If anyone feels like playing this game...

Some of us are playing it on another site. Type in a few opening sentences for a novel, It can be any genre (bad, romance, gore, etc.) Here are a few of mine so far....

Dahlia was starting to regret putting draino into the cake she just left off at Marsha's house.

As Hortense was just drifting off into lalaland in the OR, she heard her doctor cry out "you gave her THAT???? oh my god!!!"

Bob was deliberating about winning one million dollars if he will eat a half cup of BM.

Being born with 500 IQ might sound great to some people, but for Sluggo it was a burden.

As Frothingham spread out the cardboard box which would serve as his living quarters this night, he sighed and remembered that only a few months ago he owned the building he was using as a headboard.

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Updated On: 2/10/09 at 07:03 PM

I'd read that, ghostlight.

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Very good, Stockard!

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"Why? Why do I even drink red wine? It makes me do the STUPIDEST things!" she thought as she woke with her head pounding....

(Oh wait. That's my life, not a novel)

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hahahahaha!

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I was sleeping, but also alert enough to know that there was someone else in the room. My blanket was covering all of me except for my right shoulder which was exposed, and for some reason, I was scared to death because of it. But I was too scared, or too much asleep to adjust the blanket. I lay there, paralyzed with fear, as I felt the other being coming closer and closer. Sure enough, tap! One brief but sharp tap on my shoulder and it was all over. I was able to cover myself, and the fear was gone, but I knew for sure someone or something tapped me.

p.s. This really happened to me, a few times in my youth.

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The delusional woman wandered through the decaying, neglected old building, telling everyone who would listen that it didn't matter that it was falling down. It wasn't dangerous, it was beautiful. "It's so charming!" she cried, hastily adding, "Decadent also means charming - Fassbinder says so!" seconds before the ceiling collapsed, killing everyone who had stayed to listen to her.

The doorbell rang. "Is that the plumber?" C****nay, I mean Chablis wondered as she was slipping into her maribou feathered Candies...

[Chicka-bow-wow!]

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Updated On: 2/11/09 at 09:52 AM

I guess that I have to rename my heroine...it seems that that white wine has a cuss word in it!

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I usually do a h*rD*n on purpose...

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Call me Ishmael, as I will buy the flowers myself in this epoch of belief and incredulity, though you'd probably rather hear about my lousy childhood and all that David Copperfield kind of crap.

Ha! The best writers steal shamelessly.

If you want to steal from me, here's an opening sentence that was actually published long, long ago.

Water hazards and sand traps took a back seat to a real danger at the Freeport Municipal Golf Course on Tuesday — chlorine gas.

(that was the first thing of mine that came up in a google search that is not from a publication that currently employs me)

Nobody died or even threw up a little. It was a real bummer.


Hey -- that can be my novel opening!