Quoth "The Simpsons"- Page 2

[cabarethed]

Posted: 8/26/04 at 1:31am

Homer: "Helloooo...my name is Mr. Burns. I believe you have a letter for me."
Post Office: "Ok Mr Burns, what's your first name?"
Homer: "...I don't know..."

Milhouse: "Let's go crazy Broadway style!"

"Simpson, Homer Simpson, he's the greatest guy in history. From the town of Springfield, he's about to hit a chestnut tree....d'oh!!"

The John Waters one is so classic. I can't even begin to start quoting. Same with Cape Feare.

FBI: "Ok, so your name is going to be Homer Thompson. When I say Hello Mr Thompson, you say hello."
Homer: "Ok."
FBI: "Hello Mr Thompson."
Homer: "...*silence*..."
FBI: "Remember, your name is Mr. Thompson."
Homer: "Got it."
FBI: "Hello Mr Thompson."
Homer: "...*silence*..."
FBI: (1 hour later) "Ok, so when I say Hello Mr Thompson and stamp on your foot, you'll say hello, ok?"
Homer: "Got it."
FBI: "Hello Mr Thompson. *stamp stamp stamp*
Homer: *looks down, turns to other agent and stage whispers* "I think he's talking to YOU!"

[Jon]

Posted: 8/26/04 at 8:58am

Homer: (driving into a tree to avoid a deer) D'OH!
Lisa: A deer!
Marge: A female deer!

[popcultureboy]

Posted: 8/26/04 at 9:18am

Lisa: It was a rhetorical question.
Homer: I knew that.
Lisa: Dad, do you even know what rhetorical means?
Homer: Oh, do I know what rhetorical means?

[lildogs]

Posted: 8/26/04 at 10:54am

Moe: (on receiving a time travel device) Now I'm off to find some caveman hookers.

The entire "Sherry Bobbins" episode....

Marge: They were staring at me....with their EYES...

Marge: Homer, have you been up all night eating cheese?
Homer: I think I'm blind.

btw, Blue Wizard, you have my deep respect, my friend. :)

[emonkeygirl]

Posted: 8/26/04 at 11:36am

"Ach! My Eyes! The goggles do nothing."

&

Ralphie asks his dad how long he has to wear plastic underpants, Chief Wiggum replies, "You wear them 'til you learn, Ralph. You wear them 'til you learn."

[BlueWizard]

Posted: 8/27/04 at 1:26am

btw, Blue Wizard, you have my deep respect, my friend. :)

Did I mention I love the Simpsons?


"Smithers! Release the robotic Richard Simmons!"

Updated On: 8/27/04 at 01:26 AM

[BlueWizard]

Posted: 8/27/04 at 1:27am

HOMER: "I'm not usually a praying man, but please, save me, Superman!"

[BlueWizard]

Posted: 8/27/04 at 1:29am

BART: "I'm on TV. It's my job to be repetitive! My job! My job! Repetitiveness is my job! I'm gonna go out there and give the best performance of my life!"

MARGE: "The bets performance of your life?"

BART: "The best performance of my life!"

[magruder]

Posted: 8/27/04 at 3:29am

Marge: All my life, I wanted to be in a Broadway audience.

[lildogs]

Posted: 8/27/04 at 2:20pm

not much of a quote, but when Troy announces his engagement to Selma at a performance of "Stop the Planet of the Apes--I Want to Get Off!" and Homer yells to Selma: "Down in front!"

or to Apu's offer of a 10% discount on expired baby food: "Sold!"

Apu: I used to this think all this karma was baloney but now i am not so sure.

Homer: Hmmm. Caramel baloney.



or...

Snake: You can watch me while i pistol-whip this dude.
Homer: Hmmm...Pistol-Whip (dreaming of a Cool-Whip-like goo)