Bring Me the Head of Oprah Winfrey

[Borstalboy]

Posted: 5/6/04 at 11:39am

Well, one thing you can say about freak-show reactionaries, they are hella united. It seems Oprah did a segment on teen sex, and said a few things that were "graphic". The FCC was immediately flooded with thousands of letters demanding Oprah be fined for indecency. They can go after Howard Stern, no problem...but will America freak out when they go after Saint Oprah?
Here are some of the outraged (and outrageously funny) letters:


Letters to the FCC

[Zola Q. LaPlaya]

Posted: 5/6/04 at 11:44am

Borstalboy: you made my morning.

Does anyone have a tape of the show? I would like to know more about that rainbow effect during fellatio.

[JohnPopa]

Posted: 5/6/04 at 11:46am

If they don't go after her Howard will have a field day trying to bring her and them down.

[orion59]

Posted: 5/6/04 at 11:47am

God, some of those letters are funny. Some of them must be jokes though, especailly the ones that for no apparent reason, menation that their twins were coming home from bible day camp or that their twins we about to watch the Daddy Day Care dvd. They 're trying to hard to emphasize their wholesomeness. And why the hell are all twins?

[Zola Q. LaPlaya]

Posted: 5/6/04 at 11:51am

Them's a fertile people.

[SueleenGay]

Posted: 5/6/04 at 11:54am

I have a feeling that Stern's supporters got wind of this and did a mass mailing. I am sure some are jokes, but the reality of the situation is not too funny.

[orion59]

Posted: 5/6/04 at 11:56am

Yeah I guess they are fertile and, judging from the letters, they do not engage in anything other than staright forward missionary style sex. I find it interesting that in spite of a number of topics havinfg been graphically discussed, most of the letters focus the outrage over tossed salad. Maybe it hits too close to home with tehir own fanatsies.

Updated On: 5/6/04 at 11:56 AM

[Zola Q. LaPlaya]

Posted: 5/6/04 at 11:58am

Ok, I gotta admit, I have no idea what "tossed salad" refers to. I have done just about everything (along with some of you) but this is a mystery to me.

[orion59]

Posted: 5/6/04 at 12:03pm

I won't go so far as to explain it here but, if you read the letters in The Smoking Gun item, it's explained. I actually ahve never heard that term before so I found out after reading a few letters...I've always known it by another term

[SueleenGay]

Posted: 5/6/04 at 12:04pm

Cleaning the Kitchen?

[Zola Q. LaPlaya]

Posted: 5/6/04 at 12:06pm

Nope -- never did that one. No wonder I didn't recognize the term.

[orion59]

Posted: 5/6/04 at 12:06pm

Never heard that one either. This board is so educational. I always learn something new.

[joeyjoe]

Posted: 5/6/04 at 12:14pm

someone's child's head actually exploded at the mention of "tossing salad" ... too funny!

[Zola Q. LaPlaya]

Posted: 5/6/04 at 12:16pm

I think we need to change the subject. I'm trying to be diplomatic to our women and straight men allies on the board. But honestly, if we keep talking about this, I'm have a step away from saying ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.

[orion59]

Posted: 5/6/04 at 12:23pm

Diplomatic to women and straight men? Yeah, like none of them have ever tried it. I've heard stories from straight men.

[robbiej]

Posted: 5/6/04 at 12:30pm

If you think women and straight men do not enjoy a good tossed salad every once in a while, you are SORELY MISTAKEN, ZOLA.

[Zola Q. LaPlaya]

Posted: 5/6/04 at 12:33pm

I know they enjoy it. That's why I didn't want to say: ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. yuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk. blllllllllllech. But you made me do it, didn't you?

[orion59]

Posted: 5/6/04 at 12:34pm

I personally like a good Greek salad myself.

[SonofMammaMiaSam]

Posted: 5/6/04 at 12:38pm

Smothered in French dressing!

[Zola Q. LaPlaya]

Posted: 5/6/04 at 12:38pm

HOLD THE PHONE.

Thanks to my posse on the board, I have been properly educated, and would like to retract my earlier statement. I was under the impression that one secret ingredient is not found anywhere in my house. But I was incorrect.

My new position is that I am very much in favor of tossed salad.

Thanks.

Updated On: 5/6/04 at 12:38 PM

[jrb_actor]

Posted: 5/6/04 at 12:39pm

I could come over and remind you of what it is, Zola...

[SueleenGay]

Posted: 5/6/04 at 12:40pm

Do I hear another rim-shot coming?

[Borstalboy]

Posted: 5/6/04 at 12:40pm

My question is: Why the hell are third graders watching "Oprah" to begin with....what, was "Reading Rainbow" cancelled now they have to learn about....oh, I won't finish that thought.
Seriously, though, when I was a kid my mom would freak out if she caught me watching "Donahue"....what gives?

[orion59]

Posted: 5/6/04 at 12:45pm

Now I want to know what you originally thought it was, Zola.

[redhotinnyc2]

Posted: 5/6/04 at 12:46pm

Zola - now are you SURE that is your new Position???LOL