Same-Sex Invitation Etiquette

[Luscious]

Posted: 6/18/10 at 5:30pm

I want to send out an invitation and I have “You and your spouse are cordially invited to attend…”. Is the term “spouse” politically correct and inclusive to same sex relationships and/or people who are partnered but not married? Suggestions?

[jrb_actor]

Posted: 6/18/10 at 5:31pm

Perhaps you could use "You and a guest". That keeps it very generic--includes single friends.

[StockardFan]

Posted: 6/18/10 at 5:32pm

Spouse is appropriate if a couple is married or had a commitment ceremony I guess. But what if the couple is just dating? Then it doesn't seem right? I'm not sure how you should word it?

[Phyllis Rogers Stone]

Posted: 6/18/10 at 5:33pm

Yeah, I would say you and a guest.

[jrb_actor]

Posted: 6/18/10 at 5:35pm

Or perhaps "Bring yo bitch"?

[HellsBells2]

Posted: 6/18/10 at 5:36pm

how about - you and your partner or you and your life partner?

[Luscious]

Posted: 6/18/10 at 5:38pm

"Perhaps you could use "You and a guest". That keeps it very generic--includes single friends."

I don't want to open it up to "guests" unless it's their husband, wife, or domestic partner. I don't want people bringing friends, etc.

[Phyllis Rogers Stone]

Posted: 6/18/10 at 5:41pm

Then you're going to have to spell it out. Or only invite people who have husbands, wives or domestic partners. Or address the invite to both parties in the couple.
Updated On: 6/18/10 at 05:41 PM

[jrb_actor]

Posted: 6/18/10 at 5:47pm

That's going to be tricky expecting single friends not to bring a a guest. Few people like going alone to weddings.

[Phyllis Rogers Stone]

Posted: 6/18/10 at 5:51pm

I don't know that it's a wedding? Is it? But Jerby is still right. If you're having an affair with cordial invitations, it's kind of tacky to tell the unmarried/unpartnered they can't bring a date.

[jrb_actor]

Posted: 6/18/10 at 5:53pm

Oh, you are right. I've got wedding on the brain.

Honey, if it's an orgy, that should fine.

[Luscious]

Posted: 6/18/10 at 5:57pm

"Honey, if it's an orgy, that should fine."

LOL! It's neither a wedding nor an orgy. I think I'll just go with spouse/partner. Although I liked the "bring yo bitch" suggestion.

[PalJoey]

Posted: 6/18/10 at 6:18pm

Why are you inviting only partnered people?

How long do they have to be going out to qualify for an invitation?

[Luscious]

Posted: 6/18/10 at 6:33pm

They have to be married or partnered (gay or straight), as in living together. I don't want people bringing family members, casual friends, tricks or f*@k buddies. It's a "couples" party... as in betrothed ... either legally and/or spiritually.

Updated On: 6/18/10 at 06:33 PM

[Reginald Tresilian]

Posted: 6/18/10 at 7:35pm

Then be very specific and very understanding when unpartnered (in your mind) friends decline.

I know several couples who have been together for years without living together. So make sure you're clear that partners such as this are unwelcome.

Good luck.

[TheatreFan4]

Posted: 6/18/10 at 7:36pm

How about "Significant Other"?

[Luscious]

Posted: 6/18/10 at 7:43pm

"I know several couples who have been together for years without living together."

Do they consider themselves "maarried", or just dating? Because, trust me, when you're "married", you know it! LOL!

Updated On: 6/18/10 at 07:43 PM

[Phyllis Rogers Stone]

Posted: 6/18/10 at 8:17pm

Then just say couples only.

Or call them. And tell them not to tell your single friends that you're having a party.

[AngryPirate]

Posted: 6/18/10 at 8:22pm

Swingers party. Sweet.

[Phyllis Rogers Stone]

Posted: 6/18/10 at 8:25pm

What if one can attend but his spouse can't?

[Reginald Tresilian]

Posted: 6/18/10 at 8:45pm

"Do they consider themselves "maarried", or just dating? Because, trust me, when you're "married", you know it!"

I guess I take my cues from them rather than taking it upon myself to determine whether they're a couple or not.

[Luscious]

Posted: 6/18/10 at 9:03pm

"I guess I take my cues from them rather than taking it upon myself to determine whether they're a couple or not."

I'm not taking it upon myself to determine anything for anyone. If they consider themselves "married", then that's good enough for me. Maybe living together shouldn't be a qualifier, but generally speaking, if a couple chooses to live apart it indicates to me that they haven't made that final commitment to each other. But I can definitely see the benefits in it!

Updated On: 6/18/10 at 09:03 PM

[dramamama611]

Posted: 6/18/10 at 10:46pm

TECHNICALLY: WHO is invited is on the envelope.

Ms Smith and Guest

Mr and Mrs Smith

Sue Smith and Beth Lewis

The invitation itself doesn't state who is invited so that it applies to singles or couples.

[TheatreDiva90016]

Posted: 6/18/10 at 11:19pm

"Ball and Chain only"

Updated On: 6/18/10 at 11:19 PM

[StockardFan]

Posted: 6/19/10 at 2:22am

LOL, Diva!