Sonoma County Separates Elderly Gay Couple- Page 2

[Phyllis Rogers Stone]

Posted: 4/19/10 at 2:21pm

I think this is the same story I posted via Joe My God (and I don't think gay people are allowed to question him) in the hospital rights thread last week. It's a good reminder that the visitation business is just indeed crumbs and that you can draw up all the paperwork they tell you to and you can still wind up SOL.

and lives are being destroyed while we wait for those in power to keep their promises.

Yeah, that's what I keep thinking. And it's NOT that I think a sweeping repeal of DOMA will be a magical panacea, but I don't see how chipping away at things individually is really going to help, except to further muddy the waters, where hospitals will exercise their discretion wrongly. Sure, there will be law suits, but that's going to be little consolation to surviving partners who weren't allowed to be with their loved ones when they died.

People seem confounded that this happened over in the link as well, which I really don't get. This kinds of stories shouldn't come as a surprise to anyone.

[romantico]

Posted: 4/19/10 at 2:24pm

LOL! Your sarcasm suggests something else. Again I ask, can you explain in detail how Obama could have prevented this from happening. I mean, that IS what you are suggesting.The state of California and the elected officials by your logic are all off the hook. It all falls on Obama. The article does not give dates or document when some of these things occurred. My guess Obama was either not in office yet or just sworn in. Roscoe, explain to me how Obama could have prevented this incident from happening and you justify blaming him for this.You can be as sarcastic as you like.I'm asking you to explain how this all falls on Obama's hands.

[romantico]

Posted: 4/19/10 at 2:30pm

Kate Kendell is the National Director for the National Center for Lesbian Rights, a national legal organization committed to advancing the legal and human rights of lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender people.

http://www.thepetitionsite.com/1/sonoma-county-ca-separates-elderly-gay-couple

This happened in 2008. Obama was not sworn in until January of 2009

http://www.care2.com/causes/civil-rights/blog/elderly-gay-couple-separated-by-sonoma-county-officials-violating-couples-express-wishes/#comment-634965

Updated On: 4/19/10 at 02:30 PM

[Phyllis Rogers Stone]

Posted: 4/19/10 at 2:38pm

He never blamed Obama. You keep saying he did, but he didn't.

[romantico]

Posted: 4/19/10 at 2:39pm

Started back in this thread.

https://forum.broadwayworld.com/readmessage.php?thread=1014504&boardname=off&dt=92&boardid=2

He praised Obama but then went on that he was not doing enough.WHats with the sarcasm here if he was not directing blame towards Obama?

He wrote:

"What a shame we don't have someone in a position of considerable power who could fiercely advocate for full equality under the law for all Americans. Until then we'll just have to suck it up with our current our current President, who is of course better than McCain Palin and all that."

Updated On: 4/19/10 at 02:39 PM

[ErikJ972]

Posted: 4/19/10 at 2:42pm

That quote says nothing about blaming Obama for this happening.

[Phyllis Rogers Stone]

Posted: 4/19/10 at 2:44pm

That's drawing a comparison (and keeping it current). He does not blame Obama for this situation. He's also just reminding himself that the OTHER guy would have been worse, like he keeps getting reminded by others.

[romantico]

Posted: 4/19/10 at 2:47pm

Oh I see. SO when he said,

"What a shame we don't have someone in a position of considerable power who could fiercely advocate for full equality under the law for all Americans."

He was actually praising Obama because Roscoe is always complimenting our President for all is efforts towards GLBT issues. I get it. My mistake.Roscoe, I had no idea that is what you meant. No sarcasm there at all.

[Roscoe]

Posted: 4/19/10 at 3:05pm

Romantico, dear boy. I think you ought to sit down calmly, take a stress pill, and think things over.

I never blamed Obama for this hideous breach of basic humanity. Ever. Nor would I. Ever. Unless of course photos surfaced of Obama aiding in the arrest and the sale of the personal objects in question. Then I'd let loose with a parade of "I told you so" postings.

I was in fact being sarcastic when I said that "what a shame" etc. line. You were quite right the first time. I was in fact bemoaning the fact that the President has shown little interest in GLBT rights, beyond using them to get elected and to make pretty speeches. Others seem to have gotten the point. You, as usual, did not. Do us both a favor. Don't bother reading my posts any more.

[romantico]

Posted: 4/19/10 at 3:11pm

DO me a favor. Don't criticize someone who is at least doing something for the GLBT community. Sure, it ain't much but you bitch when he doesn't do enough and you bitch when he actually does do something. No way of winning. Your feelings towards Obama is no secret.He did a great things last week and it relates to this story. So, your sarcastic rant made absolutely no sense at all (surprise surprise!) I have my own issues with him and will be the first to side with you when I feel he is actually not doing something for us.I've had plenty of posts where I have gone off on him. My attitude is we should be grateful for the little things he does do and remember how it was under Bush and how it would be under McCain.You want everything done in one day.You claim he shows little interest towards GLBT issues but then when he does do something all you do is bitch. Fact is no President or politician will ever do what YOU want done.

Don't bother reading your posts anymore? LOL!Seriously? I get this mental picture of you storming upstairs slamming the door. Grow up!

Updated On: 4/19/10 at 03:11 PM

[Roscoe]

Posted: 4/19/10 at 3:19pm

Dear boy, I was only thinking of you and your blood pressure. Read my posts if you like. And go right ahead being appreciative of the little things that Obama is doing, and ignore his total lack of action on the BIG F*CKING THINGS that he's leaving left undone while gay men and women suffer the consequences of his inaction.

[Plum]

Posted: 4/19/10 at 3:22pm

30 seconds of research reveal the mysterious party behind this publicity campaign. It's the National Center for Lesbian Rights, which according to its "about us" page has been around since 1977.
NCLR Elder Law Project Updated On: 4/19/10 at 03:22 PM

[romantico]

Posted: 4/19/10 at 3:24pm

My blood pressure is fine.You are the one upset that Obama has not found a cure for cancer yet.I will take your advice. I will go on appreciating Obama's efforts. Wish he would move faster and do more, but I know it's better than what we have seen in 8 years and better than any Republican who would be elected to the White House. FYI, I am not ignoring anything. I just fail to see what good comes from people like you who always find things to complain about. (and you talk about my blood pressure!) No gays will suffer for what he signed into action last week.He has a lot more work to do, but if he was dealing with hundreds of Roscoes along the way, nothing would get done.

Updated On: 4/19/10 at 03:24 PM

[blueroses]

Posted: 4/19/10 at 3:30pm

Actually, I think that if he were dealing with hundreds of Roscoes along the way, he'd get things done a lot faster. He's overly concerned with coming across as non-partisan.

You view President Obama through a more optimistic lens than Roscoe, and that's fine. But you really need to stop taking his opinions so personally, romantico. They have nothing to do with you.

I applaud the recent legislation and think it is a step in the right direction.

Updated On: 4/19/10 at 03:30 PM

[romantico]

Posted: 4/19/10 at 3:35pm

I don't see it that way. I don't think we'd get more done.I don't take anything Roscoe says personally or seriously.I do think he means well and I think he knows we both agree to disagree.I would love to see Gavin Newsom as Governor of California but it will never happen,which makes me sad.I think he is a strong advocate and more liberal than Obama.Just seems like you have to be right down the middle to get anything done and compromise is just part of politics.Frustrating as hell.

Updated On: 4/19/10 at 03:35 PM

[Roscoe]

Posted: 4/19/10 at 3:38pm

Of course, if gay marriage were a financial institution that needed bailing out, Obama'd have bailed us all out withing ten minutes of taking office.

So what's going to happen with these Sonoma people? Any guesses?

I'm guessing a bit fat zero, but that's just cynical old me.

[romantico]

Posted: 4/19/10 at 3:43pm

Actually, I agree with you for once. I doubt it will even be covered in the news.Keep hearing about law suits,but that's a stretch.

The bailout vs. Gay marriage? Really? Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.

[JerseyGirl2]

Posted: 4/19/10 at 3:56pm

I just really can't wrap my head around the fact that this didn't get any publicity when it was happening two years ago. The younger of the two men was still at home while these people were coming in to clean him out? Call me a cynic, too, but is there more to this? All the facts I have read are lifted directly from the press release from the NCLR. No one has any idea what happened to their pets? They had no friends that got involved? Nothing they could say could make this situation right, but there has to be more to the story.

[Phyllis Rogers Stone]

Posted: 4/19/10 at 4:07pm

My thought is that it's getting traction (on BWW and on gay blogs, maybe not so much in the actual country) is because it's timely. I don't feel like there's anything nefarious behind it.

[JerseyGirl2]

Posted: 4/19/10 at 4:10pm

Absolutely, I just can't imagine anything like this happening without the neighbor of a friend of a friend of someone who gave a damn finding out about it. I would be standing somewhere screaming at someone.

[Q]

Posted: 4/19/10 at 4:12pm

I think it had more to do with their money situation (or lack thereof) than their relationship status.

[TheatreDiva90016]

Posted: 4/19/10 at 5:12pm

Quit all of your bitching and do something about it

[Plum]

Posted: 4/19/10 at 7:54pm

I just really can't wrap my head around the fact that this didn't get any publicity when it was happening two years ago.

Do legal advocacy for the poor, elderly, and otherwise disadvantaged for a while and these kind of stories lose the power to shock. I'm guessing that the elder law project didn't pick up their case until most of the disaster had already happened, probably because it wasn't referred to them until that point.

I'm also guessing that neither member of the couple had an attorney appointed to them when the conservatorship was put in place, their belongings were auctioned off, etc., because in those instances you aren't entitled to a lawyer. The county agency for the aged was supposed to be representing their interests and instead it did just the opposite.

And if you think something like this can't happen without a neighbor noticing and doing something about it? You're vastly overestimating many people's interest in their neighbors.

This is an exceptionally awful case - believe it or not, that press release is actually less horrifying than the details in the complaint - but not one I find unbelievable. "Due process" is such a...variable term.

Updated On: 4/19/10 at 07:54 PM

[Roscoe]

Posted: 4/19/10 at 9:14pm

Dan Savage has posted about this today, sharing a link to a pdf of the complaint filed in Sonoma Coutny Court today.


Link To Story With PDF

[Jordan Catalano]

Posted: 4/20/10 at 9:11am

What I don't understand is (and forgive me if this was posted somewhere) how can the county just confine someone to a nursing home? Was this man visibly ill as well and too frail to live alone? From everything I've read it seems like imprisonment.