Obama Answers the Two Big Gay Questions: Marriage and DADT

[PalJoey]

Posted: 10/27/10 at 11:25pm

Joe Sudbay from AmericaBlog attended President Obama's meeting with progressive bloggers and asked him about marriage and DADT.

First, Obama answers the marriage question:

===

Q So I have another gay question. (Laughter.)

THE PRESIDENT: It’s okay, man. (Laughter.)

Q And this one is on the issue of marriage. Since you’ve become President, a lot has changed. More states have passed marriage equality laws. This summer a federal judge declared DOMA unconstitutional in two different cases. A judge in San Francisco declared Prop 8 was unconstitutional. And I know during the campaign you often said you thought marriage was the union between a man and a woman, and there -- like I said, when you look at public opinion polling, it’s heading in the right direction. We’ve actually got Republicans like Ted Olson and even Ken Mehlman on our side now. So I just really want to know what is your position on same-sex marriage?

THE PRESIDENT: Joe, I do not intend to make big news sitting here with the five of you, as wonderful as you guys are. (Laughter.) But I’ll say this --

Q I just want to say, I would be remiss if I didn’t ask you this question.

THE PRESIDENT: Of course.

Q People in our community are really desperate to know.

THE PRESIDENT: I think it’s a fair question to ask. I think that -- I am a strong supporter of civil unions. As you say, I have been to this point unwilling to sign on to same-sex marriage primarily because of my understandings of the traditional definitions of marriage.

But I also think you’re right that attitudes evolve, including mine. And I think that it is an issue that I wrestle with and think about because I have a whole host of friends who are in gay partnerships. I have staff members who are in committed, monogamous relationships, who are raising children, who are wonderful parents.

And I care about them deeply. And so while I’m not prepared to reverse myself here, sitting in the Roosevelt Room at 3:30 in the afternoon, I think it’s fair to say that it’s something that I think a lot about. That’s probably the best you’ll do out of me today. (Laughter.)

Q It is an important issue, and I think that --

THE PRESIDENT: I think it’s an entirely fair question to ask.

Q And part of it is that you can’t be equal in this country if the very core of who you are as a person and the love -- the person you love is not -- if that relationship isn’t the same as everybody else’s, then we’re not equal. And I think that a lot of -- particularly in the wake of the California election on Prop 8, a lot of gay people realized we’re not equal. And I think that that’s -- that’s been part of the change in the --

THE PRESIDENT: Prop 8, which I opposed.

Q Right. I remember you did. You sent the letter and that was great. I think that the level of intensity in the LGBT community changed after we lost rights in that election. And I think that’s a lot of where the community is right now.

THE PRESIDENT: The one thing I will say today is I think it’s pretty clear where the trendlines are going.

Q The arc of history.

THE PRESIDENT: The arc of history.

[PalJoey]

Posted: 10/27/10 at 11:27pm

And DADT (which actually came first in the meeting):

===

Q ...There is a certain amount of disillusionment and disappointment in our community right now.

And one of the things I’d like to ask you -- and I think it’s a simple yes or no question too -- is do you think that “don’t ask, don’t tell” is unconstitutional?

THE PRESIDENT: It’s not a simple yes or no question, because I’m not sitting on the Supreme Court. And I’ve got to be careful, as President of the United States, to make sure that when I’m making pronouncements about laws that Congress passed I don’t do so just off the top of my head.

I think that -- but here’s what I can say. I think “don’t ask, don’t tell” is wrong. I think it doesn’t serve our national security, which is why I want it overturned. I think that the best way to overturn it is for Congress to act. In theory, we should be able to get 60 votes out of the Senate. The House has already passed it. And I’ve gotten the Secretary of Defense and the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff to say that they think this policy needs to be overturned -- something that’s unprecedented.

And so my hope and expectation is, is that we get this law passed. It is not just harmful to the brave men and women who are serving, and in some cases have been discharged unjustly, but it doesn’t serve our interests -- and I speak as Commander-in-Chief on that issue.

Let me go to the larger issue, though, Joe, about disillusionment and disappointment. I guess my attitude is that we have been as vocal, as supportive of the LGBT community as any President in history. I’ve appointed more openly gay people to more positions in this government than any President in history. We have moved forward on a whole range of issues that were directly under my control, including, for example, hospital visitation.

On “don’t ask, don’t tell,” I have been as systematic and methodical in trying to move that agenda forward as I could be given my legal constraints, given that Congress had explicitly passed a law designed to tie my hands on the issue.

And so, I’ll be honest with you, I don’t think that the disillusionment is justified.

Now, I say that as somebody who appreciates that the LGBT community very legitimately feels these issues in very personal terms. So it’s not my place to counsel patience. One of my favorite pieces of literature is “Letter from Birmingham Jail,” and Dr. King had to battle people counseling patience and time. And he rightly said that time is neutral. And things don’t automatically get better unless people push to try to get things better.

So I don’t begrudge the LGBT community pushing, but the flip side of it is that this notion somehow that this administration has been a source of disappointment to the LGBT community, as opposed to a stalwart ally of the LGBT community, I think is wrong.

Transcript of Q and A with the President about DADT and Same-sex marriage

Updated On: 10/27/10 at 11:27 PM

[GlindatheGood22]

Posted: 10/27/10 at 11:44pm

"So I don’t begrudge the LGBT community pushing, but the flip side of it is that this notion somehow that this administration has been a source of disappointment to the LGBT community, as opposed to a stalwart ally of the LGBT community, I think is wrong."

I'm an Obama fan, but stalwart ally my ass.

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 10/27/10 at 11:50pm

"In theory, we should be able to get 60 votes out of the Senate."

Why does my gay brain translate this as, "So if we do, GREAT, but if we don't, they won't be able to use active advocacy on my part against me during my re-election campaign, because I won't have done any!"?

[adamgreer]

Posted: 10/28/10 at 12:26am

Our fierce advocate, off fiercely advocating again!

The more he talks about these issues, the less I like him.

We should have went with Hillary.

[NYadgal]

Posted: 10/28/10 at 4:48am

I never liked him.

I had HOPE that there would be a better future, when he was elected. I SUPPORTED him, and joined in with the celebration of 'victory' that we all believed would lead us down the right path.

But, I never liked him. And I no longer have hope for him.

[toanythingtaboo 2]

Posted: 10/28/10 at 5:49am

I really wish an interviewer would put formalities aside and point out the flaws in his 'traditional marriage' explanation. There's gaping holes in that reasoning.

We all debate it online, at home, on tv, but nobody cuts the bull**** and has it out with the man himself.

[Luscious]

Posted: 10/28/10 at 6:34am

All this pu$$y-footing around and side-step dancing has put me in the mood to watch Best Little Whorehouse in Texas.

Updated On: 10/28/10 at 06:34 AM

[Roscoe]

Posted: 10/28/10 at 9:15am

I find it impossible to believe that Hillary, or any Democrat, would have done it any differently than Obama.

I wish someone had pointed out Obama's previous support of same-sex marriage, as opposed to his current opposition of the matter, and asked for Obama to explain exactly what it was that changed his mind.

[Phyllis Rogers Stone]

Posted: 10/28/10 at 11:49am

I wish someone had pointed out Obama's previous support of same-sex marriage, as opposed to his current opposition of the matter, and asked for Obama to explain exactly what it was that changed his mind.

Amen.

[Q]

Posted: 10/28/10 at 12:54pm

His mind didn't change - his election needs did.

[Phyllis Rogers Stone]

Posted: 10/28/10 at 12:56pm

Sure, but it's tomato, tomahto. He'd never say that. He said "God is in the mix" so we have to take him at his word.

[toanythingtaboo 2]

Posted: 10/28/10 at 1:01pm

^ Well clearly, but it would have been entertaining to see him squirm out of that one and possibly the media backlash afterwards.

[Gothampc]

Posted: 10/28/10 at 1:15pm

Charles Durning Said It Best

[Phyllis Rogers Stone]

Posted: 10/28/10 at 1:18pm

And Luscious beat you to it.

[Gothampc]

Posted: 10/28/10 at 1:21pm

"And Luscious beat you to it."

I don't always read all the responses. The voices in my head tell me which ones to ignore.

[Unknown User]

Posted: 10/28/10 at 1:23pm

And here I though you only ignored the ones that pointed out how wrong you are.

[PalJoey]

Posted: 10/28/10 at 3:43pm

How do you feel about the president's responses, Joe? Are you satisfied with them?

[Unknown User]

Posted: 10/28/10 at 3:53pm

Satisfied? That's a hard word to apply to this situation. Despite accusations to the contrary, I understand folk's frustration with these fights not being won (Yet). But I do think we have infinitely better chances under Obama than under Boehner or Huckabee.


Edited to correct "infinity" to infinitely- thanks Namo Updated On: 10/28/10 at 03:53 PM

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 10/28/10 at 4:01pm

Even if you meant "infinitely" I would say that's optimistic as hell.

I find it depressing to look for the bright side between "he never said he would" and "they always said they wouldn't."

[Unknown User]

Posted: 10/28/10 at 4:21pm

Thanks for spotting my sloppy spell-check corrections. I should never type while I'm on the phone.

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 10/28/10 at 4:32pm

I am too.