I have no idea what your point is about Lincoln and colon cancer.
But from the beginning of the AIDS crisis, there have been attempts to marginalize the HIV community by saying that anyone who lent support to people with HIV, HIV fundraising or HIV research had to have HIV. That marginalization was fueled by AIDS-phobia and its goal was successful for most of the 1980s.
People like Ben Kaye's friend who continues to insist on HIV being the cause of death of someone as famous for his support of people with HIV--even after she is informed otherwise--is clearly displaying obstinacy, idiocy or HIV-phobia. Take your pick.
The college musical-theater professor, if indeed that story is true, is woefully ill-informed.