Government to Kill Off Seniors: Immodest Proposal

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 7/29/09 at 9:48pm

When my idol and guru, Congresswoman Virginia "Cross-Eyed & Painless" Fox of my second favorite Carolina condemned the health care reform package's plan to kill off America's seniors, I thought, "Hold the phone, Virginia! I ordinarily agree with what you say but this time I think you're being too hasty. Except for sixth graders who are actually worse, a world without high school seniors would be one step closer to heaven!"

Imagine a world in which there are NO incoming college freshman! The economic stimulus resulting from parents not having to waste their hard-earned dollars on educations that can not even possibly pay for themselves at this point would be astronomical. Closer to home, there would probably be no annoying "Starshines!" thread here on Broadwayworld! Wouldn't THAT be fabulous?

But like all gorgeous utopian visions, this was not meant to be. According to Congresswoman Fox, the government will be killing senior citizens. Besides the fact that that's my dating pool, this just doesn't seem right. I mean, most people's mom-moms and pup-pups are senior citizens and it's just wrong to kill people's mom-moms and pup-pups.

I propose Congresswoman Fox should attempt to change the bill so the government kills the RIGHT seniors. High school seniors.

[Gothampc]

Posted: 7/29/09 at 10:15pm

I propose Congresswoman Fox should attempt to change the bill so the government kills the RIGHT seniors. High school seniors.

But then they would have to shut down IDINA the fan club for those who love Wicked.

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 7/29/09 at 10:23pm

Unfortunately, you have to take the good with the great.

[zoraksferal]

Posted: 7/29/09 at 10:53pm

Love Wicked, loathe Idina. Can we just target her fans to rid the world of "Well, is really good. Second favorite to IDINA!!!! OMG, SHE WAS SO AWESOME!!!!!!!!!" Then we will have world piece... hypothetically.

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 7/30/09 at 8:05am

I think we should go with the modified government plan to kill high school seniors.

[madbrian]

Posted: 7/30/09 at 8:17am

For the record, there's something in the healthcare proposal that encourages (I'm not sure precisely how) living wills. The lunatic fringe of the GOP is spinning that into the Dems promoting the euthenization of seniors.

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 7/30/09 at 8:33am

You can say it's not there but Virginia Fox says it is so I'm going to have to go with a proven entity over your so called quote unquote "opinion" on the matter.

[madbrian]

Posted: 7/30/09 at 8:39am

Warning: it's Virginia Foxx, not Fox. She catches you misspelling her name, she'll cut you.

[Jane2]

Posted: 7/30/09 at 8:41am

Oy, looks like I'm not long for this world.

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 7/30/09 at 8:45am

Jane, I'll be holding a march to get it changed to high school seniors. No worries, as they would say.

[Jane2]

Posted: 7/30/09 at 9:00am

Namo, who would still be able to march in that Senior march?

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 7/30/09 at 9:05am

Everybody concerned about the cause.

I would assume pro-life people would support the government murdering high school seniors when you consider how many abortions the boys cause the girls to need.

[shameless]

Posted: 7/30/09 at 9:28am

I'm sure those unable to walk could use golf carts in the march.

Oh, and leave Idina alone! She's all for killing the senior class of 2010.

[Jane2]

Posted: 7/30/09 at 9:49am

I'm picturing this march looking like the walker scene in The Producers~

[Unknown User]

Posted: 7/30/09 at 9:56am

When I saw her on CNN last night I thought for a moment it was a Daily Show "bit." She actually believes this stuff....

[zoraksferal]

Posted: 7/30/09 at 12:02pm

Namo, stop trying to kill High School Seniors! I am gonna be a senior this year, so that will just suck!

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 7/30/09 at 12:11pm

That does suck. But it's all in the name of meaningful healthcare reform. You understand. Just think big picture.

[zoraksferal]

Posted: 7/30/09 at 1:08pm

Well, if the Messiah says so, I guess I understand!

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 7/30/09 at 10:14pm

Mr Roxy, the original plan could be helpful if things don't work out.