Completely wrong songs...

#1

Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 12:19pm

So. Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to take any musical, past or present (future musicals are not allowed), and find a moment where one of the leads is supposed to sing something and instead opens his/her mouth with a completely wrong song.

For example:

Sweeney has just dispatched the judge. His moment of triumph complete, he closes the razor, looks at the audience, and sings:

Regrets. I've had a few.
But then again, too few to mention...

The new song can be from any genre: show tune, rock, opera, country western, whatever will most decidedly NOT work in the moment of the show.

Given the almost boundless amount of arcane knowledge on this board, this should be fun.

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"That duck was a sexual toy, and it was on display!" -- an unknown Nashville town leader

#2

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 12:33pm

An tired Jean Valjean slumps in his chair. Fantine and Eponine lay their hands on his shoulder... Lights up behind the scrim, showing us an angelic chorus of their fallen brethren...

"There's a party going on right here, a celebration to last throughout the years. So bring your good times and your laughter too. Celebrate good times, come on! Celebrate good times, come on!"
:: Kool & The Gang

---

Hamlet's father.

Updated On: 7/6/04 at 12:33 PM

#3

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 12:36pm

As Elphaba and Fiyero escape from the Wizard's palace, Fiyero turns to the love of his life and croons:
"Come my lady, come come my lady, you my butterfly, sugar, baby"

Updated On: 7/6/04 at 12:36 PM

#4

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 2:28pm

Instead of "No One Mourns the WICKED" reprise at the end of Act 2, the ensemble decided to liven things up a little by singing
"C'mon everybody c'mon do the conga, we know you can't control yourselves any longer!"

#5

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 3:16pm

The Phantom has brought Christine to his near inaccesible lair. After telling her he's brought her there for a special reason, something that will change both their lives, he leaves her to reflect on her fate and the impossibility of escape, then returns ---

--- in high heels and a wig, belting out "I Enjoy Being a Girl!"

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"That duck was a sexual toy, and it was on display!" -- an unknown Nashville town leader

#6

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 3:26pm

After finally shipping Conrad Birdie off to the military, Albert announces that he is finally going to marry Rosie. The only problem is what to tell his controlling mother, Mae.

Mae is not too happy with the prospect of losing her son to Rosie, and starts singing "...And I am Telling You, I'm Not Going."

Talk about an Oedipal Complex!

#7

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 3:29pm

As Christine and Raoul sail off in the underground boat to start their new life together, the Phantom secretly watches and sings through his tears...

"If you change your mind,
I'm the first in line.
Honey, I'm still free.
Take a chance on me."

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"What can you expect from a bunch of seitan worshippers?" - Reginald Tresilian

#8

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 4:13pm

As Marie Christine ascends the stairs to her certain death, she turns to the audience, grins broadly and belts:

'I'm goin' back
Where I can be me...'

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"I'm so looking forward to a time when all the Reagan Democrats are dead."

#9

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 5:11pm

The beast, hunting around the woods to find Belle stumbles across her amongst the wolves and breaks into

"Who let the dogs out............."

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"A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men" - Willy Wonka

#10

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 5:44pm

Leo Frank is on trial for the possible murder of a young girl. His wife has pleaded with the governor for justice in the case. Before the jury is allowed to read the verdict, the judge asks Leo if he has any final words in his defense.

Leo: Thank heaven, for little girls, for little girls get bigger every day. Thank heaven, for little girls, they grow up in the most delightful way.

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If anyone ever tells you that you put too much Parmesan cheese on your pasta, stop talking to them. You don't need that kind of negativity in your life.

Updated On: 7/6/04 at 05:44 PM

#11

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 5:48pm

During the dramatic fight scene in WSS, the sharks and jets break out into "Next to lovin' I like fightin' best"

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"A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men" - Willy Wonka

#12

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 5:51pm

As the Titanic sinks, Isidor turns to Ida and sings:

'Love, exciting and new.
Come aboard. We're expecting you...'

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"I'm so looking forward to a time when all the Reagan Democrats are dead."

Updated On: 7/6/04 at 05:51 PM

#13

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 5:58pm

Tevye's young daughters are all gathered together awaiting the beginning of their Sabbath Prayer. Hodel turns to Yente, who is joining them, and sings: "My father's a homo, my mother's not thrilled at all. Father homo, what about chromosomes?"

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If anyone ever tells you that you put too much Parmesan cheese on your pasta, stop talking to them. You don't need that kind of negativity in your life.

#14

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 6:12pm

In pre World War II Germany, young Aryan in Nazi garb stands up, gives the "Heil Hitler" salute and sings:

"Black boys are nutritious,
Black boys fill me up,
Black boys are so damned yummy,
They satisfy my tummy..."

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Praying Decca Broadway will put "Don't Bother Me, I Can't Cope" on CD!

Updated On: 7/6/04 at 06:12 PM

#15

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 6:15pm

The lights fade and Sally Bowels, staggers on stage alone. She approaches the microphone and beings to sing.

Workin' 9 to 5
What a way to make a livin'
Barely gettin' by
It's all takin'
And no givin'
They just use your mind
And they never give you credit
It's enough to drive you
Crazy if you let it...

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"Noah, someday we'll talk again. But there's things we'll never say. That sorrow deep inside you. It inside me, too. And it never go away. You be okay. You'll learn how to lose things..."

#16

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 6:37pm

Arthur meets Guenevere just before the final battle with Mordred. Her eyes misted, she tells him that she hopes to find forgiveness in his eyes someday. He responds:

Midnight, gettin' uptight - Where are you?
You said you'd meet me, now it's quarter to two
I know I'm hangin' but I'm still wantin' you
Hey, Jack - It's a fact they're talkin' in town
I turn my back and you're messin' around
I'm not really jealous, don't like lookin' like a clown
I think of you ev'ry night and day
You took my heart, then you took my pride away
I hate myself for loving you

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"That duck was a sexual toy, and it was on display!" -- an unknown Nashville town leader

#17

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 6:47pm

Chicago.
Amos Hart has just discovered that Roxie's baby cannot possibly be his.
He's suddenly left alone on stage, under the spotlight.
He sings:

"I'm on an emotional rollercoaster
Lovin' you ain't nothin' healthy
Lovin' you was never good for me
But I can't get off
this emotional rollercoaster..."

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I starred in a short film called Magnetic Personality. Check it out!

#18

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 6:50pm

Guido, with gun in hand agonizes over his life and then sings..

A little bit of Monica in my life
A little bit of Erica by my side
A little bit of Rita is all i need
A little bit of Tina is what I see
A little bit of Sandra in the sun
A little bit of Mary all night long
A little bit of Jessica here i am
A little bit of you makes me your man

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"A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men" - Willy Wonka

#19

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 7:22pm

Hugh, after reading the reviews about the Peter musical --

"On my own..."


Sorry, not according to the rules of the mission - but couldn't help it

Updated On: 7/6/04 at 07:22 PM

#20

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 7:23pm

After Tony is shot the united gangs turn to Maria and sing:

"Shot through the heart
and you're to blame
You give love a bad name ..."

#21

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 7:27pm

At the conclusion of Anna Karenina, she breaks into

"Clang, clang, clang went the trolley,
Ding, ding, ding went the bell,
Zing, zing, zing went my heartstrings,
From the moment I saw him I fell."

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"A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men" - Willy Wonka

#22

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 7:30pm

fantine drags herself back onstage after selling her body to a sailor, looking shammed and tired. she pauses, then suddenly smiles, looks at the audience and sings:

"my milkshake brings all the boys to the yard!"

#23

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 7:34pm

Mary Lennox goes to Uncle Archibald to talk about the garden and breaks into:

If there's something strange
In your neighbourhood
Who're you going to call? Ghostbusters!

If there's something weird
And it don't look good
Who're you going to call? Ghostbusters!

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"A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men" - Willy Wonka

#24

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 7:34pm

LOL nystateomind04 that is GREAT!!!

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::bust a move::

#25

re: Completely wrong songs...

Posted: 7/6/04 at 7:35pm

As Mimi is on the floor looking for her stash, and Roger happens to be looking at her ass, he starts to sing:

"I like big butts and I cannot lie..."

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I have my books and my poetry to protect me...