A Forbidden Broadway style spoof of Lestat

[Mattbrain]

Posted: 7/25/06 at 9:36pm

These are lyrics I wrote to the song, I Want More, from the musical, Lestat. If you know the tune, you'll know how these lyrics go. This is kind of like the Forbidden Broadway parodies except the title doesn't rhyme with the original title of the song. The lyrics are somewhat censored:

CLAUDIA
What are you, high on cocaine
Writing a born loser.
You torture us with vampires
We’re not all ignorant boozers

After Dracula and that other show, did you think you had something new
I’ve got news for you, Elton John. Lestat blows too

It’s a dud
It’s a du-u-u-ud

Look at you, you won Best Score
Writing for Aida
Now you praise this crappy show
Like it’s the next Evita

Frank Wildhorn couldn’t pull it off.
Did you think you’d succeed?
The guys who actually like this show
Are clearly smoking weed

It’s a dud
It’s a du-u-u-ud

No more shows where all the actors
Have to put on fake sharp teeth
You must realize the living dead
Never do sell seats

If at some point, the leading man has to suck some blood,
That should be your first clue that it’s a dud

The book is crap, the music sucks,
And Carolee Carmello
Is only in the first act
You’re one crazy fellow
Hugh Panaro
As Lestat, I’m sorry to say, bites
If I want to hear him,
I’ll listen to my bootleg of Music of the Night
The show’s a dud
It’s a du-u-u-ud

Face it, bub, you’re up against
A show with the Four Seasons
And The Drowsy Chaperone
That’s a damn good reason
To close before you lose it all
And I don’t mean the dough
You’ll lose all of your fans
If you don’t close this frickin’ show

It’s a dud
It’s a du-u-u-ud

I’d sooner go to In My Life
Then sit through this piece of doodoo
Or sign up for an extra shift,
At my part time job at Fubu

‘Cause recently I got a call
And when I answered it
My girlfriend said “I’ve got tickets to Lestat”
'Oh S**t'

A du-u-u-u-u-u-ud
It’s a dud
It’s a du-u-u-u-u-ud

No more shows where all the actors
Have to put on fake sharp teeth
You must realize the living dead
Never do sell seats
If, at some point, the leading man has to suck some blood.
That should be your first clue
That it’s a dud

It’s a du-u-u-u-u-u-ud

It’s a dud
It’s a du-u-u-u-u-u-ud

It’s a dud

No, my girlfriend didn't get tickets to Lestat because I don't live in New York or have a girlfriend. And I don't work at Fubu either. I don't work at all. And I'm sad.

[Mattbrain]

Posted: 7/25/06 at 9:38pm

So whaddya think?

[Becoz_i_knew_you21]

Posted: 7/25/06 at 9:40pm

It's good.

[Mattbrain]

Posted: 7/25/06 at 9:43pm

Thanks. I might even write a spoof of Sail Me Away. Here's the chorus.

And I'm starring in a flop
Should have turned it down when they asked
Oh take me away
Take me back to that damn mask.

Updated On: 7/25/06 at 09:43 PM

[LizzieCurry]

Posted: 7/26/06 at 12:54am

Matt brain
Gotta find
The Matt brain
Pacific Coast Highway...

[Mattbrain]

Posted: 7/26/06 at 7:22am

Ah, yes, a parody of Right Brain from the original production of Rent. Did you intend to diss me in some way?

[Fiction Writer]

Posted: 7/26/06 at 7:33am

Probably.

[LizzieCurry]

Posted: 7/26/06 at 2:24pm

Surprisingly (I suppose), nope! I didn't!

[jimnysf]

Posted: 7/26/06 at 2:31pm

Wasn't "Lestat" already a spoof?

[Theatreboy49]

Posted: 7/26/06 at 3:10pm

I absoutly loved Lestat and infact I was watching my bootleg last night but I must say I did enjoy those lyrics.

[JudasIscariot]

Posted: 7/26/06 at 3:11pm

You have a bootleg? I'm telling on you.

[EponineThenardier]

Posted: 7/26/06 at 4:11pm

I like how you brought up how the actor wore fake teeth...twice, even though the actors WEREN'T.


And it's amazing how well you know the tune of the song, since you obviously hate the show so much.

[matt schneider]

Posted: 7/26/06 at 5:29pm

I didn't hate what I've heard of Lestat, but that was hilarious.

Posted: 7/26/06 at 5:31pm

I have to say thats sooo true

but i actually liked that song! Alison Fischer sang that really well and its the ONLY thing i remember from the show. I guess that was a good song choice on your part, lol

[Mattbrain]

Posted: 7/27/06 at 10:05am

Actually, I think the music of Lestat is pretty good. It's catchy. I've seen bootlegs and stuff. I have to say that the book is extremely inconsistent. The first act seems to be devoted primarily to the backstory of Lestat and then in the second act we're watching a condensed version of Interview With the Vampire. Then after Louis leaves, it's back to Lestat. It's like a badly written version of Wicked only with vampires.

[Robos89]

Posted: 8/2/06 at 1:11pm

I liked LESTAT...and that was pretty funny...hahahaha

[WickedGeek28]

Posted: 8/15/06 at 10:00pm

That was quite creative.

[craftymarley]

Posted: 8/16/06 at 2:17am

You have an extra verse in the beginning. Also, paradies are generally funnier if you can get the amount of syllables in each line closer to the original song. And I would have gone with "it's a bore" if I were you. But you're off to a good start.

[Mattbrain]

Posted: 8/28/06 at 11:04am

Thanks.

For nothin'!

[All_For_Laura]

Posted: 8/28/06 at 2:21pm

Hate to be critical, but...

That Sucked.