Being Gay

Homophobic conservative parents often can be both things when the target is some distant bogeyman they don't have any interaction with... and when faced with info that forces them to challenge their beliefs, most typically come around. Sadly not all but a seeming majority do... or you may get a pass, but not those "other gays," etc. In any event, it's always the right decision to live your best life.

Congratulations on this huge step of self-acceptance. It took me a while to get there, as I am a fairly religious person from a fairly religious background, with old-fashioned parents. When I told my mom, she already knew and was accepting, even if she says inappropriate things from time-to-time. I have actually never come out to my dad (we have a very complicated relationship, and he's a complicated person), but he did go to his cousin's same-sex wedding last year, even when he openly opposes same-sex marriage. You don't have to come out until you're ready. You've got this! :)

Surround yourself with love, so when you hit bumps in the road you have people there to steady you. Take things at YOUR pace...however slow or fast that may be. And remember, you may need to give them time, but I hope you are greeted with hugs.

When you can't find comfort in people, read! Watch movies or TV with LGBT characters. Reading helped me realize a lot about myself and comforted me when I wasn't very comfortable with myself. Seeing yourself represented in a positive light can make all the difference.

I wasn't the biggest fan of THE VELVET RAGE, but I'd still recommend it. The book may not fit every gay male like a glove, but you are bound to find something that speaks to you.

I never officially came out to my parents, but they knew. My Mother attended ny Life Partner's (it was 93' funeral after he passed from AIDS at 34. She pulled me aside at the funeral and said, "There is nothing to say or worry about. I have know for a long while. I cannot imagine what it is like to lose a partner!". My Dad lambasted me for not telling him of Kevin's illness. "I liked the kid! Oh, and by the way, I knew about you!". You might find yourself surprised. Congrats though, you took the first big brave step. As you get older you will realize it becomes more and more less important.