Self-Hatred Expressed As Hostility Toward Others and Homosexuality

[nomdeplume]

Posted: 12/16/06 at 5:37pm

When you see someone venting and spewing hostility on others, often the cause is their own self-hatred.

Unfortunately with certain posters you see it being expressed through these boards.

Homosexuals who have not come to terms with who they are and decided it is okay to be what they are and love themselves and love others can engage in this behavior.

And I suppose we can choose to feel sorry for them, or choose to face them and what they do and demand that they grow up and go out and seek psychological help to become a better person. I think that while confronting people about this subject may be hard, it may also be the best thing to do because it exposes their behavior for what it is. And that it is their choice and their behavior.

It is better to call it for what it is rather than let there be confusion as to what is generating this behavior.

[cturtle]

Posted: 12/16/06 at 5:42pm

or you can totally ignore them.

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 12/16/06 at 5:47pm

"And that it is their choice and their behavior."

So you're saying homosexuality is a choice? That's interesting. I'm sure a lot of the gay men on this board will just have to agree to disagree with you on that one, nome. After all, that's what the Rev. Ted Haggard said too, and we all know how that turned out.

Updated On: 12/16/06 at 05:47 PM

[nomdeplume]

Posted: 12/16/06 at 5:49pm

Yes, cturtle, there are choices. I respect yours.

I've chosen what I think best.

And the reason why is because I have faith in the human soul to engage in retrospective self-questioning. I believe people can improve and better themselves, but they have to know what the problem is and deal with it.

And for older homosexuals who grew up in more represseive surroundings, God knows what torture they went through decades ago. It makes me think of my Catholic Aunt who'd say things like "to know all is to forgive all." The scars of humilations of the past that they may have suffered through. The fear of being outed and perhaps beaten. Of being betrayed. Maybe even having been beaten.

But life is now and you can choose to let the pain go and move forward and to STOP venting your pain on others.

[SueleenGay]

Posted: 12/16/06 at 5:51pm

Is the Dr. Phil show on DVD yet?

[nomdeplume]

Posted: 12/16/06 at 5:52pm

Namo, I am saying that how someone chooses to act toward themselves and others is a choice.

It can be hard to force yourself to do the right thing if you are hurt or in pain, but that is the adult choice of self-mastery.

Not whether one's nature is homosexual or hetero or something else.

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 12/16/06 at 5:52pm

I think many of your points might be good ones, nome, but you need an editor to help bring your writing into focus.

For example, when you wrote, "engage in retrospective self-questioning...," I think you might have meant "introspective."

This group of phrases, while dramatic, is redundant:

"The fear of being outed and perhaps beaten. Of being betrayed. Maybe even having been beaten."

You might want to incorporate those suggestions and work them into your next draft. After all, you can choose to improve and better your writing, right this very minute!

[nomdeplume]

Posted: 12/16/06 at 5:56pm

And you, Namo, should take everything I have to say to heart.

I do not have time or interest in hating people. Life is too short.

I have almost lost my life twice so I work hard to value life.

Aren't there some kind acts you can do for your fellow posters on here, Namo, that are more worthy of your investment of time and intelligence level?

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 12/16/06 at 6:00pm

Nah, I prefer to puff up and be bitchy and critical and big for my britches like you were being in the curtain call thread until you melted down faster than Margaret Hamilton!

[nomdeplume]

Posted: 12/16/06 at 6:02pm

You don't fool me.

You are a scared little boy on the inside.

What are you afraid of?

Death?

Growing old?

Losing your desirability?

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 12/16/06 at 6:05pm

"Death?"

Not really. Although I'm not that keen on dying.

"Growing old?"

Not in the least. It beats the alternative.

"Losing your desirability?"

Not at all. I never met anybody who wasn't the object of desire for some specialized niche market somewhere. And I know just where to find those markets the minute the need should arise.

Phew! Thanks, Dr. nome, I feel a lot better!

Updated On: 12/16/06 at 06:05 PM

[Rose_MacShane]

Posted: 12/16/06 at 6:07pm

What the f**k? When did this place become group therapy?

[PalJoey]

Posted: 12/16/06 at 6:07pm

Not at all. I never met anybody who wasn't the object of desire for some specialized niche market somewhere. And I know just where to find those markets the minute the need should arrive.

Where?

[nomdeplume]

Posted: 12/16/06 at 6:07pm

So you say, but I do not believe you.

Why do you dislike yourself?

Because you do or you would have no need to insult others.

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 12/16/06 at 6:09pm

Rose, don't be resistant! C'mere and lemme give ya a hug. Dr. nome is here to help us!

[nomdeplume]

Posted: 12/16/06 at 6:10pm

When you insult people, Namo, you are trying to get my attention.

Here. You have my attention.

Why do you hate yourself?

Why are you so much worse than any other human that you have to hate yourself?

[Rose_MacShane]

Posted: 12/16/06 at 6:10pm

It's a pseudo-science! You're glib!!

[nomdeplume]

Posted: 12/16/06 at 6:12pm

It's a straight-forward question, Namo, can you answer it?

Why do you hate yourself?

[ljay889]

Posted: 12/16/06 at 6:13pm

This thread is scary.

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 12/16/06 at 6:14pm

"When you insult people, Namo, you are trying to get my attention."

When I insult people I am trying to get your attention? No. That makes zero sense, unless you're starting a cult for yourself and not an amateur therapy practice.

I suppose it's just more unclear writing from you. Why not try the Gotham Writers' Workshop to sharpen your skills? I'm sure you can take classes online, since you seem very concerned that nobody knows who you are!

[nomdeplume]

Posted: 12/16/06 at 6:16pm

A person who hates themself is scary until they grow up.

What have you done that is so terrible, Namo?

Did you kill or maim anyone?

Did someone withdraw love from you and you hated yourself as a result?

Why do you feel the need to insult people?

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 12/16/06 at 6:19pm

"A person who hates themself .."

Please, please, please. You criticize the writer of the curtain call as being uneducated and then you write a phrase like that! It's just horrible. Like nails down a blackboard. Nome, you've gotta get the fundamentals down.

[nomdeplume]

Posted: 12/16/06 at 6:22pm

It's too personal for you to answer, Namo?

You don't hesitate to discuss any subject.

Why is it that you hate yourself?

Were you so tortured growing up that you can't get over it?

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 12/16/06 at 6:27pm

Here ya go, nome!

I don't hate myself, at all. I actually quite like myself. Though I do admit that I do not suffer fools gladly. Once I became an adult and acquired the tools, the skills, and the analytical powers to not have to do so anymore, I didn't.

Which is, I guess, where you come in. And go out.

[papalovesmambo]

Posted: 12/16/06 at 6:35pm

so are all homosexuals angry or just the ones around here?