Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea.

#1

Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea.

Posted: 9/6/09 at 12:41pm

How funny is Handler's 2nd book!!!

I found it a lot funnier than her "Horizontal Life" book.

It was great, any lines you guys enjoyed?

I think one of the funniest was when she thought her maid's name was Fantasia instead of Florencia for 2 yrs. And also when Fantasia stole and returned her TIVO.

---

"People have their opinions and that doesn't mean that their opinions are wrong or right. I just take it with a grain of salt because opinions are like as*holes, everyone has one". -Felicia Finley-

#2

re: Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea.

Posted: 9/6/09 at 12:50pm

Her dad telling the flight attendant that he is on his honeymoon with Chelsea was funny too!

---

"People have their opinions and that doesn't mean that their opinions are wrong or right. I just take it with a grain of salt because opinions are like as*holes, everyone has one". -Felicia Finley-

#3

re: Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea.

Posted: 9/6/09 at 3:18pm

I suggest getting the audio book, MUCH funnier with her reading it.

#4

re: Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea.

Posted: 9/6/09 at 4:06pm

I SO need to get this book...

---

"This show had the WORST magnets on Broadway!"

#5

re: Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea.

Posted: 9/6/09 at 4:24pm

It was 17 dollars at the store...

Where can you get the audio and how much is it?

---

"People have their opinions and that doesn't mean that their opinions are wrong or right. I just take it with a grain of salt because opinions are like as*holes, everyone has one". -Felicia Finley-

#6

re: Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea.

Posted: 9/6/09 at 4:37pm

She really is a teriffic writer. I never remember specific lines, but I remember laughing out loud while reading both her books.

#7

re: Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea.

Posted: 9/6/09 at 5:42pm

There are places to get it online or so I have heard, but they aren't exactly legit. I would never condone such use, but if you would, pm me for the link. I mean, not that I have it or anything... You need BitTorrent for it to work. Again, not that I do or would.

---

Pretty pretty please don't you ever ever feel like you're less than f**ckin' perfect!

#8

re: Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea.

Posted: 9/6/09 at 6:58pm

I read this book in one night. So hysterical.

---

A little swash, a bit of buckle - you'll love it more than bread.

#9

re: Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea.

Posted: 9/6/09 at 7:45pm

I have it not on Bit Torrent if you want it. PM me.

#10

re: Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea.

Posted: 9/6/09 at 7:54pm

Her random tangents were great. I love when she was talking about adopting a child by sponsoring them and how the strains of being a mother were enough reason to go on a vacation. I think I laughed the most at that point. What a great book!

---

::bust a move::

#11

re: Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea.

Posted: 9/6/09 at 8:56pm

I read two of the chapters to my campers (13-year-olds) this summer, and though many of the jokes went over their heads, it was still a hilarious time.

---

I'm as jumpy as a virgin at a prison rodeo!

#12

re: Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea.

Posted: 9/7/09 at 12:00am

The audiobook is a scream with all of Chelsea's inflections and exasperation. You can get it from the library and save yourself some $$. I love the opening story about her "relationship" as a child with Goldie Hawn. I wont say more than that so as not to spoil it. It made me crack up.

---

"The sexual energy between the mother and son really concerns me!"-random woman behind me at Next to Normal "I want to meet him after and bang him!"-random woman who exposed her breasts at Rock of Ages, referring to James Carpinello

#13

re: Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea.

Posted: 9/7/09 at 12:19am

I love the story about her first(& last) DUI.

What I don't like about the Horizontal Life audiobook is that it's not read by Chelsea.

For those interested Chelsea 3rd (& last for awhile) book (Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang) will be available March 9th 2010.

#14

re: Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea.

Posted: 9/7/09 at 1:31am

I keep forgetting to look for this book everytime I go to Barnes and Noble!

I'll definitely be reading it soon, though.

#15

re: Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea.

Posted: 9/7/09 at 2:02pm

I especially loved the "massage parlor" bit. "No sucky sucky here!"

Has she ever given an indication as to how much of her books are true to life?

---

Let me watch your toes and fingers twitch.

#16

re: Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea.

Posted: 9/7/09 at 5:04pm

That massage parlor was too funny, she is truly a "hot mess", I bet it was 100% all true.
I remember I wasn't sure if Kathy Griffin's standup stories were true back in the early 2000's, but then she came up with her reality show, so the question was answered then and there.

---

"People have their opinions and that doesn't mean that their opinions are wrong or right. I just take it with a grain of salt because opinions are like as*holes, everyone has one". -Felicia Finley-

#17

re: Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea.

Posted: 9/8/09 at 10:09am

I thought her first book stunk with only a few funny moments, so have not been interested in picking this one up.

I do like her talk show and her stand up I've seen on youtube is funny.

---

"Carson has combined his passion for helping children with his love for one of Cincinnati's favorite past times - cornhole - to create a unique and exciting event perfect for a corporate outing, entertaining clients or family fun."

"In Oz, the verb is douchifizzation." PRS