Cheating because you have no will power?- Page 2

[JasonM12480]

Posted: 10/27/11 at 9:37am

What I don't understand is this: Why enter into a relationship or partnership if you don't have the intention of being faithful to that person you're with?

I am one of those rare people (like Best12Bars) who has a hard time separating love and physical intimacy - I need both to make it work, to keep it up, and to be invested. I don't do hookups, because I know that if the other person doesn't want anything more than a roll in the hay, then for myself, I can't go there because I desire emotional investment from a partner. That's me, and I know not everyone feels the same way. To each, his own.

However, this whole "I cheat because I have no self-control or will power" thing is, in my opinion, a big pile of bull. We are all fully capable of making decisions and choices. If you're not happy in the relationship you're in, then be a man/woman and work on your issues with your partner, either in private or through therapy, or get the hell out. The "open relationship" thing I've never understood - to me, it's a sign of laziness and lack of interest in the other partner. If you need to bring a 3rd person into your relationship, then something IS wrong within the confines of the two parties, plain and simple. It's not working, because you should both be emotionally and physically fulfilled with each other. And if you're not anymore...then end it and move on with your lives.

These are MY opinions - I know they may not work for everyone, nor am I Jesus and am handing out Gospel of dating and relationships. LOL

[SonofRobbieJ]

Posted: 10/27/11 at 11:07am

"it's a sign of laziness and lack of interest in the other partner. If you need to bring a 3rd person into your relationship, then something IS wrong within the confines of the two parties, plain and simple."

HAHAHAHAHA. Plain and simple. When discussing intimate relationships between people. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Here's the thing. Do what you gotta do. Have the relationship YOU want. More power to you. Enjoy. Be happy. But you're judging something you CLEARLY know nothing about. And that's fine...you just look like an ill-informed douchebag.

Make the choices you can live with for yourself. And give the rest of us the same courtesy without the silly disdain.

[Q]

Posted: 10/27/11 at 11:24am

"I am one of those rare people (like Best12Bars) who has a hard time separating love and physical intimacy - I need both to make it work, to keep it up, and to be invested . . . That's me, and I know not everyone feels the same way. To each, his own."

How did you go from seeing how your own feelings create your own choices, acknowledging that not everyone has the same feelings (and hence, different choices,) and actually saying "To each, his own" to the severe judgment of those different choices?

[Mister Matt]

Posted: 10/27/11 at 11:27am

That's me, and I know not everyone feels the same way. To each, his own.

You should have left it at that instead of negating yourself and getting all sanctimonious and telling people how their relationships should be defined based on your own preferences. It's basically the same thing as a heterosexual telling a gay person that homosexuality is a choice.

[SonofMammaMiaSam]

Posted: 10/27/11 at 11:36am

I f*cked your boyfriend last week.

[SonofRobbieJ]

Posted: 10/27/11 at 2:06pm

Just the one time, SOMMS?

I'm slightly disappointed in you.

[JasonM12480]

Posted: 10/27/11 at 4:33pm

Well, color me wrong, then! I'll go put my dunce cap back on now. LOL

[Mister Matt]

Posted: 10/27/11 at 4:38pm

Um, ok. LOL?

[iflitifloat]

Posted: 10/27/11 at 5:29pm

I don't think monogamy is essential to a relationship, but if that relationship began with the agreement of exclusivity, it has to be out on the table if one of the partners wants to change the rules.

If one partner changes the rules without telling the other, that is a betrayal that will eventually erode and possibly destroy the relationship. Once trust is lost, it takes a really, really long time to win it back again.