Can The Adults Please Smoke? 30th Anniversary Special: Thirty, Dirty,Flirty and still FABULOUS! — Page 117

I didn't mean for you to come here for a pleasure trip, Shira. I meant for you to come here, clean my apartment and then fly back Friday night.

Girly, do something nice for yourself after the wake, even if it is as simple as stopping off for a coffee or a drink on your way home.

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Updated On: 11/24/09 at 01:55 PM

I can't wait to see that furry bundle of joy. And his new puppy!

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Good afternoon, my Peeps!

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A man is driving down a deserted stretch of highway when he notices a sign out of the corner of his eye....It reads:

SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS
HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION
10 MILES

He thinks this is a figment of his imagination and drives on without second thought....

Soon he sees another sign which reads:

SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS
HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION
5 MILES

Suddenly he begins to realize that these signs are for real and drives past a third sign saying:

SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS
HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION
NEXT RIGHT

His curiosity gets the best of him and he pulls into the drive. On the far side of the parking lot is a stone building with a small sign next to the door reading:

SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS

He climbs the steps and rings the bell. The door is answered by a nun in a long black habit who asks, 'What may we do for you my son?'

He answers, 'I saw your signs along the highway and was interested in possibly doing business.....'

'Very well my son. Please follow me.' He is led through many winding
passages and is soon quite disoriented. The nun stops at a closed door and tells the man, 'Please knock on this door.'

He does so and another nun in a long habit, holding a tin cup answers the door... This nun instructs, 'Please place $100 in the cup then go through the large wooden door at the end of the hallway.'

He puts $100 in the cup, eagerly trots down the hall and slips through the door pulling it shut behind him.

The door locks, and he finds himself back in the parking lot facing another sign:

GO IN PEACE.
YOU HAVE JUST BEEN SCREWED BY THE SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS.
SERVES YOU RIGHT, YOU SINNER.

I have days...nay, weeks like that Shamey. Good to have here.

I just had the dreamiest, sexiest installer I have ever laid eyes on here to put in the oven. Yum, yum, yum! Good news, the oven will fit. Bad news, the electrical is incompatible and couldn't be wired. Good news, Nick has to come back. Bad news, more $$$$$ and still no working oven. But, Nick has to come back!!! Moist!

My lord...the man's an ex in the making. They come and go so quickly at Chez SOMMS.

Shut up.

Hi Addy! Do you feel any better, having gotten out and about?

A bit. It felt great to take a steamy shower and then get out for some fresh air. I'm about to take another hit of my multi-symptom cold meds and maybe take a nap...

I should know better than to take a vacation day!

I need a new book to curl up with... any suggestions?

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"I'm buying more appliances to be installed as we speak!"

*bites tongue - again*

Oh cuz, there must be a cheaper way to meet gorgeous men.

Addy, I haven't had time to even pick up a book since summer. I'm no help there. But if you take enough cold medicine, it won't matter - you'll be asleep before the end of the first sentence.

I've read all of the Sookie Stackhouse (True Blood) series by Charlaine Harris. Love them! I'm also a huge fan of Lisa Scotoline. All her books have gals as main characters and all take place in Philly! I'm such a girl.

I just finished reading "The Princess Bride" and will now move onto "The Gang - The complete history of Sesame Street" or I think that is what it is called, lol. Then the new Grisham novel that came out this month.

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