Completely wrong songs... — Page 2

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#26

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 8:24pm

Annie Sullivan grabs young Helen Keller by the arm and drags her into the yard. Annie forces Helen to kneel in front of the pump with her hands extended under the spout. Annie begins pumping. The water splashes over the young girl's hands. Helen's lips tremble trying to form her first word:

Words can't bring me down
I am beautiful in every single way
Yes, words can't bring me down
So don't you bring me down today

If anyone ever tells you that you put too much Parmesan cheese on your pasta, stop talking to them. You don't need that kind of negativity in your life.

#27

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 8:30pm

The chorus line has just witnessed one of the dancers getting hurt. Zach steps forward and asks them what they are going to do when they can no longer dance. The orchestra begins to play and Morales sings:

It's an art,
It's an art,
To be a fine waitress

If anyone ever tells you that you put too much Parmesan cheese on your pasta, stop talking to them. You don't need that kind of negativity in your life.

#28

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 8:32pm

In PHANTOM OF THE OPERA, as Christine reaches with a shaking hand towards the Phantom, she tears away his mask and then starts to say:

U-G-L-Y
You ain't got no alibi
You UGLY
Yeah, Yeah
You UGLY!!

"They're eating her and then they're going to eat me. OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!!!!" -Troll 2

#29

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 8:38pm

And I think we have a winner.

"Noah, someday we'll talk again. But there's things we'll never say. That sorrow deep inside you. It inside me, too. And it never go away. You be okay. You'll learn how to lose things..."

#30

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 9:15pm

Just after Louise tells Rose to get a life of her own, she turns to her Mama and belts
"Cuz it's too late, baby, now it's too late, though we really did try to make it. Something inside has died and I can't hide it I just can't fake it. No NO NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

#31

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 9:23pm

Craig, very funny!!!!!!!!!!

"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by moments that take our breath away." "Life isn't about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain."

#32

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 10:31pm

Directly after Maria meets the von Trapp children, captain breaks into...

"Everybody ought to have a maid
a working girl
a lurking girl
..."

or a Gypsy Rose Lee finally notices that she's pretty in the dressing room she breaks into, not MOMMA IM A PRETTY GIRL, but...
Lovely! All I AM IS LOVELY!...

(Yes im in a forum mood, i dont know why)

Rosencrantz: "Be happy - if you're not even HAPPY what's so good about surviving? We'll be all right. I suppose we just go on." - from Tom Stoppard's Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead

#33

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 10:51pm

"May the Schwartz be with you!" - Yogurt

#34

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 11:28pm

DOTV
[sigh]
guttertanzer, thank you

#35

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 11:31pm

Sarah sits up in the room alone besides her baby. Coalhouse has left her and she looks at the baby with a look of sadness and sings

Nobody does it better
Makes me feel sad for the rest
Nobody does it half as good as you
Baby, you're the best

BSoBW2: I punched Sondheim in the face after I saw Wicked and said, "Why couldn't you write like that!?"

#36

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/7/04 at 2:13am

After Sarah is taken away to Count VonKrolock's castle, she awakes in the middle of the night and sings a song of passion and fear:

"Once upon a time I was falling in love, but now there's only love in the dark. There's nothing I can do, a TOTAL ECLIPSE OF THE HEART"

oh wait...

Ooooh..... so you wanna insult Jimmy? I'll give you a piece of my mind!!! HE IS A LEGEND, SO NYEEEEEEEEEEEEEHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Who can explain it, who can tell you why? Fools give you reasons, wise men never try -South Pacific

#37

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/7/04 at 2:45am

In Wicked:
Fiyero has just left Glinda for Elphie, Elphie instead of singing I'm not that girl...

(s)he ****ing hates me by Puddle of Mudd

Nessa is bitching about not being able to walk to Elphie and bursts into

I Wanna Dance With Somebody

In AIDA:

Ameris has just found out about Aida and Ramades...

Feeeeeeelings, woah woah woah feeeeeelings, tryin' to forget my feelings of loooove...

SO MANY of these had me laughing.

Idina: Somehow I got myself to the stage, came out at the end of the show, and I had some kind of closure.
Some guy: You looked great!
Idina: Thanks...I WAS SO HIGH! 8/21/05

#38

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/7/04 at 1:30pm

After the German chorus sings and dances their introduction, the stage opens to reveal Hitler poised and ready to sing:

"I am Rosemarie's granddaughter,
The spitting image of my father,
and when the day is done my mom is still my biggest fan!"

(That is probably the singularly most annoying song ever written.)

Neither a borrower nor a lender be...unless that's mine in the first place.

#39

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/7/04 at 2:06pm

Fosca pleads with Giorgio to stay with her, but he insists he can't. Finally, in a moment of sheer desperation to convince him he MUST remain, she suddenly dances away from him and sings:

I'm too sexy for my body
Too sexy for my body...

"That duck was a sexual toy, and it was on display!" -- an unknown Nashville town leader

#40

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/7/04 at 3:22pm

tug boat. nuff said.

The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity -- Harlan Ellison.

#41

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/7/04 at 3:25pm

Please don't ever mention that show, Jack. I'm convinced when I die, God will send me back to earth for 2 1/2 hours to give me my time back for having sat through that.

"Noah, someday we'll talk again. But there's things we'll never say. That sorrow deep inside you. It inside me, too. And it never go away. You be okay. You'll learn how to lose things..."

#42

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/7/04 at 3:28pm

Okay, I'll bite. What in the name of Thespis was Tug Boat?

"That duck was a sexual toy, and it was on display!" -- an unknown Nashville town leader

#43

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/7/04 at 3:30pm

THOU SHALT NOT ever mention this show

"Noah, someday we'll talk again. But there's things we'll never say. That sorrow deep inside you. It inside me, too. And it never go away. You be okay. You'll learn how to lose things..."

#44

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/7/04 at 3:32pm

Oh dear. That bad? Yikes.

"That duck was a sexual toy, and it was on display!" -- an unknown Nashville town leader

#45

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/7/04 at 3:39pm

Let's just say that when I got rush seats 30 minutes before curtain on Saturday night, I was seated 2nd row center orch

"Noah, someday we'll talk again. But there's things we'll never say. That sorrow deep inside you. It inside me, too. And it never go away. You be okay. You'll learn how to lose things..."

#46

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/7/04 at 10:00pm

Caroline Thibodeaux, exhausted and destroyed waits for the bus to go to church. The moon is still out behind her as she approaches center stage and begins to sing.

It's Close To Midnight
And Something Evil's Lurking In The Dark
Under The Moonlight
You See A Sight That Almost Stops Your Heart
You Try To Scream
But Terror Takes The Sound Before You Make It
You Start To Freeze
As Horror Looks You Right Between The Eyes,
You're Paralyzed

'Cause This Is Thriller, Thriller Night
And No One's Gonna Save You From The Beast About Strike
You Know It's Thriller, Thriller Night
You're Fighting For Your Life Inside A Killer, Thriller
Tonight

"Noah, someday we'll talk again. But there's things we'll never say. That sorrow deep inside you. It inside me, too. And it never go away. You be okay. You'll learn how to lose things..."

#47

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/7/04 at 10:08pm

unbeknownest to Rauol and Christine, who are passionately declaring their love for one another, the Phantom lurks over head

Every breath you take
Every move you make
Every bond you break
Every step you take

I'll be watching you

#48

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/7/04 at 10:22pm

Omigod, these last two are hysterical.

"That duck was a sexual toy, and it was on display!" -- an unknown Nashville town leader

#49

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/7/04 at 11:06pm

Rose is over wrought that her daughters have left her and she has nothing. She feverishly screams "Rose's Turn". At the end, Louise enters applauding. It pushes Rose over the edge and she turns to Louise to sing the coda to "Rose's Turn"

I'm a bitch, I'm a bitch
Oh the bitch is back
Stone cold sober as a matter of fact
I can bitch, I can bitch
`Cause I'm better than you
It's the way that I move
The things that I do

If anyone ever tells you that you put too much Parmesan cheese on your pasta, stop talking to them. You don't need that kind of negativity in your life.

#50

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/7/04 at 11:18pm

Carol Channing walks onstage and instead of belting Lorelei Lee's traditional "Diamonds are a Girl's Best Friends" she opts instead for updating her act with some tips she learned from LL Cool J backstage in the Radio City Music Hall Greenroom:
"Don't be fooled by the rocks that I got. I'm still, I'm still Jenny from the block"

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