Ok, so we have auditions coming up tomorrow and Tuesday to determine who gets to go to competition. Tensions are really high and everyone's being really agressive. One of the audition times for a piece I want was at a time when I have another class. I told my director that I would have to do it at a different time, and I guess I caught her at a bad time because she got angry at me even though I didn't think I had said anything rude.
I just told my parents about it, and they responded by telling me that they've been talking (to each other) about how I've been being a bitch lately and that's why my friends are all angry at me (which I don't think is true...they're angry at me because I'm auditioning for the same piece they are...it's totally normal). I'm already sick today, and I just feel incredibly hurt by them telling me this all of a sudden. And now I feel like maybe they're right and maybe I'm screwing up my chances of getting cast in the spring musical by making my director mad...so now I'm thinking I shouldn't audition for competition at all, even though I've been preparing for months. And if my being aggressive instead of sitting back and letting everyone take all the pieces I want to do from me is the right thing to do, then I just don't know what to do anymore.
"A little humility wouldn't hurt."
--Ellie, Constantine-Hellblazer, "Dangerous Habits"