am

So I've read.

[Roninjoey]

Posted: 3/10/06 at 2:59am

I read it. It was funny.

[gertrudejessalynn]

Posted: 3/10/06 at 3:04am

Oscar, I wish I knew how to quit you.

I laughed A LOT. (That might be because it's three a.m., hmm.)

[BroadwayChica]

Posted: 3/10/06 at 3:17am

I thought it was hilarious. But, yeah, it IS 3 am. Pretty much anything would sound hilarious to me in this state. :p

[gettinhep]

Posted: 3/10/06 at 4:29am

I laughed, too. But, I'm on cold medication. The Oscar show itself would be hilarious to me right now. You remember the Oscars - ten minutes of sparkling entertainment packed into a four hour show.

[BroadwayChica]

Posted: 3/10/06 at 7:53am

Wait, there were ten whole minutes of entertainment? I must've missed that!

[Jon]

Posted: 3/10/06 at 9:34am

Don Roos also has been quoted as saying, "Hadn't either of these two idiots ever seen a MAP? If they had just moved to New York City or San Francisco, they could have lived happily ever after!"

Also, the reason Don Knotts (and Darrin McGavin and Dennis Weaver) were not in the death montage is that is only covered the year 2005. Those three will be in next year's montage.

[Lamc16]

Posted: 3/10/06 at 9:38am

he was pretty bad which was a dissapointment. but speaking of sarah silverman, she was absolutely HILARIOUS when she hosted the spirit awards!