Alright, this isn't a Brantley Barb, it's from Rob Harvilla talking about Lestat and it made me laugh very hard:
"Have fun dreaming up your own comparisons, because nothing resembling a dramatic spark (or melody) surfaces in the first two hours of this hootenanny. It's like watching Fabio do overwrought interpretive dances to Fiery Furnaces records."
Nothing precious, plain to see, don't make a fuss over me. Not loud, not soft, but somewhere inbetween. Say sorry, just let it be the word you mean.