The Hardcore Gay Fanatics Thread!

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 12/28/03 at 11:13am

This thread is for Hardcore Gay Fanatics only! No contributions from non-Hardcore Gay Fanatics are welcome in this thread. (And that goes double for you, Judith Martin.)

How Hardcore are you? When I get up in the morning and go into the kitchen to pour myself a bowl of Post Select Blueberry Morning and a piping hot cup of Fair Trade Jamaican Blue Mountain Grown Coffee, I open the window in my kitchen and yell outside, "I'm Gay! Do you hear me, straight world? I'm GAY and you WILL know this!!"

That's how Hardcore I am. How about you?

[DofB5]

Posted: 12/28/03 at 11:22am

And depending on what time of the morning you do this at, I'm sure your neighbors yell back, "Shut up, Namo--It's Sunday and we're trying to sleep in!"

D

[broadwayguy2]

Posted: 12/28/03 at 11:23am

**waves hand** I am a hardcore homo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 12/28/03 at 11:24am

I'LL say you are, BG2. Please share with the class how Hardcore you are.

The neighbors do yell on Sunday mornings, D, but I do not care, because that is how Hardcore I am. And slowly but surely, their taunts evolve to, "We know, we love your gay self, now let us go back to sleep." And that is how Hardcore Gay Fanaticism changes the world.

If you'd like, D, you may join the Hardcore Gay Fanatics Auxilliary.

[DofB5]

Posted: 12/28/03 at 11:31am

I would be honored but I'm not yelling anything first thing in the morning.

D

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 12/28/03 at 11:34am

Hardcore often involves yelling. I just added the morning thing to my routine to show how Hardcore I am. This isn't a requirement of the auxilliary.

[DofB5]

Posted: 12/28/03 at 11:45am

Great! Works for me. I'm not into yelling. I'm into sleep. Sleep is good.

D

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 12/28/03 at 11:46am

The Hardcore Gay Fanatics appreciate a well rested auxilliary.

[lassy]

Posted: 12/28/03 at 12:31pm

I'd like to be a member of the auxilliary. I used to fall in love with gay men all the time. Plus, I haven't yelled at anyone for ages. What should I holler out my window and who should I holler at?

Are there any special auxilliary initiation rites?

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 12/28/03 at 12:35pm

This would be helpful: "MY FELLOW STRAIGHT PEOPLE. ASK YOURSELVES: WHERE WOULD WE BE WITHOUT THE GAYS?"

You could then list ways in which the world would be a terrible place without gay men and lesbians. YAY!

[Auggie27]

Posted: 12/28/03 at 1:21pm

I'm sorry, but Post Select Blueberry morning, frankly, is a straight cereal. Worse, a straight man cereal. In fact, cereal itself, even granola with wild raspberries and organic pecans, is a straight way to start the day, Namo. The culinary equivalent of a leisure suit. You need something hot and fresh-baked from your oven. Even a toaster oven, which admittedly is a straight appliance. Please make adjustments accordingly, and THEN open your window and yell. You'll find your voice has new gay authority.

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 12/28/03 at 2:09pm

THANK YOU for the integrity check! It's hard to remain a Hardcore Gay Fanatic without our giving each other these fierce moral checks and balances.

[orion59]

Posted: 12/28/03 at 3:20pm

I guess I must be a hardcore fanatic since I start my day with a multi-vitamin/mineral powder disolved in soy milk, hit the gym for an ab class and a buns of steel class, apply my hair products from back to front and always make sure that my cologne matches not only my mood but also the activities of the day.

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 12/28/03 at 3:29pm

S.D.W.A.

(spray, delay, walk away)

[BwayTheatre11]

Posted: 12/28/03 at 6:44pm

Namo, you can be more hardcore than that!!

[iflitifloat]

Posted: 12/28/03 at 7:31pm

"You could then list ways in which the world would be a terrible place without gay men and lesbians."

Okay. How's this? A lesbian couple down the street tried their hand at matchmaking and introduced me to a single male that one member of the couple was friends with. "He's divorced and a vegetarian...but he's one of Karen's computer friends, so the nerd factor could be pretty high" was the initial description. Much to everyone's amazement (most of all, mine), we've been together since 1993. This may not have made *the* world a better place, but it certainly improved mine dramatically.

[Unknown User]

Posted: 12/28/03 at 8:23pm

Gays have indeed improved the quality of life thoughout the ages. I'm no way any expert but I did read one theory that it was only in the last few centuries that homosexuality was forbidden/policed for religious socio-economic reasons. (You gotta love us Catholics, for believing ourselves to be right on so many things while being so wrong on others!)

Fanatics also started the Inquistion and the Holocaust so fanaticism isn't necessarily an answer in my humble opinion.

Broadway Bulldog.

[MyNameInLights]

Posted: 12/28/03 at 10:56pm

Hmmmm, would a gay breakfast be Belgian waffles with a side of soy milk and a pomegranite? Not to mention a sprig of parsley on the side and a Vanity Fair in front of you?

[Auggie27]

Posted: 12/28/03 at 11:21pm

Myname: Or a fritatta. Straight people not only don't eat them, they refuse to say the word out loud.

[MyNameInLights]

Posted: 12/29/03 at 12:27am

Auggie, I'm loving it!

[DofB5]

Posted: 12/29/03 at 5:58pm

I beg pardon but I'm about as straight as they come and I LOVE pomegranites (AKA Indian Apples). I shouldn't eat them any more but I live with the pain and enjoy them while they're available.

D

[MyNameInLights]

Posted: 12/29/03 at 7:44pm

DofB5, I beg your forgiveness. Perhaps I should change pomegranite to kumquat?

[DofB5]

Posted: 12/29/03 at 8:28pm

Forgiven but I like kumquats too--ever had them candied? They're wonderful! I like most fruits except that green melon thing and coconut. The melon thing makes my throat scratchy and coconut chokes me.

You pick away on either of those without a word from me!

D

[Auggie27]

Posted: 12/29/03 at 8:50pm

Come on now, Dofb5, gay men don't choke on anything.

[MyNameInLights]

Posted: 12/29/03 at 9:23pm

An the award for Best Whatever You Want It To Mean sexual inneundo comment goes to Auggie. ::RAH! Bravo!:: LoL