ABC's THE RIVER

#1

ABC's THE RIVER

Posted: 2/7/12 at 10:06pm

The other heavily-hyped TV premiere this week with Spielberg's name behind it.

Watching it now...holy yeesh does this ever suck.

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"Impossible is just a big word thrown around by small men who find it easier to live in the world they've been given than to explore the power they have to change it. Impossible is not a fact. It's an opinion. Impossible is not a declaration. It's a dare. Impossible is potential. Impossible is temporary. Impossible is nothing.” ~ Muhammad Ali

#2

ABC's THE RIVER

Posted: 2/7/12 at 10:22pm

oy I'm dvring it to watch later. Should I bother?

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<-----I'M TOTES ROLLING MY EYES

#3

ABC's THE RIVER

Posted: 2/7/12 at 10:29pm

Gosh, this is awful.

Aside from having every horror movie cliche imaginable, there are characters with completely obvious "secrets", and writing that's laughably bad.

It's desperately trying to be the new Lost, but it's failing miserably.

#4

ABC's THE RIVER

Posted: 2/7/12 at 11:11pm

yeah, I'm ten minutes in and it sucks.

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<-----I'M TOTES ROLLING MY EYES

#5

ABC's THE RIVER

Posted: 2/8/12 at 2:08am

why does everyone's response to tv shows now have to be "it's trying to be the new Lost"... sheesh...

#6

ABC's THE RIVER

Posted: 2/8/12 at 3:00am

Meh I thought it was ok-- I suppose I could stick with it for the six more episodes planned for this year. Nice to see Joe Anderson.

#7

ABC's THE RIVER

Posted: 2/8/12 at 6:06am

why does everyone's response to tv shows now have to be "it's trying to be the new Lost"... sheesh...

With this show, it's painfully obvious. Jungle setting, flashbacks, a creepy, unknown, being that kills people, and now they're conveniently marooned.

#8

ABC's THE RIVER

Posted: 2/8/12 at 8:05am

I didn't think it was that bad. I'll give it another couple weeks.

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KFTC!!!!!

#9

ABC's THE RIVER

Posted: 2/8/12 at 9:14am

I enjoyed it

#10

ABC's THE RIVER

Posted: 2/8/12 at 10:29am

Not sure what other shows people have been comparing to "Lost," but what I saw was pretty much just a sh*tty version of "Lost."

I made it through about 20 minutes and then tried to tune it out, as the bf kept watching.

I kept hearing those awful lines tumble out of the characters' mouths and THUNK to the floor. I honestly can't recall when I've heard worse dialog.

I have to say though that, while admitting it was clunky, the bf liked it. So, to each his own.

Updated On: 2/8/12 at 10:29 AM

#11

ABC's THE RIVER

Posted: 2/8/12 at 10:52am

I lost LOST about sometime through the second season, but comparing the two shows what an art form it is to make a spooky TV show with strong storytelling.

Watching this rather unappealing cast spout that dialogue (which ranges from "I'm not a kid anymore!" to "What do you want from us??!!") was painful. They all seemed, well, lost.

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"Impossible is just a big word thrown around by small men who find it easier to live in the world they've been given than to explore the power they have to change it. Impossible is not a fact. It's an opinion. Impossible is not a declaration. It's a dare. Impossible is potential. Impossible is temporary. Impossible is nothing.” ~ Muhammad Ali

#12

ABC's THE RIVER

Posted: 2/8/12 at 10:55am

Besides the tacky dialogue and story line, the jumpy camera work that they're using is irritating to me. I thought they were trying to be a little too much Blair Witch.

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<-----I'M TOTES ROLLING MY EYES

#13

ABC's THE RIVER

Posted: 2/8/12 at 11:38am

Once Upon a Time... the new LOST
Fringe... the new LOST
Alcatraz... the new LOST
Flash Forward... thew new LOST
The Event... the new LOST
Person of Interest... the new LOST
Heroes... the new LOST

#14

ABC's THE RIVER

Posted: 2/8/12 at 11:43am

Okay.

#15

ABC's THE RIVER

Posted: 2/8/12 at 11:50am

"Smash" is TOTALLY the new "Lost."

#16

ABC's THE RIVER

Posted: 2/8/12 at 11:52am

After a few weeks, I found Once Upon a Time to be the new Sominex.

#17

ABC's THE RIVER

Posted: 2/8/12 at 12:39pm

haha, me too!

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<-----I'M TOTES ROLLING MY EYES

#18

ABC's THE RIVER

Posted: 2/9/12 at 4:21am

To be (kinda) fair, the shaky "home movie" video work is a staple of the producers who did the Paranormal Activity movie (at least the first). I honestly didn't see so much Lost (and I didn't think Lost tried hard to be particularly spooky--just a bit mysterious--in its early episodes anyway), but I guess it is kinda a mix of the two (and of course Paranormal Activity goes back to Blair Witch). I think it also suffers somewhat from trying to be a full on horror show but on network tv.

#19

ABC's THE RIVER

Posted: 2/11/12 at 7:13am

This show sucks, it's boring and the cast is terrible. It won't last very long.

#20

ABC's THE RIVER

Posted: 2/13/12 at 8:40pm

I've enjoyed it so far. There. I said it. I understand all the criticism and will admit that much of it is justified, but still, I'm ready for episode 3.

It probably helps that I never watched Lost.

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Sueleen Gay: "Here you go, Bitch, now go make some fukcing lemonade." 10/28/10

#21

ABC's THE RIVER

Posted: 2/14/12 at 3:23pm

Fringe... the new LOST

Fringe?!?! I never heard that comparison. It's basically the new X-Files, but nothing like Lost.

After a few weeks, I found Once Upon a Time to be the new Sominex.

Oh, thank God. I thought it was just me.

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"What can you expect from a bunch of seitan worshippers?" - Reginald Tresilian

#22

ABC's THE RIVER

Posted: 2/14/12 at 5:35pm

I think The Lost comparison is very short sighted. If you watched episode 2, all those "OMG smoke monster" comparisons don't apply anymore. If anything, The River is an anthology horror series disguised as a narrative show. The first episode was the baby monster. The second episode was haunted dolls. It feels like the characters are going to stumble across a new horror every week as they journey further and further to find the missing people from the abandoned boat.