Favorite Will & Grace Quotes...One Liners.

#1

Favorite Will & Grace Quotes...One Liners.

Posted: 9/23/09 at 8:26am

I don't watch television per se. The only 3 shows I watch on regular network television are: GREY'S ANATOMY, BROTHERS & SISTERS and LOST. I watch everything else via DVD.

I recently revisited WILL & GRACE after a long hiatus. Such a laugh out loud funny show. They had some real zingers.

One of my favorite ones that literally had me in tears was from the episode which featured Michele Lee and Chita Rivera as closeted lesbian lovers.

KAREN: Oh, my G-dash-D. You'll never guess who's here!

JACK: [GASPS] Greg Evigan from TV's "BJ and the Bear," and then, after a brief hiatus, "My Two Dads"?

WILL: You know, I never realized just how gay both those titles are. It's a wonder he didn't go on to star in "Hey, Faggot!"

What are your favorites?

#2

re: Favorite Will & Grace Quotes...One Liners.

Posted: 9/23/09 at 8:29am

My favorite episodes were the Sing-A-Long Sound Of Music, and the one where Jack & Grace go on antiques roadshow.

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"It does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are 20 gods or no god. It neither picks my pocket, nor breaks my leg." -- Thomas Jefferson

#3

re: Favorite Will & Grace Quotes...One Liners.

Posted: 9/23/09 at 8:32am

Karen Walker (of course): Drive a car, drive a boat, drive a plane. What does it matter? As long as I'm drunk!

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Cheyenne Jackson tickled me. AFTER ordering SoMMS a drink but NOT tickling him, and hanging out with Girly in his dressing room (where he DIDN'T tickle her) but BEFORE we got married. To others. And then he tweeted Boobs. He also tweeted he's good friends with some chick on "The Voice" who just happens to be good friends with Tink's ex. And I'm still married. Oh, and this just in: "Pettiness, spite, malice ....Such ugly emotions... So sad." - After Eight, talking about MEEEEEEEE!!! I'm so honored! :-)

#4

re: Favorite Will & Grace Quotes...One Liners.

Posted: 9/23/09 at 8:45am

Karen: Hey, hey, hey. Come on. I know what guilt is. It's one of those touchy-feely words that people throw around that don't really mean anything... You know, like "maternal" or "addiction."

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BroadwayBoobs: I'll give all of you who weren't there a hint of who took the pictures ...it rhymes with shameless

SOMMS: I knew it was Tink!

#5

re: Favorite Will & Grace Quotes...One Liners.

Posted: 9/23/09 at 8:54am

Karen: Honey, you're simple, shallow, and a common whore. That's why we're soulmates.

And this one, although I'm not sure if this is the exact wording:

Karen: You wrote a bad play and you were molested: welcome to the theatre!

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"I am and always will be the optimist. The hoper of far-flung hopes and dreamer of improbable dreams." - Doctor Who

"Yes, the brutalities of progress are called revolutions. When they are over, men recognize that the human race has been harshly treated but it has moved forward." - Les Miserables

#6

re: Favorite Will & Grace Quotes...One Liners.

Posted: 9/23/09 at 8:55am

All of those are great. Keep 'em coming!

#7

re: Favorite Will & Grace Quotes...One Liners.

Posted: 9/23/09 at 9:31am

Karen: Hey, what's going on here? I'm sensing a mood.
Grace: Well, Will thinks that I'm taking advantage of...
Karen: Yeah, save it honey. We'll crack it open later when we're desperate.

#8

re: Favorite Will & Grace Quotes...One Liners.

Posted: 9/23/09 at 10:03am

Cheryl: Mrs. Walker? Cheryl Bricker-Fossberg, Taylor and Hayden's mom.

Karen: I have no idea what you just said.

#9

re: Favorite Will & Grace Quotes...One Liners.

Posted: 9/23/09 at 10:04am

It's great sitting here reading these. So funny.

#10

re: Favorite Will & Grace Quotes...One Liners.

Posted: 9/23/09 at 10:06am

Karen: Oh, honey, you say potato, I say vodka.

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"It does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are 20 gods or no god. It neither picks my pocket, nor breaks my leg." -- Thomas Jefferson

#11

re: Favorite Will & Grace Quotes...One Liners.

Posted: 9/23/09 at 10:56am

Karen: "The Tonys aren't real awards. They just invented them to keep gay men off the street for a night."

Updated On: 9/23/09 at 10:56 AM

#12

re: Favorite Will & Grace Quotes...One Liners.

Posted: 9/23/09 at 11:15am

Beverley Leslie to Karen:

"I thought I smelled gin and regret."

#13

re: Favorite Will & Grace Quotes...One Liners.

Posted: 9/23/09 at 11:26am

Karen to Jack:

Honey, you fell out of the Gay Tree and hit every Gay Branch on the way down...

...and you landed on a gay guy...

...and you did him.

#14

re: Favorite Will & Grace Quotes...One Liners.

Posted: 9/23/09 at 11:28am

BEVERLEY: You know, I had to speak up for you just now. The ladies were saying how sad and pathetic you are being all alone here without Stanley, but I defended you. I said, "She's a hophead, too."

#15

re: Favorite Will & Grace Quotes...One Liners.

Posted: 9/23/09 at 11:35am

Karen: Good Lord. I can't believe I'm at a public pool. Why doesn't somebody just pee directly on me?

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Cheyenne Jackson tickled me. AFTER ordering SoMMS a drink but NOT tickling him, and hanging out with Girly in his dressing room (where he DIDN'T tickle her) but BEFORE we got married. To others. And then he tweeted Boobs. He also tweeted he's good friends with some chick on "The Voice" who just happens to be good friends with Tink's ex. And I'm still married. Oh, and this just in: "Pettiness, spite, malice ....Such ugly emotions... So sad." - After Eight, talking about MEEEEEEEE!!! I'm so honored! :-)

#16

re: Favorite Will & Grace Quotes...One Liners.

Posted: 9/23/09 at 11:40am

Jack: "What kind of father doesn't want a roadside manicure from his own son?"

#17

re: Favorite Will & Grace Quotes...One Liners.

Posted: 9/23/09 at 1:21pm

Jack: Lesson for today: Though the eyes are the window to the soul, the zipper is the window to the underwear.

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BroadwayBoobs: I'll give all of you who weren't there a hint of who took the pictures ...it rhymes with shameless

SOMMS: I knew it was Tink!

#18

re: Favorite Will & Grace Quotes...One Liners.

Posted: 9/23/09 at 1:23pm

Ben Doucette: Let's talk wine. Karen, you have any preference?
Karen: Honey, I'd suck the alcohol out of a deodorant stick, so you're asking the wrong gal.

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BroadwayBoobs: I'll give all of you who weren't there a hint of who took the pictures ...it rhymes with shameless

SOMMS: I knew it was Tink!

#19

re: Favorite Will & Grace Quotes...One Liners.

Posted: 9/23/09 at 1:53pm

JACK: Stop worrying, she's just a maid.

KAREN: Just a maid? [GASPING] That's like saying that Pradas are just shoes, or vodka is just a morning beverage!

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"Why, I make more money than... than... than Calvin Coolidge! PUT TOGETHER!"
~Lina Lamont


My name wasn't, isn't, and will never be Scott.

#20

re: Favorite Will & Grace Quotes...One Liners.

Posted: 9/23/09 at 1:56pm

When playing Celebrity and without missing a beat...

Will: Bangs.

Grace: NANCY MCKEON!!

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"What can you expect from a bunch of seitan worshippers?" - Reginald Tresilian

#21

re: Favorite Will & Grace Quotes...One Liners.

Posted: 9/23/09 at 2:51pm

Karen: Your boyfriend's a big, flaming, feather wearing, man kissing, disco dancing, Vermont living, Christina Aguilera loving, Mykonos going, honey- take it on home.
Jack: Tom's queer, dear.
Karen: Merry Christmas!

And pretty much the entirety of the one where Neil Patrick Harris is the leader of the ex-gays group.

#22

re: Favorite Will & Grace Quotes...One Liners.

Posted: 9/23/09 at 2:55pm

Karen: It's a victimless crime, like tax evasion or public indecency!

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"Why, I make more money than... than... than Calvin Coolidge! PUT TOGETHER!"
~Lina Lamont


My name wasn't, isn't, and will never be Scott.

#23

re: Favorite Will & Grace Quotes...One Liners.

Posted: 9/23/09 at 3:01pm

Jack: "What's that? It's a huff! I think I'll leave in it!" *stomps off*

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Nothing matters but knowing nothing matters. ~ Wicked
Everything in life is only for now. ~ Avenue Q
There is no future, there is no past. I live this moment as my last. ~ Rent

"He's a tramp, but I love him."

#24

re: Favorite Will & Grace Quotes...One Liners.

Posted: 9/23/09 at 3:04pm

Karen: It's the oldest story in the book. Boy meets girl. Boy wants girl to do dominatrix film. Girl says, "Naked?" Boy says, "Yeah." Girl says, "No way." Boy says, "Okay how about you just wear this rubber dress and beat this old guy with a scrub brush?" Girl says, "How hard?"

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"Why, I make more money than... than... than Calvin Coolidge! PUT TOGETHER!"
~Lina Lamont


My name wasn't, isn't, and will never be Scott.

#25

re: Favorite Will & Grace Quotes...One Liners.

Posted: 9/23/09 at 3:24pm

Karen: Love ya like a cold sore!

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"Long live God!" (GODSPELL)