When Cameron and Mitchell finally do kiss on TV, we have to be sure it is an acceptable kiss. Everyone, please make a checklist of the following so we can organize our dissatisfactions and streamline our complaints in advance:
Emotional intent
Level of affection
Romantic quality
Time length
Explicit/Implied use of tongue
Facial expressions
Pre-Kiss Dialogue
Post-kiss dialogue
Number of extraneous witnesses to kiss (include extras separately)
Direct reaction to kiss (all cast and/or extras)
Implied reaction to kiss (all cast and/or extras)
Audience reaction to kiss (include friends/family and count self as two if watching alone)
Setting
Weather
Approximate time of day
And don't forget, if any of the above is ambiguous or absent, then err on the side of homophobia.
"What can you expect from a bunch of seitan worshippers?" - Reginald Tresilian