Is It Time To Let Go....?

I've been dating this guy for a couple of months now. We work together but no one knows about us because he is on the "d/l" (downlow).

I've gone "out of my way" for this guy. I'm always available to him when he wants to get together. If we are not working on the same night I always send him a nice text message just before I know he's going to start his shift wishing him a good night at work.

I always make it a point to reach out to him. I've even made a CD for him of songs that I felt best expressed the feelings I have for him.

Lately things haven't been "quite right". Yesterday morning he stopped by and he really didn't have much to say. I asked what was wrong. He of course said nothing. Last Saturday we worked together and we took a break together and he was quite. When he takes a break with other co-workers he's usually full of conversation.

Last night he worked but I didn't. I decided not to text message or call just to test to see if he would seek me out. Nothing. No text message and no phone call.

This is getting frustrating because he runs hot and cold. One week he's receptive the other he's aloof.

Am I giving too much of myself? Should I just let this go? I really like him...alot but I'm just at a loss of what I should do.

I normally don't spill my personal stuff here on this board but I really want to know what you guys think and/or would do.

You know best, I keep telling myself this and then I wind up trying to justify his behavior. I'm in denial. Deep down I know I have to let this go. I don't have to see him until Saturday, which is the night we're scheduled to work together. With his track record I'd bet my year's salary he won't bother to call me at all for the rest of the week.

Yep, from the guy who REALLY does know ... bah, bye!
( I just cut one of "them" loose last week.)

papa knows best.



Actually, It's tough when you have strong feelings for someone. I don't think you're in denial.

Logic always seems to get trampled by emotion. Everyone has trouble with that.

It's not an easy choice to make, but it's what's best for you. Try to remember that. You'll be stronger and "less messed up" from it, if you can listen to your head, not your heart.

...and trust me... when it's "right," you'll know it. You won't have to worry about it or struggle with it, or doubt it. Everything from both "interested parties" will come easily and naturally.

So says "Dear Flabby."

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Not only should you move on, but you should be sure to let slip about how you're dating this super hot new guy.

j/k, unless it would work.

nah, j/k, period.

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This is for him ReBo..NOT you !!!!

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Well I guess it takes one to know one doesn't it Liverska--- pool

Passive/Agressive men seem to be in abundance these days.

Is it right to want to kick the living sh!t out of him?

No, no I know this is not right. It goes against all my Buddhist principles.

But somehow I can't help but think it.

And therapuetic

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best said it best.

listen to his actions and not so much to his words.

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...'cause guys will tell you ANYTHING you want to hear.

But the ACTIONS are the truth.

If you follow my friendly advice, you'll be able to spot insincerity a lot more easily... and sooner. And the longer you linger, the harder it is to get out of it.

So says "Dear Flabby" again.

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I was really beginning to have feelings of self-doubt and insecurity over all of this, that maybe there was something wrong with me.

...This is how you end up "messed up."

You think it's YOU. And it's a no-win situation.

The problem is that you wish he wouldn't act the way he does. But you have no control over how anybody else acts.

You only (hopefully) have control over your own actions. That's something you CAN change. You can decide to stick around, or to move on.

But you can't change the other person. That's what you have to come to grips with.

Make your decisions based on the current situation as you see it, not how you "hope it might be" in the future. That's where you'll get into trouble.

So many romantics in the world! Try not to be a "hopeless" one.

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Updated On: 10/23/07 at 11:04 AM